An ordinary life means weakness… if you're weak, y… you die.'
He said it with those frightening eyes fixed on me in the dark. His voice was cold and rough.
I moved closer, every word edged with anger. 'I'd rather be weak than end up like you—a heartless bastard who takes orders from the Organisation like a robot.' I leaned in, snarling into his face in the dim bay. 'You're no different from a lapdog. Worse.'
He blinked, mock-surprised, eyes widening with a cruel sort of delight. 'All of this because of him? Sounds like you actually liked him.'
Shock punched through me; for a second my heart imploded. I couldn't feel my pulse. I stared, frozen, as the corner of his mouth hitched and he drawled, needling, 'Ah… so you loved him. Th… that's why you're so angry.'
I didn't look away. My hands were fists. The van's rattle and the grind of metal couldn't break my focus. I was locked on him, vision burning. My breath came in shards; fear crawled under my skin.
'None of your business, bastard,' I hissed, my voice shaking with hate.
He studied my face, inch by inch, then slowly wet his lips. 'Maybe if they hadn't cut out his tongue, he could've told me the "code" and saved himself… poor boy.'
I reeled. My head went heavy, like someone had piled a hundred kilos on my back. He'd seen Steven before he died? Ashur… could he have saved him?
'Y… you could've saved him and you said nothing?' I choked, pain ripping through my voice.
He narrowed his eyes and gave a small nod. 'Mm. The doctor said if I t… talked, he'd let the boy go. But the boy had lost his tongue. He couldn't say the activation code. Maybe he never had it at all… Either way, there was n… nothing I could do.' He dipped his head; his lips brushed the rim of my ear. 'Until the code was spoken, I… I couldn't save him. He didn't speak it. You did. He had to die—so you could live.'
'You… animal…' I breathed, teeth clenched, staring into the dark. I felt set alight—weightless, dragged towards a bloody black hole. No matter how I thrashed, it wouldn't stop.
Rage surged—hate and grief together. Steven's face flashed up—the moment he died, his sad eyes locked to mine.
Ashur was still bent to my ear when he murmured, 'He g… gave his life for the Organisation. At least he served better than y—'
I hit him like a bullet.
Ignoring the pain in my leg, I slammed into him and clawed for his throat, squeezing with both hands. I was all fury, no control—like my brain had cut out and the hatred was driving. 'I'll kill you!'
He met my glare and let out a harsh, amused snort. One hand knotted in my hair and forced my head back until my grip slipped from his neck. I smashed a fist into his cheek; he didn't budge—granite. He didn't strike back; he was containing me.
His other hand caught my wrist, twisted, and pinned it behind me. My spine hit his chest. He hauled me tighter and growled at my ear, 'Shh. Easy.'
Panting with rage, I tore my free arm loose and slammed an elbow into his ribs. He barely flinched, trapped that arm too, and wrenched both behind me. Before I could crack the back of my skull into his face, he dumped me to the floor; my cheek hit metal.
He planted a knee in my lower back and clamped both my wrists hard. Pain blazed. 'Let go,' I snarled through tears and grit.
He bore down, harder. Heat burned my frozen face; tears kept coming. Why couldn't I kill him? Why wouldn't this fury leave my body? How do you live with this much hate and grief?
'A… animal,' I rasped, voice strangled. I could hardly breathe; his knee ground into my spine and his grip crushed my wrists. It felt like the veins in my head might burst.
He leaned over me from behind, holding me down, his breath hot against my ear, scorching.
'If that code hadn't come out of your mouth,' he said, voice low, harsh, 'after what you pulled a minute ago, I'd have done something to you your little i… imagination couldn't begin to fathom. But for now, I'm forced to put up with your wild turns of temper.'
Face pressed to the floor, I spat, raw with loathing, 'I… hate you. I… hate you.'
He paused.
For a heartbeat, his breathing hitched.
Then his mouth drifted closer to my ear and, after a long, strange silence, he whispered, 'Then don't be weak. If you plan to kill me, you'll need to be stronger, Viuna. Because I'm not going to make it easy.'