Ayumi was certain that her fingertips had touched Reiha's palm, but the latter instead of grasping and pulling her over, gripped her wrist firmly then pushed her away with the force of a raging gale. Where did that powerful breeze come from, she could not tell as she was shoved away barely managing to keep her balance and not fall off the steep path shaking beneath her feet under Noboru's attack that engulfed the princess of the wind within a purplish dark aura.
"Reiha!!"
Ayumi shouted in panicked and afraid, her eyes widening in terror as she rushed toward the cloud of darkness obscuring the princess of the wind but despite her efforts, she was pushed back again by the same ongoing wind that dispersed the enemy's attack after a short but difficult struggle. Ayumi could finally exhale in relief seeing the princess emerge from within the ball of darkness. However, she was not unharmed. Reiha was panting heavily, her breaths racing like waves crashing the seashore, her clothes were tattered revealing deep cuts and bleeding injuries. Still, she did not seem weakened or in pain, her eyes still shining with determination and anger. Laila was visibly puzzled, where did that wind the princess had commanded to protect herself come from? On the other hand, Noboru was truly amazed by the display.
"Ferocious and tenacious as ever, princess Reiha! Amaterasu does not deserve this loyalty, neither does this silly girl… you are a wasted gem indeed!"
"Are you offering a position for me to join you?"
Reiha snickered, still panting arduously, her chest heaving like she was breathing stones instead of air.
"I would not dare, you are a dangerous woman, even as an alley!"
"This is the only sane thing you have uttered since your resurrection, I will honor you be ensuring it is the last thing as well!"
Taking a deep breath that her belly sunk deeply then exhaling it till her bosom plunged forward, she directed a whipping wind in Noboru's direction that he dispelled with a swing of his sword. At this display, Ayumi and Laila finally understood what was going on; Reiha was using what air she was breathing and harboring in her lungs to lunch her attacks. Such plan would cost her a lot of effort and weaken her, but she was determined to use any means available, and at that moment, trapped in this vicious suffocating void, only her breaths proved useful. She would not last long, and Ayumi flinched in worry and fear. She opened her mouth to protest but Reiha cut her off before she could speak a single word.
"I will hold them down, you go and find Chiyasu before it is too late!"
"But…"
"I will be fine, but Chiyasu might not be!"
At these words Ayumi made up her mind with the distressful decision, her heart torn with perturbation, but if there was anyone she could trust and believe in his resolve and resilience, it was Reiha.
"Please be careful and do not exert yourself!"
Reiha did not comment, her eyes focusing on the two enemies still floating in the obsidian void. Casting one last worried look at the princess of the wind, Ayumi repeated her plea and ran off in the opposite direction but Laila would not let her escape that easily.
"Where do you think you are going? I can send you to your Chiyasu faster as a corpse!"
Waving her giant ax like a wing weaved from the surrounding darkness, floating fluently amidst the gloom, Laila jumped in Ayumi's direction but another blast of Reiha's wind caged her like a barrier, clearing the path for Ayumi to quickly dash and run.
"I am the one you are fighting, do not dare look down on me and ignore me!"
Reiha commented, inhaling and exhaling faster than a drowning person, sending a storm after a storm, refusing to heed or listen to the pleas of her body for mercy and care.
***
Ayumi dashed forward, following the path forming beneath her running feet with every step she took, the sounds of the ongoing battle were echoing behind her, wind clashing against a steel blade, wind cutting through a formidable ax, and wind torn by a vicious sword… all repeating with different degrees of potency and competence with each new attack. She had to trust Reiha, otherwise she would not be able to save Chiyasu. The further she ran, the more distant the echoes of the battle became until they disappeared completely, and once again, the girl found herself strapped alone in this unforgiving darkness, only the floating souls passing slowly and peacefully offering her any sort of companionship and lighting the dim path.
The path kept forming beneath her steps, complying with her resolve to live and get her friend back alive. The souls, hanging around her like floating silver lanterns seemed perplexed by the presence of a soul clearly still dwelling within a living body, steering and powering it. It was a weird sight for them for this was a domain of limbo in some sense, and the souls started to fret, shaking in confusion. Ayumi noticed the change in their demeanor but paid it no mind since it was harmless. They were souls in the end, stripped of any physical abilities or bodily functions, they were not dangerous. However, it was her presence that seemed to be harming them as some started to jump closer to her, rubbing against her still breathing walking flesh.
"I am sorry, I am sorry! I know I am disturbing your peaceful passage but there is someone I have to save! Please do not mind me!"
Ayumi apologized repeatedly, slowing her pace out of respect. These lights consisting of gone by persons' essence could talk no more, and they had but one path to follow... There was no return for them. However, Ayumi had a feeling that they could hear her and understand her dilemma. She wished they would accept her apology and forgive her transgression.
