Sam entered Dr. Ellis' office, visibly distressed.
Dr. Ellis: Have a seat, Sam. I can see that there's a lot on your mind. Let's take a deep breath like we practiced, and we can start whenever you're ready.
Sam (takes a deep breath): It's my ex. I just…hate him so much. There's so much anger in me, and I just can't let it go.
Dr. Ellis: I see. Most of our sessions revolve around how he makes you feel. How about we dive deeper into this?
Sam (nods): Yes, please. Hate to see him with some other broad, knowing he's happy. I hate seeing him happy if I'm not doing it.
Dr. Ellis: Breakups are rough. Wounds tend to open up more if closure was never had, so I understand and recognize the hurt you feel from seeing your ex move on.
Sam: It's more than that. He should be with me and only me.
Sam giggled strangely.
Sam (to herself): I'm so mature. I'm so mature.
Dr. Ellis (reflective): Can you admit that you are struggling with jealousy?
Sam (sighs):I just wish I didn't love him so much. How could he envision a future without me?
Dr. Ellis: It's important to remember that you deserve happiness too. Other men in the world can treat you the way you want to be treated, Sam.
Sam (giggles): I'm so mature that I got myself a therapist to tell me there are other men, but I don't want anyone, Doc; I just want him. I feel like if I can't have him, no one should.
Sam paused and stared at her hands, which began to shake.
Sam (nervous): So, there's something that's weighing heavy on my mind.
Dr. Ellis: I'm here to help you unload burdens, Sam. My job is to make you feel lighter after every session.
Sam (takes a deep breath): I've had many dark thoughts about my ex. Many, many dark thoughts.
Dr. Ellis (concerned): Can you describe these dark thoughts?
Sam (voice shaking): I've... I've thought about killing him. Not the best idea.
Sam's hands continued to shake.
Sam: His new girlfriend's next, Doc, how'd I get here?
Dr. Ellis(takes a moment to process): That must have been a tough one to admit. Have you shared these thoughts with anyone else?
Sam(nods, tears welling in her eyes): No. I don't share anything with anyone but you. I thought talking to you would help.
Dr. Ellis (tries to remain calm): I'm glad you decided to tell me, Sam. This way, we can unpack everything, hoping those thoughts will lessen or even stop before they escalate.
Sam (desperation in her eyes): It's just… I still love him, though. I'd rather be in jail than alone. I'm a terrible person for feeling this way. I know I am.
Dr. Ellis (choosing his words carefully): It's essential, Sam, that we find healthier ways to cope with our emotions. Let's work together to find a solution.
Sam (her voice trembling): I got the sense that it was a lost cause. I got the feeling that he might have really loved her.
Dr. Ellis (furrows his brow): You sound like you're drowning, Sam. How does peace look if you're just consumed by your ex?
Sam (ignores his question): I've texted him, trying to make sense of it all. He read it and never responded. He kept his read receipts on to let me know he was reading everything I sent him. He must have still loved me, right? He was so close, but he was out of reach.
Dr. Ellis: In our search for healthy ways to cope with things that don't fuel the soul, fixating on someone who isn't giving you the attention will prevent you from finding peace, Sam. You understand that, right?
Sam pulled out her phone and began to scroll.
Sam (mumbles to herself): The text is going to be evidence; this text is evidence. I tried to ration with you, no murders or crimes of passion, but damn.
Dr. Ellis: What did you say, Sam?
Sam: Just thinking to myself, Doc.
Dr. Ellis: Taking a step back from reaching out gives you space to focus on yourself.
Sam (bites her lip): I've tried, but I used to always run into them. Last week, I saw them at the farmer's market; she looked perfect, like a sunbathed peach.
Dr. Ellis (nods understandingly): I see how hard it would be to move on from your ex when you constantly see them around town. It's hard to get over something that's always in your face. It's like temptation. After you saw them at the farmer's market, what did you do to find a calm body?
Sam: I went home and headed to my basement. I used to drink heavily, but I stopped that because it always clouded my judgment. Music helps me relax and focus, so I had it on shuffle. I began to plan something.
Dr. Ellis: I'm glad you don't turn to alcohol as a vice. I've seen people spiral when turning to the bottle. Getting lost in projects can help you forget what's bothering you, keeping your mind occupied. What were you planning?
Sam: Just planned a meet between my ex and…her.
Dr. Ellis: A meet?
Sam (deep breath): I just wanted to make them understand, you know? The pain I felt… I just wanted them to feel it.
Dr. Ellis: Acting on such impulses only brings more pain, Sam.
Sam: It brought closure.
Dr. Ellis: You mean, would bring closure? That's a dark and lonely path of regret, Sam.
Sam: Well, the thing is, Doc, this path I'm on is illuminated with relief.
Dr. Ellis began to sweat as he became increasingly uncomfortable with each passing moment.
Sam: I did it all for love. I did it all on no drugs. I did all of this sober. I did it all for us.
Dr. Ellis (scared): What did you do, Sam?
Sam: I tried to make him realize I wanted to love him for life. I tried to make him see that he was the only one for me.
Dr. Ellis: Sam…
Sam: I was willing to give him things he never had before and so much more. I was willing to go as far as I needed to make him see.
Dr. Ellis: Sam…
Sam: As I was driving, I saw him going for a night run, so I parked and waited by bushes near his home. I was just going to pop up to talk. I just wanted to talk.
Dr. Ellis closed his notepad as fear started to take over his body.
Sam: As he ran past me, I popped out of the bushes, but my mind was flooded with anger because look what he was making me do just to talk! Why would he make me do this? Why couldn't he just speak to me?
Dr. Ellis (to himself): The stabbings on Spruce Street?
Sam: I crept up from behind with every intention of taking his life. I caught him slipping, and my knife went deep. He laid there face down.
Sam's entire body at this point was shaking uncontrollably on the couch.
Sam: I did this for you.
Dr. Ellis: I…
Sam: Don't you know I did it all for us? I just killed my ex. Not the best idea. Killed his girlfriend next, Doc, how'd I get here?
Dr. Ellis slowly reached for his phone in his pocket.
Dr. Ellis: Did you actually kill them?
Sam: I still love him, though. Rather be in hell than alone.
Sam stood up and pulled a concealed knife behind her as Dr. Ellis struggled to gather his phone.
Sam: Now, there's only one thing to do. You're the only witness, so I have to kill you.
Sam lunged at Dr. Ellis and began to stab him.
Sam (as she stabs him): I did it all for us. I did it all for love.
As the stabbing continued, a plaque fell to the ground, displaying, "Dr. Bill Ellis."
Sam: Don't you know I did it all for us?