Sunshine Superman - The Spooky Space Kook Part 3
THE AVENGERS: EARTH'S MIGHTIEST HEROES AND THE NEW AGE OF MARVELS - DAILY BUGLE, SEPTEMBER 25TH 1963
Story By: Joseph Robertson
Photo By: Phil Sheldon
IMAGE: [At the top of the article, a black-and-white photo shows a group of five individuals in custome. An armored figure stands to the far right, and next to him, a tall, muscular man with long hair, wearing a cape and a winged helmet, a hammer hanging from one arm, the other placed on the shoulder of the armored man. To the left stands a somewhat heavyset man, slightly taller than the man in the helmet, his face covered by a pair of sunglasses and a bandana with an american flag pattern covering the lower half of his face, with one of his hands held up in a "V-sign". In the background, a massive giant of a man wearing a costume and a face mask is kneeling down to fit into the photo. A small, winged woman with a pointed helmet sits on his shoulder. Next to them stands an enormous, muscled man with brutish features, wearing only a pair of shorts.]
- Foreground: Iron Man, Thor, Mr Sunshine. Background: Giant-Man, Wasp, The Hulk.
Much has already been said in the media about the motley crew of masked crime fighters that have banded together under the banner of The Avengers. As most of our readers might already know, the group originally joined together in early September in the hopes of apprehending the Hulk, who at the time was thought to be responsible for the destruction of a railway, only to join forces with him and together defeat the true culprit behind the attack. According to the press release from Stark Industries, the sponsors behind Iron Man, the true culprit was an as-of-yet unidentified criminal hoping to frame the Hulk for his own purposes, though what these are remains unknown. Somewhat understandably, many were unsatisfied with this explanation, especially as The Avengers refused all requests from military officials to reveal the current whereabouts of The Hulk, who had not been seen since.
This appeared to have been a disastrous choice, as The Hulk was once again spotted in the afternoon of the 24th, attacking the site of the 1964 World's Fair, which sustained moderate damage during the assault, and the subsequent response by Thor trying to apprehend his former ally. However, witnesses, this reporter included, were left shocked when a SECOND Hulk entered the scene and engaged the original in battle, followed shortly by the rest of The Avengers. In the ensuing battle, the first Hulk was seemingly exposed as yet another imposter, presumably using the real Hulk's poor reputation against him.
IMAGE: [A strange, goblin-like creature is seen securely held in chains, a blindfold tied over it's eyes. Thor can be seen in the background from the chest down]
The imposter, a an alien being known as a "Space Phantom" according to information given to the Bugle by Thor, who had prior experience in dealing with the creatures, had arrived on Earth in the hopes of sowing discord using it's shapeshifting abilities, in the hopes of preparing our planet for an invasion, but found itself foiled when the Avengers did not turn on the Hulk as it had hoped and instead fought the creature as a unit, quickly defeating and restraining it.
In the aftermath of the battle, I was privileged to be granted an on-site interview with the Avengers, the first reporter they have decided to speak to as a team.
ROBERTSON: First of all, I'd like to thank you all for stopping that thing, both as myself, and on behalf of the rest of New York, battles between superbeings tend to be rough on the city.
AVENGERS: *murmurs of agreement*
IRON MAN: That's an understatement, you can still see where they had to repair the damage after the original Human Torch fought Namor, and that was over 20 years ago. It's a valid concern.
ROBERTSON: You are now the second team of superpowered individuals to make their home in New York, if you don't mind me asking, exactly why did you decide to form this team?
IRON MAN: It's no trouble, Mr. Robertson. We decided to form the Avengers to tackle threats that would be difficult for any one hero to face themselves, and while I mean no offense to the men of the NYPD, threats such as the Space Phantom may be a bit beyond their ability to handle.
ROBERTSON: You do not believe that the Fantastic Four is enough to combat these threats?
GIANT-MAN: While I hold Reed Richards in high regard, and I think we all do, he and his teammates are explorers and scientists first, and crimefighters second. In fact, our original encounter with the Hulk was due to the Four being busy elsewhere. It's a simple matter of numbers, even the Fantastic Four cannot protect the whole country by themselves, let alone the whole world.
ROBERTSON: Speaking of The Hulk, you've recieved quite a bit of criticism for your refusal to remand him to military custody, much less your decision to make him a part of the team. Why did you go against the wishes of government officials?
MR. SUNSHINE: Can I have this one?
IRON MAN: By all means.
MR. SUNSHINE: Let's just say that there's a LOT of holes in the official stories regarding the Hulk. He's neither a monster or a mindless, destructive force of nature.
ROBERTSON: And what is your response to statements that the Hulk presents a danger to the entire United States?
MR. SUNSHINE: Almost all those statements come from General Ross, right? Well, here's my statement: Ross is a mustachioed sack of [expletive]-
WASP: Sunshine!
HULK: *huff of laughter*
MR. SUNSHINE: What, you ever hear that guy talk? He's like an anti-ad for military recruitment, god knows I'd rather run away to Canada than risk having to serve under him!
ROBERTSON: I think we might be going off topic...
MR. SUNSHINE: Sorry, that man and his terrible facial hair just upsets my sensibilities. As I was saying, the Hulk does not present a particular threat against the U.S. I know it's a cliche, but in this case, society really is to blame.
ROBERTSON: How do you mean?
MR. SUNSHINE: The Hulk has verbal difficulties, making it hard for him to express himself, and even if he hadn't, every time he got close to anything resembling civilization, people either ran away from him or tried to shoot him. Very few people let him explain who he was and that he wasn't there to kill them all.
ROBERTSON: You're saying the Hulk is harmless?
MR. SUNSHINE: Of course not, none of us are harmless, we all have superhuman abilities, but that doesn't make us active threats. We all decided to use these powers to protect the world, and shocker, so did the Hulk once someone took five seconds and actually tried talking to him instead of chasing him with tanks!
ROBERTSON: And your response to the demands he be turned over to the military?
MR. SUNSHINE: Try it, you four-star [expletive]!
IRON MAN: While I wouldn't put it quite as... crudely as my fellow Avenger, The Hulk is one of us, and an attack on him is an attack on all of us. *murmurs of agreement from the rest of the team*
ROBERTSON: And Hulk, do you have any comments?
HULK: HULK WAS ALONE FOR LONG TIME. HULK LIKE HAVING TEAM. PUNY SOLDIERS STAY AWAY FROM HULK!
The interview concluded at this point, as the Avengers cited other commitments and left the scene, however Iron Man was kind enough to leave an offer for future interviews, to be published right here in the Daily Bugle. So, this has been the first official look the public has been given of the mismatched group making it's home in New York. Though many still consider the Hulk to be a threat, it can't be denied that his allies support him, even in the face of the U.S government itself. Wether this will be a good or a bad thing, well, that's up for the future to reveal. But one thing is certain.
IMAGE: [A photo of Giant-Man taken from below, showing him towering above as he walks over the photographer]
The Marvel Age has just begun.
- Joseph "Robbie" Robertson