The day should've ended with the shin kick. That would've been enough.
But no.
Apparently, the Regret System doesn't shut up.
As I walked home from school, a glowing blue dumpling floated beside my head.
"You lack ambition," it said, in the voice of a judgmental uncle.
I stopped. "You're a bao."
"I'm Baozi, your regret advisor," it replied, spinning smugly. "Now that your system's unlocked, I'm your personal guide to becoming slightly less of a disappointment."
"Did you just insult me with carbs?"
"Correct. +1 Insight."
A small screen flashed:
[+1 RP: Minor Social Shame – Talking to Floating Food in Public]
Across the street, someone gave me a look. I stared back until they walked into a pole. Justice.
"Why are you here?" I asked. "Can't the system work silently? Like, inside my brain?"
Baozi shrugged mid-air. "Regret is noisy. And you're the noisiest of all. Our records show you once regretted sending a 'lol' instead of 'lmao' and didn't sleep for two days."
"That was a serious vibe error."
Another screen popped up.
[REGRET QUEST UNLOCKED]Quest: Fix an awkward past message.Reward: 15 RP + Passive Skill: Text Precision – LV1Optional Bonus: Humiliation Immunity (Temporary)
"Wait - how do I fix that regret?"
"Confess. Apologize. Or send a better meme," Baozi said. "The system's flexible."
I groaned. "I just wanted to nap my way through high school. Not become a regret-fixing vigilante."
"Well, too bad," Baozi said. "You're the only one with the system. Which means you're either the chosen one or a universal error. Possibly both."
I sighed and kept walking. Regret correction sounded exhausting. But also… the kick felt really good.
As I reached my gate, another pop-up appeared:
[NEW TITLE UNLOCKED]"Shin Kicker of Class 3B"Effect: +5% physical damage when annoyedReputation: +10 with Rebels / -5 with Teachers
My sister was waiting at the door, arms crossed.
"You seriously kicked Chen Bao?"
"He started it."
"Doesn't matter," she said. "Everyone's talking about it. Some are calling you a legend. Others think you've lost it."
"Can't I be both?"
She narrowed her eyes. "You've got a glowing dumpling floating around your head."
"Yeah. He's my regret guide."
She blinked. "I don't even want to know."
Baozi nodded solemnly. "A wise choice."
I yawned, stretched, and plopped down on the sofa.
"Let me know if kicking people again gives me a sleep buff," I muttered.
[SLEEP REGRET DETECTED]"Regret: Stayed Up Until 3AM Watching Cat Videos."Correction Option: Sleep Before Midnight TonightReward: +20 RP, Passive Skill: Restful Slacker – LV1Effect: XP gain while sleeping
I sat up straight. "Wait… I can level up in my sleep?"
Baozi floated closer, eyes twinkling. "The strongest slackers… know when to nap."
And just like that, I knew.
This was my path.
Not heroism.
Not revenge.
Just fixing dumb mistakes for dumb powers - and sleeping my way to greatness.
I was Ye Zhen.Student. Shin kicker.And now…The most powerful slacker this timeline would ever regret underestimating.