Under us, the guy let out an angry snarl, then blasted us away with a burst of Magic.
I flew back, but Llewellyn was faster, jumped on a gust of wind and tackled him again, forcing him down and bringing his sword to his throat in a split second.
"Don't make me use it," he said, threatening.
The guy let out another muffled sound.
I tucked Penguin deeper into my pocket, signaling him to stay hidden, and scrambled up again. Llewellyn and I deactivated our concealment—though I kept the one on Penguin on—and spun the guy around so we could talk face to face.
The guy looked up at us, clearly recognizing us, and deflated, closing his eyes.
"How does this day keep getting worse?!" he sighed.
He didn't sound scared at all, actually, just tired.
"I can't imagine you don't have more important things to do. Did the System send you to harass me? I don't care who it sends! I don't care how much it offers! I'm never signing a contract! I told it multiple times and it's not going to change."
Huh?
"We're not here about any contract," Llewellyn said. "We're here because you were at Baekhaven's Night Market after the mess with the Destabilized Artifact and because of whatever you did to that Dungeon in Liorim Forest. Who the hell are you?"
The guy blinked.
"That was you two? Destroying weeks of hard work?! For the record, I had nothing to do with the Destabilized Artifact. I only went to the Night Market to— Ah." He raised his hand to rub his eyes. Llewellyn pressed his sword closer, but the guy didn't seem to be afraid or intimidated. "You followed me from there." He sounded resigned. "I only went to take a look. I wanted to get a sense of the magic lingering in the area after a Destabilization event. It wasn't my doing."
Llewellyn seemed to run something through the System—maybe to check if he was lying? But I couldn't tell from his expression what he found out.
"Why would that interest you?" Llewellyn said again, sword pressing closer.
"Why not?" the guy said. "It's a public area."
"It was an area cordoned off from civilians. You sneaked in."
The guy looked more and more annoyed.
"Look," he said. "Just because you're the hero doesn't mean you get to decide who's allowed to look into what. I know Magic. Why wouldn't I be interested in an unexpected magical phenomenon happening in a public space? And do we need to have this conversation with me on the ground?"
Llewellyn didn't move his sword.
"We're having this conversation right here until you give me a reason not to hand you over to KARMA," he said. "Start with your name. Who the hell are you?"
The guy grumbled something.
Llewellyn's sword inched closer.
"I didn't hear you."
"My name is Gilded," the man said, still grumbling—and I remembered Alberan saying 'Welcome to Gilded Bay! Hope ye brought yer sea legs!'
"…"
…Honestly.
"Never heard of you," Llewellyn said—just as I said, "Wait... You named your custom Dungeon after yourself?!"
"What?" Gilded said. "No? Ah. Well, to be fair, it wasn't even halfway done." He looked even more frustrated now. "What did you say it looked like when you went in?"
"I didn't."
Llewellyn was frowning.
"What were you doing to that Dungeon?"
"That's none of your business."
Llewellyn's sword pressed closer and a thin line of blood appeared on Gilded's throat.
I watched his face carefully, but he just looked more frustrated.
"Look," he said. "I modified the Dungeon. I didn't name it anything. I was going to sign it, but I wasn't done. Happy now?"
"No," Llewellyn said. "What does 'done' mean in this context?"
Gilded rubbed his eyes.
"I just wanted a nice, peaceful cruise ship experience. Maybe some light jazz, a buffet, a scenic view of the ocean… Is that too much to ask?"
We both blinked.
"You modded a Dungeon… for a vacation?" I asked.
"Why not? Besides, it was also research. I wanted to see if I could do it, but you can't just change a pirate ship into a luxury liner, you have to do it in layers. Can I get up now? This is seriously uncomfortable."
Llewellyn's eyes narrowed.
"If you teleport away, I'll make sure to hunt you down myself," he said.
The guy sighed.
"Fine. No teleporting."
Llewellyn lowered his sword and Gilded got up, dusting off his clothes.
He was honestly too fashionable. His jacket, which he was now fussing over, was this long dark teal velvet thing with a stand-collar, a soft drape, and ornate embroidery running along the front edges, cuffs, and hem, looking like it was actual gold. It made him look halfway between aristocratic and rakish.
"Now explain," Llewellyn demanded.
"There's not much to explain. You have to make incremental changes. The first step was to keep the pirates, but tone down the violence and pillaging to something closer to my intended target theme. From there, I was trying to get rid of the pirates entirely. Depending on how that went, more tuning might have been required. To put it bluntly, I can't change the visual if the vibe doesn't match, so the first step was changing the vibe."
Why did he change the vibe to horny pirates though!? Unless that was the kind of vacation he had in mind?
