Splash~
After a dazzling display of bartending, four small glasses of cola-colored liquor appeared in front of the group.
"For the first round, let's use your favorite—Jägermeister. I just diluted it a little, so you guys shouldn't have any problem with it~"
Shiro slid the glasses toward the two foreigners, his smile full of disdain.
The two foreigners had completely lost their earlier arrogance—after all, they had just witnessed Shiro's mixing process firsthand.
This guy literally just poured vodka and Jägermeister together and shook it!
That's what he calls "diluted"?!
He must've been "diluting" the vodka instead!
Looking at the two glasses in front of them, radiating that all-too-familiar scent, the corners of their mouths twitched.
"Are you really a bartender? (German)"
"Isn't it obvious~?"
Shiro pointed at the variety of bottles on the table—only a true bartender would have such a well-stocked arsenal.
"..."
Looking at the assortment of bottles, Iori and Kouhei were a bit stunned too.
They usually only brought a single bottle of "Aqua Vitae" when they went out—meanwhile, Shiro had basically carried an entire bar here...
But that just made things more fun!
The two grinned like fiends, clearly getting what Shiro was up to.
"Diluted"?
He meant diluting the sweetness of the Jäger, right?!
Sure, the alcohol content had gone up, but just a little!
The two foreigners didn't think much of it, and besides—
They had just realized something:
This game wasn't just about how much they could drink, it was about outdrinking the opponents!
And when they thought of their current opponents—
Pfft~
"Hmph, so what if it's mixed with vodka? Piece of cake! (German)"
"Just wondering if those two little kids over there can handle it! (German)"
Thud! ×2
Just as their words landed, two empty shot glasses were set down in front of them.
"Huh? What did you just say?"
"This mix really tastes better than before."
Iori and Kouhei looked at them teasingly. This so-called "diluted Jäger" didn't even qualify as a "hangover cure" in their world!
Seeing the two standing strong, the foreigners clicked their tongues in annoyance.
Still, they picked up their glasses and downed the drinks in one gulp.
"Just a bluff! (German)"
"The game's just getting started. Don't tap out too early! (German)"
Clearly, they were seasoned drinkers too. They downed the 40% alcohol shots without even blinking.
Too bad...
They were up against PAB!
Clink~
Just after finishing, another round of similarly-colored drinks appeared in front of them.
Shiro smiled lazily, like a cunning fox.
"Thanks for the hard work. Have some oolong tea to refresh yourselves~"
(′｀;)?
Oolong tea?
The two foreigners looked dumbfounded at the "tea" in front of them.
And then—
"Hahahahahahaha!!!"
More laughter erupted.
"As expected of kids! (German)"
"Already need tea after just one round? Ref, are you sure this isn't against the ru—wait, what the hell is that?! (German)"
The muscular magical girl's tone turned panicked, like he'd just witnessed something unspeakable.
That so-called "oolong tea" in front of him… was on fire.
"What did you say, contestant? This competition is perfectly fair~"
Shiro cheerfully explained while holding a lighter—and to drive the point home, he lit Iori's "oolong tea" as well.
Just like the foreigner's—it was flammable.
"Oolong tea…? (German)"
"Yep. Looks just like it, right?"
This is the essence of PAB!
Everything looks normal—but nothing's non-alcoholic!
One of the foreigners spotted the still-unput-away vodka and whiskey on the table.
Then looked at the "oolong tea" in front of him.
He... seemed to understand what this drink was made of now.
Did this have anything at all to do with tea?!
At that moment, he really wanted to throw this squinty-eyed guy into a real teahouse and show him what actual tea was!
Bang!
While the two were still trying to figure out the alcohol content of their drinks, a loud slam from across the table drew their attention.
They looked up to see two demon-like faces staring back, each holding an empty glass.
"Your turn, gentlemen~"
"It's just 'oolong tea'—you're not scared of that, are you~?"
Gulp
The two foreigners swallowed hard. For the dignity of the German people, they absolutely couldn't lose!
Just bluffing.
Yeah, it had to be bluffing!
Once they survived this round, those two would definitely start showing their true colors!
With that thought in mind, they once again downed their drinks in one gulp.
This time...
Their expressions began to twist.
This drink had an alcohol content close to 70%!
Clink~
As soon as they finished, the devil spoke again. "Here comes the next round: 'The Answer,' just for you two~"
The pear-shaped glasses were filled with clear liquid, topped with a touch of red bitters—like a seductive, barely-clothed succubus luring in her prey.
"..."
At that moment...
The two foreign guests went completely silent.
Because—
They saw the bottle next to the glass:
"96% Aqua Vitae."
A liquor they had heard of… but never dared to try.
Clearly, they still had no idea that the "hangover cure" they drank on the train was this exact stuff.
Or maybe they had passed out immediately and had no memory of that moment...
"Gentlemen, please~"
Shiro still wore that smiling face—but to the two foreigners, he might as well have grown horns and a tail.
What kind of monster makes cocktails with this stuff?!
He's a total demon!
"Is this even drinkable? (German)"
"If we both pass out after this, wouldn't it just be a draw? This is cheating! (German)"
That's right!
It had to be!
The swordsman-looking foreigner broke into a cold sweat, but the corners of his mouth curled up.
He got it—he totally understood now!
That squinty-eyed devil must've realized his teammate was reaching his limit and wanted to call it a draw.
Hah! Sneaky Japanese trickster!
The more he thought about it, the more confident he became.
He knew the truth!
There was no way they'd be steamrolled by two Japanese kids!
However...
"Sir, you're overthinking it~"
Gulp
Clink!
Two more empty glasses were set in front of them.
Iori and Kouhei now wore the same smug smiles the foreigners had earlier.
"To us at PAB, this stuff is called 'hangover water!'"