Indeed, some souls were already beyond any carnal desire related to the living world, and they left this strange guest to her own devices, focusing on their sought relief. But others were not as kind, they still had attachment to the world of the living; longing, resentment, regret, lust… and they started rubbing more persistently against her, some even hindering her progress. It was not a vicious attack, but they craved one last chance, and that living body walking by their side provided the escape they needed.
Voices suddenly started to echo within Ayumi's mind, the souls could not speak or express their desires or regrets, they either had no further wishes and wanted to move on to the afterlife, or they wanted to latch into this unexpected chance of encountering a living functioning body and tried to infiltrate and take control of it. It was those souls whom Ayumi could somehow, thanks to the power of the light, hear their wishes and lingering desires.
Some souls were burdened with malice, pestering her relentlessly driven by unfulfilled desires and unquenched craving for revenge, lost wealth, cursing others, trying to possess her body to no avail, repelled by the scepter's power, while others who also wished to return to the world of the living were less forceful, they rubbed against her as if asking for permission or trying to draw pity out of the innocent girl. Ayumi could tell that this last less ferocious group merely wanted a brief chance to deliver their unsaid goodbyes, to express their love and yearning for those whom they loved and missed, their deaths like their lives denying them the chance and deeming it too late.
Ayumi would have been fine if she were unable to understand them, but with the new power she came to possess, these souls' wishes reached her heart needing no words or expressions. She could feel their pain, their hatred, their regret, their longing, their loss… and her head started to throb under all that pressure that she did not know how to pacify. These souls were countless, and she could not promise them all the fulfillment of their left earthly desires, neither could she blast them away with the light of the scepter. Ayumi had to focus least she be consumed by their demands… the only counter measure she could think of was covering her ears with her hands and running without stopping or catching a breath but these were not living beings, they did not communicate with words or phrases… their feelings simply reached her heart and mind casting their meanings there.
"I am sorry… I am truly sorry… I cannot help you but I promise I will pray for all of you… I will light incense in your names… so please, enough!"
This was the only salvation Ayumi could promise them. However, this offer did not seem to tune their endeavors down or calm their agitation.
Something was off.
Ayumi was indeed the new queen of light, and she had learned that Amaterasu was able to feel the despair and helplessness of others and purify it, but no one told her this gift extended to the dead as well. It did not make sense! How did Amaterasu not go mad under this immense whirlwind of emotions and desires? Noriko tried her best with the little time she was given to teach and tell Ayumi about everything, but she did not mention anything about dealing with the dead's unsettled regrets and whims. This part was the most upsetting and hopeless, so if it was in Amaterasu's power then Noriko should have told her about it, especially since she personally had guided her and the others to this place… something was missing.
Running out of breath, the girl stopped and bent down trying to regulate her breathing. She covered her mouth with her hands fearing the souls might use the orifices as entrance and possess her somehow. She did not even dare call out loud for Chiyasu.
"I only want to see them one last time… talk with them… say the goodbye I was denied… tell them to remain proud of me… that I have not disappointed them… just one last meeting! One last talk! A proper goodbye!"
Ayumi was startled at these words, she stood and turned around. The souls were still surrounding her, restless and agitated, but these wishes did not carry their different sounds.
It was her own voice.
It was her own soul expressing these desires.
She was calling to her parents.
The hands covering Ayumi's mouth suddenly felt wet, she traced the wetness all the way up her cheeks to her fluttering eyes realizing she was crying.
Scanning the balls of silver light, another realization donned on her. Even if she wanted to speak to her parents, they were long dead… they had probably passed this place into the other domain years ago. It was useless.
Another unfulfilled wish just like the wishes of those wandering souls.
She was already in the limbo leading to the afterlife, meeting them, as unfeasible as it was, did not seem that impossible at that instant.
Her legs abandoned their will to move, and her arms relaxed by her sides. She no longer paid attention to the ceaseless demands of the souls encircling her, her wish echoing throughout her body and dominating every other wish and desire. Her body felt heavy, and she slowly bent down and laid on the ground.
The moment she stopped walking, the path stopped there in accordance with her halted steps, no more stones to tread on were formed.
Curling on herself, hugging her knees close to her chest with tired arms like a fetus, Ayumi closed her eyes and sighed repeatedly, allowing the tears to flow freely.
There was no one to judge her in this place, there was no one to pretend in front of.
Why was it so peaceful in this place?
It felt like she was lying down for hours, but did time even exist in this a place?
How long had she been lying and waiting, calling and wishing?
