Though it happened just this morning, when recalled, it felt like more than a month had passed.
Masuzu woke from a nightmare.
She couldn't remember what the nightmare was about, only that she screamed, "Don't!" as her eyes snapped open.
She was drenched in cold sweat, lying in bed trembling like a child frightened by a ghost story. She didn't even have the strength to get up and turn on the light. The tips of her limbs were cold to the point of numbness.
It was just a nightmare. Once she calmed down, everything would be fine—she comforted herself like that. She stared blankly at the 6:00 AM on the clock, watching time crawl by.
Seven o'clock, eight…
Her phone rang several times. She didn't know who was calling, nor when she turned it off.
Nine o'clock, ten…
By noon, her stomach sent painful hunger signals, like cramps. Her mouth, without a drop of water, was so dry that even breathing felt torturous. Her lips must have been cracked and pale, unfit for anyone to see.
The aftereffects of the nightmare lingered, like a curse of unknown origin.
Masuzu slowly sat up in bed. That simple movement drained the energy she'd gathered over six hours. She could only lean against the headboard, slightly panting. With her silver hair dull and lusterless, she looked like a lonely, gravely ill elderly person, uncared for.
"Flu? Fever? Influenza? It can't be cancer, can it… It'd be better if this were a side effect of awakening a Stand."
She wanted to laugh heartily to ease her sorrow, but no sound came out except a hoarse sigh.
Swallowing thin saliva with difficulty, she moistened her lips, feeling slightly better.
"Today's November 13…"
Slowly moving her eyes, Masuzu looked at the clear, elegant blue sky outside the window. She began to recall and ponder what crime she'd committed before today to end up in this state.
Leaving Sweden to meet her mother, quietly waiting in this apartment.
To prevent her father from having a reason to drag her back, she played the role of a beautiful half-blood princess returning from abroad, behaving well at school.
To deal with the endless troublesome suitors, she planned to find someone as a fake boyfriend to act as a shield, but she never acted on it for various reasons.
She hadn't hurt anyone or interfered with anyone's interests. She only lived in solitude and humility, wanting nothing but a peaceful school life—
If so, why had she become such a mess? Should she say this was her own doing?
A feeling of complaint and reluctance welled up from deep within her heart. Masuzu took a deep breath. She forced her weak body to push aside the blanket and shift to the edge of the bed. She moved like a rusty machine, stepping onto the cold floor with bare feet.
She wasn't afraid of the cold. Japan was far warmer than Sweden. November's temperature wasn't enough to make her turn on the heater.
Yet, for some reason, the cold seeped into her body through her soles, piercing her nerves, making her unconsciously grab the dusty remote and turn on the air conditioner's heating function.
"Haaah…"
Sitting on the edge of the bed, looking at the distance from the bed to the door, Masuzu felt for the first time that her house was so vast. So vast that it would take dozens of minutes to leave the room.
But she had to take care of herself.
She had to be strong enough not to need anyone's protection, not to cry anymore.
…Who said that to her? Her mother?
Of course, there was no one but her mother.
The person she loved, and who loved her, in this world, was only her mother.
She asked and answered herself. Masuzu dragged her weak steps, slowly leaving the room. She slowly washed her face with warm water. She didn't brush her teeth or comb her hair. She returned to the room with water stains on her face.
She was hungry and thirsty. But strangely, she had no appetite at all. She only managed a few drops of water, as if her body rejected any action that would keep her alive.
"How funny. Since when did I want to die like this…"
Lying on the bed, she stared at the ceiling with empty eyes. The white light slowly spread into a fog in her dizziness. She could almost see the dead JoJo characters waving at her.
Mr. Zeppeli, Caesar, Kakyoin, Shigechi, Bucciarati…
"It must be because of the nightmare."
Closing her eyes, she let her body temperature drain from her hollow chest. Even with the heater on, it couldn't provide much warmth.
It was as if the pillar supporting her life had suddenly vanished from her existence. As if betrayed by the thing she trusted most. A feeling like the sky collapsing, turning her life into black and white…
"…I see."
She must have dreamed that her mother had an accident.
Because it was too sad, too painful, she didn't want to remember it. Only her body retained the pain, as if her heart were torn and her chest split open.
Masuzu felt a bit relieved.
It was certain, because she knew her mother must be fine, working hard to live in a place she didn't know.
As a tool to keep her obedient, even if her father didn't want to, he would protect her mother's safety as much as possible.
So, what Masuzu feared wasn't the content of the nightmare.
Rather, she didn't know why she'd become so despairing like this.
With the relief she believed was the answer, she let the pale light carry her consciousness away. She fell back into a deep sleep.
"You… You said you wouldn't leave me…"
She struggled to reach out to the sky. She woke in front of the window under a gloomy night.
Her hand faced the clean ceiling, clenching twice as if grasping at something empty. Then she weakly covered her forehead.
She forgot what she'd just murmured. She let the wet sensation spread from her cheek to behind her ear. Masuzu stared blankly into the void ahead, like a beautifully carved statue covered in dust.
After a long time, she quietly propped herself up and went to the bathroom to wash her face.
The time showed six in the evening. She'd regained more energy than twelve hours ago. Though the hunger and thirst were stronger, she could at least walk normally around the house.
She turned off the faucet. She looked at herself in the mirror. Her pale, disheveled face was expressionless. Her eyes were dark, as if she were an empty shell that only knew how to function on principle, having lost its most vital core.
"Is this what they call the Natsukawa family's jewel? How ridiculous."
Though she mocked herself like that, no ripples stirred in her heart.
Masuzu returned to her room. She glanced at her phone with its dark screen. She didn't check the messages that might have come from her teacher or father. She walked to the bookshelf and randomly picked a volume of JoJo.
When she was sad, lonely, or confused, she always relied on this manga to support herself. She mocked the fate that slept like a slave alongside its characters. Rather than being a caged princess, complaining all day and hoping for a prince to change her life.
It was the same now. Though the nightmare's impact was immense, as long as she read a few volumes of JoJo, she'd surely return to normal soon.
But as Masuzu sat at the desk and opened the first volume of JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Stone Ocean, the doorbell rang.
She looked up in confusion but quickly lowered her gaze back to the manga—she didn't want to meet anyone right now.
Besides her mother, she wouldn't open the door for anyone.
"…I'll consider calling the police and asking the property staff to open the door."
"Tch."
The corners of her lips twitched slightly. She put the book down in frustration. To avoid trouble, Masuzu could only walk to the door. She unlatched the chain. Hiding behind the crack of the door, she reflexively showed a cold, piercing smile.
"Yukinoshita? Heh, how rare…"
Then, her eyes met a pair that were unfamiliar yet somehow felt familiar.
At that moment, she seemed to hear someone whisper softly and resignedly in her ear:
"Because I'm not here, you have to take good care of yourself."
—But because you're not here, I'm no longer my complete self.