I wasn't sure what surprised me more, that he actually asked, or that i said yes.
Maybe it was the way he asked, quietly, with the city lights casting soft shadows on his face.
Maybe it was how he avoided my eyes, like he wasn't sure if he was allowed to ask me anything personal or maybe it was just the way the cold air between our balconies carried his words gently enough to make me forget the weight of who we both were.
"You wanna go out sometime?"
The hesitation in his voice had made it sound almost unplanned.
Like he didn't mean to ask, but he did anyway.
And I, me, the girl who ran away from everything—nodded.
Now here i was.
Wearing my nicest neutral-toned coat, hair tied in a sleek ponytail, and yes, I ditched the hoodie.
I even wore a bit of lip gloss, just enough to not look like i tried.
Which, ironically, I did.
We wore masks.
Not because we had to, but because we knew better.
The world didn't let people like us move freely without a price.
And Sebastian, he couldn't afford one wrong headline.
He walked beside me, hands tucked inside his coat, baseball cap low.
But i could tell it was him.
Even under the layers and precautions, there was something magnetic about him like even when he tried to hide, he still stood out.
"So… what movie are we watching again?" I asked as we walked past a row of posters outside the theater.
He shrugged. "Something light. I figured we don't need anything deep tonight."
I laughed softly. "Afraid i'll cry?"
"No. Afraid i will."
The corner of my mouth curved up.
I liked this version of him.
Still polished, but loose at the edges.
Not an idol, not a celebrity. Just… Sebastian.
We didn't talk much inside the cinema.
I didn't even remember half of what the movie was about.
I was too aware of how close he sat beside me.
Too conscious of the space between our arms, the way his knee occasionally brushed against mine.
But we never crossed a line.
Not once.
Afterward, he asked if i wanted to take a longer way back.
"I know a quiet place," he said, eyes glinting under the streetlights. "No cameras. Just memories."
I agreed.
That's how we ended up in a playground.
It was past midnight, and the park was empty.
The lights were dim, casting long shadows across the sandbox and monkey bars.
There was an old swing set near the far end, slightly creaking from the wind.
I stared at it for a while.
"Did you ever get to play?" I asked.
Sebastian walked toward the swing set, tapping one of the chains lightly. "Yeah," he said. "When i was little. Like, really little."
"How little is 'little'?"
"Up until i turned seven."
He took a seat on one of the swings.
I joined him on the other.
"That's specific," I said.
He gave a small smile. "That's when i started training. Voice lessons, dance. We lived in China until i was five. Went back to the Philippines and by seven, I was already spending more time in rehearsal studios than in parks."
"Must've been a fancy childhood."
He let the swing move slowly beneath him. "It was… structured. Lavish, yes. But structured."
I nodded. "I didn't have one either."
He looked at me. "Structured childhood?"
I shook my head. "Childhood at all."
He didn't say anything.
Just kept listening.
"I started acting when i was five. Commercials, then teleseryes. I memorized lines before i even learned division. My yaya would take me to shoots straight from school or sometimes, I'd skip school entirely. I didn't mind. I loved it. At least i thought i did."
He was quiet for a moment. "And now?"
I tilted my head back, staring at the sky.
"Now i don't know what i love. That's the thing about growing up in the spotlight. You confuse applause for affection. Attention for acceptance and then one day, when everything goes silent… you realize you don't even know who you are without it."
Sebastian didn't interrupt. He just let me talk.
"I never played," I said softly. "Not really. No cousins. No siblings. And even if i did have them, I wouldn't know what to do. I was always working. Always proving something."
We sat there for a few more minutes.
Just the occasional creak of the swings and the wind rustling through the trees.
"I guess we missed the same things," he said.
"Maybe that's why we ended up here."
I glanced at him.
He wasn't looking at me, but there was a soft smile on his lips.
One that made my chest feel… light. Unsafe. Like i was tiptoeing on the edge of something i couldn't name.
"This is strange," I whispered.
"What is?"
"You. Me. This."
"Yeah," he said, exhaling slowly. "But… good strange."
I nodded.
We stopped by a convenience store on the walk back.
He bought milk tea, I bought chips.
We didn't talk about deep things anymore.
Just debated which flavor was better, who had better acting skills, and why he thinks I'm secretly funny.
"You laugh at my jokes," he said as we reached the elevator.
"I laugh at how bad they are," I teased.
"Same thing."
We both stepped in.
The elevator closed, and silence filled the small space again.
But it wasn't awkward.
Just… careful.
He pressed the button for our floor.
"You okay?" he asked quietly.
I nodded. "Yeah. This was nice."
He gave a small smile. "I'm glad you came."
There was a pause.
Then, right before the elevator stopped, he said, "We should do it again."
I looked at him.
"Yeah," I replied. "We should."
Ding.
I stepped out and turned. "Goodnight, Sebastian."
"Goodnight, Margaux."
The door slid shut between us.
And for the first time in a long time, my heart didn't feel heavy.
Not confused.
Not lost.
Just quietly… okay.