Death might be peaceful, but this peacefulness came after death had overtaken the body and soul. For now, Ayumi was still alive… wishing to meet her parents meant wishing for death and the process of dying was not always peaceful, especially when one was not completely certain and assured.
Did Ayumi have lingering regrets or unfulfilled desires? Of course she had. She was only eighteen! Still, the desire to escape from everything, the routine, the planning for the future and its stress, the missing of her parents… this desire overcame everything else, even her attachment to and worry over her grandma.
The more time she spent lying down, the heavier her body became and the graver her wounds grew, reopening and bleeding with a searing pain. Her breathing turned laborious and a chocking sensation dominated her throat. Ayumi's condition, relaxed and content few moments ago, turned uncomfortable and scary but she knew these feelings will come to pass eventually, the instant she decided to give up on everything completely.
It seemed the souls started to recognize the state Ayumi was going through, and they stopped pestering her though dismayed at her choice. They had too many letters to send, too many unspoken words to deliver and their messenger that appeared by a miracle had apparently decided to join them on their journey instead of carrying on their stolen demands.
Recalling what little memories she had of her parents and summoning their visage into her mind were the only things Ayumi focused on. The yearning burnt strongly in her heart with every passing second. Nevertheless, it was not all that grew… fear over the anticipation of the unknown began to trickle into her heart as well, craftily and insidiously shaking her will and resolve.
Which feeling was she supposed to battle and drive away, the yearning or the fear?
Curling further on herself, she started to question the rightfulness of her decision… was it selfish? Sadly, this could only be determined by the people she was planning to leave behind, it was not her place to deny them this accusation, even if she herself was convinced that this choice was for the better whether for herself alone or for herself and the others as well.
She was condemning Chiyasu for making that choice, now she was ironically taking her side and walking the same path.
Did Chiyasu harbor the same hesitation when she was crossing this path or was she stronger and more resolved than her?
"Why could I not say goodbye to them? Why were not I given a chance to have one last talk with them?"
Ayumi wondered in bitterness, had she been given this small bless maybe she would not have been in this state right now.
It was just as Noboru had said, this was not her battle, it was another woman's revenge and justice… but she was chosen out of everyone else to deliver that justice.
Reiha was depending on her to free her from the vow binding her to the late queen, she openly stated that she had many other dreams to live for, dreams trapped in the clock that stopped at Amaterasu's demise.
Noriko had ventured the gate between the living and the dead to see her, encourage her and place her last wish within her hands so she can finally rest in peace.
Her grandmother had devoted all her life for her sake, and she was waiting for her return every evening, as she always did for the last few years.
But what about her? What about the girl named Ayumi? What did she want, what did she owe others and what did they owe her?
Amidst the stale air a strange fragrance filled her lungs, awakening her slumbering eyes, such a sweet mild scent should not exist in this place of death, but that smell starting weak at first kept growing bit by bit, engulfing her entire being, even placating the agitated souls surrounding her, bestowing upon that gloomy darkness a sense of meaning, a touch of liveliness, rekindling sought wishes still unfulfilled and dreams yet to be seen in a peaceful assuring fragrance and beauty.
Ayumi opened her eyes and straightened her back, and what she saw did not surprise her as much as it had enchanted her.
Sakura petals.
Small sakura blossoms floated the empty void, numerous as if plucked all together by a strong storm yet gliding calmly as if riding a gentle breeze. Ayumi reached her hands, and few petals rested on her palms, their color lighting the dimness the way hope illuminated despair. The souls started to follow the petals flow, forgetting about the living girl and their lingering regrets and desires. These petals had brought them peace and they surrounded and befell into Ayumi's hands to deliver the same message but with a different meaning, a message imploring the peace of her mind, and meaning to rekindle her will to live and go on with the many plans and dreams she had weaved for the future.
Where did these fragile yet resilient petals come from? Who sent them? There were no sakura trees in her line of vision, only darkness yet the blossoms continued to float like raindrops dousing a desolate heart.
The sight of the fluttering blossoms tugged at Ayumi's heart, bringing forth old memories and weaving ones yet to come. She had not seen many blossoms despite living in the most abundant area with sakura trees.. how many other things had she missed and deferred to a time that never came?
"Thank you…"
Ayumi whispered to the petals dancing around her. If she could be touched by such simple scenery, then life still had too much to offer and his many moments to be shared with the people she loved. In the same sense, since Chiyasu was still capable of growing beautiful petals and hearing their pleas and tales, then her desire to give up was not placed in the right time.
She had to save her, and save herself along.
Standing up once again, Ayumi did not dust the petals covering her, she held to them like a precious memento, a sign of her will to go on, and took a new step with the unwavering intention to save Chiyasu and return to Reiha and her grandmother. Answering to this wish and this new found resolution, the path started forming beneath her feet once again.