5
I kept tapping my feet on the floor of the living room as I watched Jane and Lindsey have a friendly conversation while babysitting me. Who would have thought my mom knew I was about to take my life when she walked into my room two months ago? I still found it difficult to believe, even when I couldn't find the wolf bane vial in my cupboard. She acted oblivious to it and never talked about it. But I know she took it because it was just the two of us in the house, except now Jane and Lindsay had to come over almost all the time to look after me when my mom was away. They came frequently now it was my ninth month.
"Are you okay?" Lindsey asked from the other side of the living room, sitting on the three-in-one couch with her friend, Jane.
Thanks to Jane, I got to wear a maternity gown. She was a tailor in the village and made me lots of maternity gowns even though fabric materials came in short supply. Lindsey made sure I was medically okay. Larry found a way to sneak in routine drugs and drugs for antenatal treatments for me. And my mom made all these possible. Without her love and support, I would have been long gone, six feet beneath the ground and rotten, if the village chose to bury me after my death.
"I'm fine."
Jane regarded me for a while and said, "Stop tapping your feet on the floor if you are."
"Oh." I stopped.
"Are you sure you're okay?" Lindsey asked, her face showing concern. "Do you want to use the bathroom?"
That idea sounded like what I needed the most to leave their presence, but knowing one of them would tag along, I replied, "I'm fine."
They carried on with their conversation, and I carried on with my dark thoughts. Thoughts of how I could lose those two shifters sitting before me and end my life. My mom would never forgive me, but she wouldn't still forgive me if she realized I lied to her. So, what was the difference? She might even hate me forever if she found out the truth about whom the father of the child was.
As I felt a wave of pain in my lower abdomen, instinctively, I placed my hand on my big stomach, pulling my back away from the couch. As if I were imagining the pain, it completely vanished, like it was never there.
"Are you okay?" Lindsey asked again.
Did Lindsey have eyes in the corner of her head that enabled her to see all my moves? How was she doing it?
"I'm…" I felt something. Lindsey told me about "water breaks", and what happened after that. It was happening. I just felt it. My water had broken. I refused to let Jane and Lindsey know that my water had just broken, sitting there like nothing happened. I felt wet, like I wet myself, and the water soaked in the couch. My mom would kill me for this one.
"What, do you feel pain?" Lindsey asked.
"Do you both ever have something to do in your houses?" I yelled at them without meaning to.
Unable to school the anxious sensation reeling inside me, I began tapping my feet again on the floor; my thumbnail found its way in between my teeth, and I bit down on it. Realizing Jane and Lindsey might catch wind of what was going on, I clasped my hands together, burying them in between my maternity gown; so that they wouldn't catch sight of my nails clawing hard against the backs of my hands.
Jane walked over to where I had been sitting on the couch, which was now soaked with fluid. She sat on the armrest of the couch since the single couch wouldn't contain the both of us. Placing her hand on my shoulder, she softly said, "I know this isn't easy for you, but you're almost there."
"You don't understand. I can't have this baby," I said in a trembling voice, tilting my head to her, tears streaming down my face. I tried to hold back my emotions, but I couldn't. I just couldn't.
"You would rather not leave the village, we get it." She slicked my hair, tucking it behind my ears as she said, "You'll stay with us as long as you want, mm."
"What will happen to the baby?" I asked, sobbing.
"Let us worry about the baby," Jane said across the living room.
That wasn't my only problem. What the baby would look like was what scared me the most. If the baby ended up looking like Alpha Rhys, Jane, and Lindsey would turn against me, Larry would drag me around the village with the baby tied around my neck like a scarf, and my mom would forever hate me. I couldn't have the baby. That was final.
I moaned out loud, placing my hands on my stomach, the throe so unbearable I wanted it gone any second. I continued to moan, the pain driving me insane. It felt like the baby was kicking hard on the walls of my womb, trying to find a way out. Lindsey and Jane helped me to my mom's room downstairs, and I followed, too helpless to resist their assistance.
"Stop it," I yelled out of frustration, hoping the baby would understand, yet the excruciating pain kept circulating my whole body, changing everything inside me to pain.
Jane tied my mouth with a scarf, muffling the entire sound I kept making, while Lindsey knelt before my feet that stayed flat on the bed as she instructed. I held Jane's hand, tightening my grip each time the pain waved through me like a storm.
"The child is ready, Jas," Lindsey said in a low voice. "All you have to do is push."
The urge to push was all over me, tugging at me. I didn't need to hear Lindsey's interaction before doing what my instinct was already forcing me to do. Somehow, the fear of what the baby would look like overwhelmed the agonizing pain I felt.
