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Chapter 23 - Where Lucas Sits When I Blink

He doesn't say much during the day now.

But I see him.

Not in mirrors.

Not in dreams.

Just… there.

When I blink.

In class, he's in the seat behind mine.

Knees up on the chair.

Head tilted.

Watching the board like he understands everything I never could.

At lunch, he's across the table.

No tray.

No food.

Just him, resting his chin on his palm, eyes on me.

When I brush my teeth, he leans against the doorframe.

Smiling like he knows I'll never tell anyone.

Because who would believe me?

Sometimes I test it.

I blink fast.

Close my eyes for a second.

Open.

There he is.

Sitting.

Staring.

Still.

I used to scream when I saw him.

Now I just nod.

And sometimes?

Sometimes I talk to him out loud.

And people think I'm humming.

Or daydreaming.

He never moves much.

Never eats.

Never blinks.

But one time — just once — he spoke while I was in the hallway, pretending to tie my shoes.

"You're lonelier when I'm gone."

And I didn't disagree.

I saw the school counselor again.

She asked if I felt "stable."

I wanted to laugh.

Instead, I said, "Yes."

She leaned in.

"You seem more… centered."

I smiled.

Because I was.

Because Lucas was the center now.

And I was just orbiting around him.

That night, I sat at the window.

Lucas beside me.

The lights outside blurred like melting stars.

"Do you remember what the sky looked like from the attic?" I asked.

He nodded.

"Gray. But it was ours."

I fell asleep like that.

Side by side.

No words.

No sound.

Just a strange comfort in knowing that when I blink, I'm never alone.

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