"Come on, don't chicken out now. We're just getting started!"
{{(°△°;")}}
Looking at the mocking expressions of the three Japanese and then at the hellish drink in front of them...
The foreigners finally realized the truth.
They were the underdogs.
From this moment on, they developed a deep, abiding fear of Japanese alcohol tolerance.
This isn't natural!!!
Bang!
In the end, even Deutschland couldn't defeat 96% alcohol. After chugging it down, both of them immediately passed out.
"They're true warriors too."
Seeing the miserable state of the two, Shiro couldn't help but sigh. After all, no sane person would down something called aqua vitae in one go—especially without ever having tasted it before.
"Still not enough, huh~"
"As expected, when it comes to drinking, we're still pab (top tier)!"
Having just downed a glass of aqua vitae themselves, Iori and Kouhei topped off another round, using the passed-out duo as a drinking mood enhancer.
"This reminds me of the first time we tried aqua vitae."
Shiro's words brought back nostalgic memories for the three of them.
They remembered—it was a bright and sunny afternoon, and the seniors were holding a welcome event.
The three of them handed each other a glass of "sobering water"...
"You bastards!!!" ×3
All three immediately recalled the nightmare and wished they could land a Rozan Rising Dragon Punch on each other.
It was totally the fault of those two bastards! ×3
"Enough, there's no point arguing over whose fault it was. We... can't go back anymore."
Hearing this, Iori and Kouhei silently looked down at their drinks.
Only now did they realize—they could now drink 96% alcohol without even flinching.
Truly... there was no going back.
They too had become the kind of weirdos that others whispered about. (?????)
Gulp!
The heartbroken pair downed their drinks in one shot again. After a moment of silence, they poured themselves another.
Fine—if there's no going back, so be it!
A few shots of ultra-high proof booze later, they were already starting to get hyped. One more drink and they'd enter full-on party mode.
Especially since both of them were now wearing nothing but underwear...
Even Shiro started to feel a bit tempted watching them drink, but the last shred of his reason held him back.
"Stop drinking for a second. Don't forget why we're here."
"Why we're here?"
"Wasn't it to stop those two perverts? They're lying here all nice and unconscious now."
Iori and Kouhei looked confused. Since the situation had been resolved, now should be the perfect time to crack open the victory booze, right?
"You two are real idiots."
Shiro sighed. Even now, they hadn't noticed what was off.
"Look, those two really love that anime character, right?"
"Yeah, no doubt."
"That kind of passion is admirable!"
The two nodded. They respected other people's passions—so long as those passions weren't perverted...
"And they're from the same club, here on a trip, right?"
The two nodded again. Carina had already told them about that on the train.
'Club… same interest…'
Kouhei seemed to realize something!
His face darkened. "You mean... Carina is one of them too?!"
"Exactly!"
Shiro gave him a "you finally get it" look. "People in the same club usually share the same interests. Using this simple formula, Carina must also be a pervert!"
This wasn't just intuition—it was scientific deduction!
"Objection!"
But Iori didn't agree with that conclusion.
"Oh?"
Shiro gave him a mocking look. "Are you questioning my formula?"
Formula: If most members of a club share the same interest, then it's safe to assume that the club revolves around that interest. Therefore, everyone in the club likely shares that interest!
While not airtight, this logic was sufficient for most cases!
Especially in cases involving perverted hobbies!
"Yeah! Your formula is way too absolute!"
Iori propped up his chin. He had a great counterexample ready.
"Chisa! Chisa clearly doesn't like drinking, yet she's in our club!"
"That proves members of a club don't all have to share the same hobby!"
Looking proudly at his drink, Iori felt a swell of pride at having come up with such a brilliant rebuttal.
As for why he didn't mention Aina?
Well, their first encounter with Aina involved heavy drinking, and in their minds, the Zombie Beast was clearly a fellow drunkard!
For a moment, Shiro was left speechless.
But then...
(???)
"Isn't it possible… that our club is actually called the Diving Club? And that our real hobby is diving…?"
′_>`
At that moment,
Iori went silent. It had been so long since he went diving that he had almost forgotten what kind of club they were.
Right. He'd originally come back to retrieve his passport so he could work at a dive shop overseas.
Looking at the drink in front of him, he started to question everything—when did he start thinking this was a drinking club?
"Well, that formula isn't absolute, of course."
Shiro tried to console Iori. Actually, if Iori had phrased it differently, he might've won.
After all, from a normal perspective, it was hard to see any hobby besides drinking that Iori and Kouhei shared...
Just like it was hard to tell if those two foreigners had any other common interests besides being freaks.
Still...
"You have to understand—they're perverts. I really can't imagine any other hobby that would make Carina willing to hang out with them despite social norms!"
He trusted his gut!
There was definitely something off about Carina!
"Ehhh... If you put it that way, yeah. Otherwise, there's no reason she'd hang out with those two."
Iori, who had been fixated on finding a loophole in the formula, finally realized something—he'd forgotten the most important premise. If those two were the template, then the formula totally held up!
"Right! Unless it's some kind of punishment game, no one would hang out with shut-in otakus like that!"
Even Kouhei agreed… but—
"You owe Chisa an apology right now."
"And me too, you bastard—apologize!"
Kouhei had totally forgotten—he was an otaku himself!
Like… right now, he was subconsciously hugging a body pillow.
If he wasn't a otaku, then who was?
Kouhei didn't seem bothered though, and instead was thinking back:
"Come to think of it, that pervert who was secretly filming people had a really slim figure… Doesn't match these two at all!"
"For real?"
Iori was shocked. Could it really have been Carina taking those secret photos?
She looked so quiet and refined...
Shiro rolled up his sleeves and walked over to the two drunk foreigners.
"Why don't we just ask them directly?"
#Bullying face activated
SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK!!!