(Yuuta Kounari's POV)
Have you ever heard of the legendary war between dragons and humans?
You're probably imagining blazing skies, shattered mountains, kingdoms reduced to ashes.
Well… today's war is far worse.
Because today's war is happening in my living room.
And the reason?
A remote.
Yep. The TV remote.
Standing across from me is my fearsome opponent:
Erza, Queen of the Atlantis Kingdom. Proud. Powerful. Completely unreasonable.
And also… my wife.
She's strong, she's proud, and she's crazy as hell.
But I won't back down.
Not today.
Not when the remote is on the line.
"You better give up, my dear wife," I said, cracking my knuckles with the confidence of a man who's never won a single argument.
Erza narrowed her eyes, her voliet pupils glowing slightly.
"Ha! That was my line, mortal."
"Today, I will claim the remote. Step aside."
"Step aside? I am the Queen of the Atlantis Kingdom! I fear no one!"
"You don't know who I am!" I yelled. "I once turned a whole shark into soup!"
"Soup?" she scoffed. "Child's play. I slaughtered an entire nation just to carve my name in history."
"You evil dragon."
"You pathetic human."
We both stared each other down.
Silence.
Tension.
And then—
"LET'S BATTLE!!" we both roared.
"Stone!" I shouted.
"Paper!" she yelled.
"Scissors!" we said at the same time.
I proudly held up rock.
She showed scissors.
My eyes widened.
"I WON!!! I WON!!! TODAY I RULE THE TV!!" I screamed, doing a little victory dance that would've made ancient warriors weep.
"No! It can't be! How did I lose to you?!" she said, gripping her head like she'd just lost her crown.
"I won!" I jumped into the air, spinning like I just landed a promotion. "I finally get to watch my show tonight! Victory is mine! HAHAHA!"
"You switched mid-throw!" she snapped.
"Strategic adaptation," I grinned. "Don't be a sore loser, Lizard Queen."
"Accept it!" I grinned. "You can't beat me, you overgrown lizard!"
Her smile twitched. A dangerous aura surrounded her.
"You did not just call me a lizard."
"Oh, I did. Erza the Lizard Queen."
That was it.
"I've had enough!" she snapped. "Ice Veil!"
With a flick of her finger, a sparkling blue magic bullet hit me square in the chest.
"Wait—hold on—wait a sec—"
I looked down. My feet. My legs. My whole body was turning to ice.
"You absolute cheater! This is foul play!"
"Don't worry," she said sweetly. "Only your body will freeze. Your head will remain free… for conversation."
"That's worse!"
"You Cheater."
"I can't hear losers," she said, pretending to clean her ear.
But just as my legs started freezing, I lunged forward and grabbed her in a tight hug.
"If I'm going down…" I whispered in her ear, "I'm taking you with me."
"Yuuta—no! Don't you dare—!"
I wrapped my arms around her in a tight hug closing my eye. She scream like she is falling.
"You absolute IDIOT—LET GO OF ME!" she shouted.
ZAAAP.
We both froze instantly.
Now we stood in the middle of the living room…
Two frozen statues.
Locked in a tight hug.
Only our heads free to move.
Frozen.
Literally.
In the center of our living room, locked in a dramatic hug.
My arms wrapped tightly around Erza, her magic backfiring thanks to my last-minute "if-I-go-down-you're-coming-with-me" move.
Our bodies? Solid ice.
Only our heads were unfrozen, left to suffer and argue in what can only be described as the most uncomfortable victory ever.
Erza's eyes were locked onto mine.
Fuming. Furious. Frozen.
"This is all your fault," she hissed, her breath fogging in the cold air.
"My fault? You're the one who blasted me with Ice Veil! I was just trying to win a fair rock-paper-scissors match!"
"Fair?" She snorted. "You switched to scissors mid-round, you lying shrimp."
Every cheater say this once they lost game.i said
"Don't breathe so close to me," she muttered, disgusted.
"What?"
"You're fogging up my face. You make me feel sick."
"This is all your fault, you cold-blooded lizard!"
"What did you just call me?!"
"HA! You can't even hit me now. We're both frozen!"
She wanted to respond, but we were interrupted by the sound of soft footsteps.
Little ones.
"Papa? Mama?"
Elena peeked into the living room, holding her dragon plushie in one hand, the other hand rubbing her sleepy eyes.
"What are you both doing?"
We turned our heads in unison—literally the only part of our bodies we could move.
I tried to keep a straight face. "It's nothing, sweetheart. Mama and Papa were just… checking how it feels to be statues."
Erza gave a very stiff nod. "Yes. A bonding ritual. Very... ancient."
Elena blinked, squinting at us like she wasn't fully buying it. "Really?"
"Absolutely," I said with fake confidence. "Great way to build trust in marriage."
She tilted her head. Then suddenly smiled. "Okay then! Remote!"
Our eyes widened at the exact same time.
"No no no—Elena, wait!" I shouted.
"Don't you dare touch that, young lady!" Erza added.
But of course…
Elena has a special trait.
She only listens if someone physically taps her shoulder or tugs her sleeve.
And well… we were very much incapable of doing either.
She walked straight past us without a care in the world, picked up the remote from the floor, and proudly plopped herself on the couch.
Click.
The screen lit up.
The theme song echoed across the room:
"Draaaagon Boyyyy~ Let's soar into the skyyy~!"
I felt my soul shatter.
"No… not Dragon Boy… anything but Dragon Boy…"
For the next two hours, Erza and I—two of the most powerful beings in the house (and possibly the world)—were forced to watch a sparkly, high-pitched, musical baby dragon teach kids about kindness, sharing, and cloud-shaped cookies.
No battle. No drama. Just nonstop glitter and songs.
"My ears are melting," I whispered.
"I've defeated demon kings," Erza muttered, eyes hollow. "And yet… here I am."
"Please… someone change the channel…"
Elena turned around and beamed. "Look, Papa! Dragon Boy is helping the flower learn self-confidence!"
I gave up.
End of Chapter.