Jane dabbed off sweat from my forehead with a cold towel.
"What are you doing?" Lindsey asked in a perplexed, yet low tone.
"What's going on?" Jane asked.
"She's not pushing the baby."
"Come on, Jasmine, you need to push the baby. Once you give birth to this child, I promise it will no longer be a burden to you."
I bet Lindsey would quickly take back her promise once she saw the baby. I was already getting tired. The pain began to mitigate. I softly sighed at the little relief.
"Why's the music not on?"
I heard my mom's voice as she made her way into the room. I barely registered the sounds of her feet as I began to feel drowsy. I heard the rock music playing while Lindsey told my mom everything that happened in her absence.
"Mom," I called faintly through the scarf when she sat on the bed, squeezing at my hand. I managed a smile.
"You have to push." She took the towel from Jane and began cleaning my face.
"I'm tired, Mom," I muttered and swallowed. "I'm so tired."
After feeling a needle pierce my thigh, the sudden urge to push again surged through me.
"I don't want to push, please," I said weakly, whimpering.
"Trust me, jas, you won't regret this. I'll be with you every step of the way as you recover from everything you went through," my mom insisted.
"You don't understand."
"Push, Jasmine," my mom said through gritted teeth.
"No," I yelled back, and…shit. The baby's head just came out. I mouthed, "No."
"You need to push one more time, Jasmine," Lindsey said.
"She won't push. Drag the rest of it out. She wouldn't care what it looked like." My mom got out of the bed, tossing the towel at me.
"No." I cried.
"What are you waiting—"
Tears poured down the corner of my eyes as I pushed; the action cut into my mom's words. I heaved more tears as the baby came out. The baby's wails crushed my heart, so I struggled to sit on the bed and stretched my hand to carry the baby. My mom took the baby from Lindsay instead, after Lindsay cut the umbilical cord.
"Let me carry my child." The urge to carry my child swept over me.
"You will get attached if you do," Jane said, detaching her hand from mine and freeing my mouth from the scarf.
"What do you mean?" I asked, trying to catch my breath.
"Larry will help you get rid of—"
"I'll do it myself," my mom said, cutting Jane off.
"Do what yourself?" I asked, confused.
"That was the only way for you to be alive. You were long gone for abortion," Lindsey said.
Catching on, I blurted, "That's bullshit." I stretched my arms to receive my child. "Give me my child."
"What's wrong with you, Jasmine?" my mom asked, fuming. "You tried to kill yourself and this baby, and now, all of a sudden, you want the child?"
"Give me my baby." I ignored her question and got out of the bed, plodding towards her.
The baby began crying, and my mom gasped as she stared down at the child. I abruptly stopped in my tracks. She must have seen alpha Rhys's striking features on the child's face. I swallowed hard when tears fell from my mom's eyes.
"Does the baby look familiar?" I managed to ask, wondering what to do next.
"Ye…" she quickly cleaned her eyes. "Just handsome."
She looked down on the baby again with a faint smile. "He looks so handsome."
I softly sighed. For the first time in nine months, I felt a big relief on my chest.
Jane and Lindsey went to see my handsome son for themselves.
"Gosh, he's handsome," Lindsay said, smiling at him.
"How will you know that when he's this tiny…oh wait," Lindsay pointed at him. "He has the same mole as Jas."
My baby looked like me. I was over the moon after hearing their warm words. I walked to my mom, and slowly, she handed my baby over to me. My heart began thumping. At the same time, I felt guilty for everything I'd put him through. I wasn't sure I could ever forgive myself.
When he opened his eyes, I felt like squealing that the music playing in the background wouldn't be able to stop passersby from hearing my voice. I curbed that feeling, but the squeal was going on inside my head. Not only did he not look like Alpha Rhys, but he also didn't have his eyes. His eyes were emerald green, not my eye colors as well.
"Mummy is sorry for everything," I implored, looking at my son who also stared at me.
"He forgives you," my mom said, stepping towards us. "What will you name him?"
I never thought of a name, but seeing him in my arms, I knew what his name would be. "Treasure. I'll name him Treasure. He's my chest of treasure."
"And you must protect your chest, no matter what," my mom said, placing her hand on my shoulder as she took another look at Treasure.
"You have to leave this village to do so," Jane said, stepping closer as well.
That again. I couldn't leave the village. Danica and Alpha Rhys were waiting for me in the city to end me for good. I didn't have to go to the city to protect Treasure; I thought as I got an idea of what to do.