In the hospital, the white walls, the white sheets, the air was filled with the cold, pungent smell of disinfectant.
Shen Che lay on the hospital bed, an IV tube in his arm, a clear liquid dripping into his body. He was awake but still looked extremely weak.
Lin Zhou sat by the bed, her eyes red and swollen, silent.
Neither of them spoke. The room was terrifyingly quiet, with only the beeping of the monitor.
Finally, Shen Che broke the silence. He looked at her, his eyes filled with endless guilt and pain.
"You... know everything now?"
Lin Zhou didn't answer. She just took the crumpled medical report from her bag and placed it on his bedside table.
A simple action, yet it spoke volumes.
Shen Che's gaze dimmed. He knew he could no longer hide it. He gave a bitter smile, a smile that looked more painful than crying.
"I'm sorry, Zhou Zhou."
"Why didn't you tell me?" Lin Zhou finally spoke, her voice so hoarse it didn't sound like her own. "Why did you carry it all by yourself?"
"I didn't want to be a burden to you," Shen Che's answer was the same as before.
"A burden?" Lin Zhou's emotions flared up again. "In your mind, is love just a matter of addition and subtraction? Of weighing pros and cons? Shen Che, we were together for so many years. Don't you know me? Am I the kind of person who would abandon you just because you got sick?"
"I know you're not!" Shen Che became agitated, struggling to sit up, but Lin Zhou pushed him back down. "It's precisely because I know you're not that I had to leave you! I couldn't... I couldn't just stand by and watch you waste your youth and your future on a hopeless cripple! I couldn't be that selfish!"
His voice, agitated, broke into a fit of coughing, his face flushing red.
Lin Zhou looked at his pained state, and all her accusations and anger melted into heartache. She went over and gently patted his back, helping him catch his breath.
When he had calmed down, Lin Zhou spoke again, her voice calm this time.
"Shen Che, you're wrong. True selfishness is not giving me the right to choose. You presumptuously planned my life for me, pushed me away, thinking it was for my own good, thinking it was a great sacrifice. But have you ever considered my feelings?"
"For the past three years, I thought about you every day. I waited for you to come back every day. I treated your promise as my faith. I rejected everyone who was good to me. I was like a fool, guarding a monumental lie. Do you think what you did to me was fair?"
Shen Che couldn't answer. He looked at her tear-streaked face and realized for the first time just how much damage his so-called "protection" had caused her.
He thought he was loving her, but in reality, he was torturing her with love.