But I couldn't just ask that. Besides—
"How did you even know what kind of Dungeon it was before entering it?" I asked. "Not even the System knows that."
"It doesn't?" Gilded asked, sounding gleeful. "Well. I have my methods. Which I'm not about to share with you."
Llewellyn's eyes narrowed, his sword up again.
"Fine, fine!" Gilded said, raising both hands. "Just so you know, I could fight my way out of this and have you both flat on the ground before you even know it. You're lucky I don't like fighting and I don't want to deal with the consequences. Anyway, even if I explain how I do it, it won't help you unless you have the skills and knowledge. I start with a ton of astrological work to find the right place. I needed something I could modify without wiping out valuable loot, so I needed to locate a Dungeon with no loot, or with something insignificant. Then I do insights work to determine what kind of setting it has. I can evoke insights about places. It's not very reliable, but I make it work. It took me a whole day of sitting there just to confirm it was pirate-themed. After that I start the modding work."
Someone was walking in our direction. They were still far away but if they'd come closer we'd be recognized.
I grabbed Gilded by the sleeve and yanked him off the street toward the closest group of trees.
He protested but didn't fight us.
"Why not just sign the contract?" Llewellyn asked. "You're clearly skilled."
"I'm averse to contracts, Terms and Conditions, being told where to go and what to do. As I said, I don't like fighting. I don't want to be involved in anything to do with it."
"Not everyone with a System contract fights," Llewellyn said—just as I said, "Most people would kill for a System contract."
"Most people don't know what's good for them," Gilded shot back. "Now, if we're done here—"
"We're not," Llewellyn said, pushing him down on a bench. "Sit. You still haven't explained what you're doing in Haneve."
Gilded looked resigned.
"Shopping. There's a specialty shop here that sells specific crystals I need." He pulled out a small bag from his coat and shook it. Something rattled inside. "See? Receipt and all. Are you going to tell me that's not allowed either?"
Wait… Crystals again?
"Crystals for what?" I asked.
His eyes narrowed, then he seemed to just give in. "Another Dungeon, obviously," he said. "Can I go now?"
I wondered if he knew anything about the Shard of Living Magic, but it felt unwise to ask. If he didn't know, we'd be giving away valuable information.
Llewellyn's eyes narrowed again. "You can't just go around modifying Dungeons," he said.
"What's it to you? Are you planning on following me around everywhere? Because that seems like a waste of your valuable hero time."
"Modifying Dungeons could destabilize them and create new Distorted Realms, which then would be very much my problem."
"Could," Gilded said. "But it won't, as it hasn't happened so far. Because I know what I'm doing."
"How much Dungeon tampering has been going on?" Llewellyn asked, sounding dangerous again.
Gilded seemed to register that because he pinched the bridge of his nose.
"Look," he said. "I didn't hurt anyone. The Dungeons I modify are more stable than before, not less. The System hasn't stopped me, KARMA hasn't noticed... As far as I can tell, nobody even knows these Dungeons can be modded except me. Now, are we done here?" He checked his watch. "I have a dinner reservation."
I glanced at Llewellyn. He was studying Gilded like he still didn't know what to make of him.
"I really do have a reservation," Gilded said. "If you're not planning to hand me in, I'll be off."
"We should hand you in," Llewellyn said. "Let's say we let you go. How do we find you again?"
"You don't," Gilded said, sounding appalled at the idea.
Llewellyn's eyes narrowed.
"Give me a phone number where we can reach you."
That was a good idea.
"I'll save it," I said, pulling out my phone.
"What if I refuse?" Gilded asked.
Llewellyn's sword shot up. "Do you really want to test that right now?"
Gilded gritted his teeth and started rattling off his phone number.
I typed it into my phone and pressed call.
His phone started ringing. Well, at least he hadn't lied.
"Good," I said. "Now we can reach each other if needed."
"I'll make sure to hassle you as much as possible," Gilded said, with relish.
Whatever.
"You do that," I said, unbothered, pocketing my phone.
Behind me, Llewellyn's sword made a scraping sound against the ground.
Gilded eyed it.
"I might even consider hiring you," he continued suddenly in my direction. "If you ask nicely. I'm going to need an assistant. Your references seem glowing."
"He's not interested," Llewellyn said.
"I wasn't aware I was asking you."
"You're not asking him either," Llewellyn said. "You're leaving. Now. Before I change my mind."
"Am I?" Gilded said, pleased. "Good to know."
He stood up, brushing off his coat with exaggerated care. "Delightful meeting you both. Let's never do this again. Oh, and by the way," he smiled broadly. "You two might want to hide your love bites."
And vanished.
"…"
Uh. Um. Well.