"Okay, the rules are super simple: just kill the enemy king by any means. Each school picks one person from your own school to be the king. Oh, and you're allowed to use literally anything as long as you take out the king."
"Can we use a nuke?"
"Sure, as long as you're fine dying with them."
"Aww…"
Everyone from our school immediately turned to look at Harry.
"Nope, hard pass. I wanna fight on the front lines! Pick someone else!"
"But—"
"Find someone else. Peter, who do you think should do it?"
I scanned the crowd and my eyes landed on one guy.
"Ned, I choose you!"
"Huh?"
And just like that, Ned became our king.
Meanwhile, at Xavier's school:
"Me and Pietro will be the horse. You just ride us," Bobby said to Lee.
"What about Kitty?"
"She'll be the king. Someone like her probably can't fight anyway."
"I HEARD THAT!!" Kitty, who was struggling to climb onto a buff guy, yelled back.
"Is that okay?"
"YES BUT NO!"
"Ignore her. What do you think?" Bobby turned to Lee.
"What about the others? Who'd you pick?" Lee looked around.
"I didn't pick—big bro Scott did. He chose all the strongest ones to be horses. Oh, here he comes."
"Any problems, kids?" Scott walked up with a smile.
Even though Scott's the X-Men leader, he's still young—he became captain at 17 and was the most talented person at that age.
And thankfully, he doesn't have a girlfriend, and most importantly, it's definitely not Jean Grey.
And yes, he's participating too since he's a senior.
"Who'd you assign as riders, Scott?" Lee asked.
"Let me introduce them one by one. You're always cooped up in the lab, so you probably don't know anyone."
Scott started pointing people out.
"That's Megamin—er, I mean Megabrain, our strategist. Over there is Flame Mouth, he breathes fire by eating spicy stuff. And that's Morrigan—wait, Morrigan? Why is she even in this fic?"
"Wow, you picked a bunch of people I've literally never heard of."
"Don't underestimate them, they're all basically qualified to join the X-Men."
"Especially that guy," Scott pointed at a Black dude with a buzz cut.
"What about him?"
"If he develops properly, he'll be an Omega-level mutant. His power is Prime Body—he's invincible as long as he has enough fat."
"I-Invincible?! Like… the 'never wins' kind?!"
"Not that [title card], dummy—he literally cannot be defeated. You watch too much [title card]."
"But… what if he runs out of fat?" Bobby asked.
"That's why he's our trump card—only use him when absolutely necessary. We'll be the main fighting force."
"Especially you, Lee. Your damage output is the second highest after mine—and I don't even wanna use my power because it's too lethal," Scott said, patting Lee's shoulder.
"Oh, and… try to impress that Harry guy, yeah? He seems pretty hard to win over." Scott waved and walked off, leaving Lee a little flustered.
"I hope that Harry guy is as nice as he looks," Bobby sighed.
"Alright everyone, get ready! Use your powers freely, just don't kill anyone!" Scott shouted to his team. Everyone cheered in response.
Once every school was ready, war drums started pounding like a real battle was about to begin.
The whistle blew, then a loud horn blared.
Instantly, the once-green grassy field turned into a total wasteland.
"READY?!" the middle-aged host yelled.
"UOHH!!"
"Good! TOTAL WAR BETWEEN SCHOOLS! A SCHOOL IS ELIMINATED THE MOMENT ALL ITS MEMBERS OR ITS KING IS DEFEATED! NO OUTSIDE HELP—FREEDOM ABOVE ALL! AND SO… LET THE BATTLE BEGIN!!!"
Everyone roared. Instantly, all participating students charged.
And every single one of them was gunning for Peter's school.
"WHAT THE—?!" One student screamed as a swarm rushed him.
"YOU GUYS HAVE WON TOO MANY TIMES—NOW IT'S OUR TURN!!" shouted a guy with rainbow rooster hair.
They pulled out sticks and immediately knocked him down.
"Oh!! One of the 10 teams from that school has been taken out!"
(Quick reminder: 30 people = 10 teams of 3—2 guys, 1 rider. If the rider gets knocked to the ground, the whole team is out.)
"GAHAHA! THAT WAS NOTHING! VICTORY IS OURS!"
"You sure about that?"
"Huh— UWAAH!"
In a single swing, three entire teams from three different schools were sent flying into the air.
"W-What the—?!" The chubby guy from Fat School jolted in shock, only to get smacked into a trash can.
"OH!!! ONE TEAM JUST TOOK OUT THE ATTACKERS—AND WHO MIGHT THEY BE?!"
"Huff huff" — the horse panting.
"Hmph" — the rider wearing glasses, spinning his weapon.
"Aha!" — the weapon herself, clearly having fun.
That's right! It's Peter's team! Harry is the horse, Peter is the rider, and Gwen is the weapon!!
"What the hell is this?!" Bruce's eyes nearly popped out—he didn't expect Peter to go this far.
"General Peter… has taken the field!"
Peter spun Gwen around like a spear while Harry charged forward, wrecking anyone in their path.
"Brothers! Charge!" Students from 'Murica School rushed in, guns blazing.
Peter blocked every bullet by spinning Gwen like a helicopter blade!
"Kuh! You think we'll go down that easily?!" One guy pulled out a massive holy cross and swung it with all his might.
Peter blocked with Gwen—sparks flew everywhere when the two "weapons" clashed. (How?)
"Everyone! Send two teams to back me up—the rest protect Ned!"
"Yes, General Peter!"
Two teams rushed in, stabbing their spears into the cross guy's sides.
"Y-You bastards!"
"Get lost!" Harry stepped back for momentum, then charged. Peter delivered one devastating swing—sending the guy flying into the horizon.
"OH!!!! THAT TEAM IS UNSTOPPABLE!! WILL THIS SCHOOL KEEP WINNING?!"
Then, a very familiar tune started playing from the Weebs School side.
"Huh?" Everyone turned—and their eyes widened.
All 29 members had stacked themselves into a giant human tower. On top stood their king… with a very recognizable facial hair.
"Japan was once allied with Germany, so… Ich hoffe, dass niemand Deutsch versteht, sonst werden die mich noch wegen Betrugs anzeigen!!" he declared, raising his hand. A flag I really don't want to describe appeared behind him.
"Nazi bastards!! I knew from the start anime was never wholesome!! Sisters—CHARGE!!" The entire Rainbow Flag School rushed the Wibu tower.
"WO IST DIE ARTILLERIE?! BALLERT IHNEN DEN ARSCH ZERFICKEN!!" their king commanded.
Immediately, the human artillery unit transformed into tanks and started launching people as cannonballs.
"SHINZOU SASAGEYO!!" The Rainbow warriors charged anyway, completely unfazed.
…this chapter is absolutely batshit insane.
***
Also, I really like Invisigal from Dispatch—she's perfect.