Eun Byol ran.
The forest blurred around her in streaks of green and brown and gold, trees bleeding into one another as her feet pounded the mud in rhythm that had no end, no pause, just forward and forward and forward.
Her lungs burned.
Each breath scraped her throat raw.
The black tracksuit clung to her like a second skin, wet and suffocating, the fabric grinding against her shoulders and thighs with every stride until her skin turned red, then pinkish, raw and tender beneath the soaked material.
Sweat poured down her face.
Her neck.
Her back.
It stung her eyes and she blinked hard but it kept coming, hot and relentless, mixing with the dampness of her hair that had darkened from brown to black, plastered against her skull and neck like paint.
Her chest heaved.
Too fast.
Too shallow.
Her heart hammered against her ribs like it wanted out.
---
*Stage lights explode overhead.*
*Blinding white and gold.*
*Four girls beside her in perfect formation.*
*All smiling.*
*All flawless.*
*Music pounding through the floor, through her bones.*
*The crowd roars.*
*"Eun Byol! Eun Byol! Eun Byol!"*
*Her name like thunder.*
*She spins.*
*Moves.*
*Hands in perfect position.*
*Smile locked in place.*
*The cameras flash.*
*Hundreds of them.*
*Thousands.*
*She can't see past the lights.*
*Can't see anything but brightness.*
---
She stumbled over a root.
Caught herself.
Kept running.
Her skin screamed where the tracksuit rubbed.
Raw.
Burning.
The mud grabbed at her feet with every step, sucking at her shoes, pulling her down, but she tore free again and again and again.
---
*Dressing room.*
*Mirror ringed with bulbs.*
*Her manager stands behind her, tall and thin, circular glasses reflecting the lights, his long skeletal fingers adjusting her hair strand by strand until it sits perfectly.*
*"Your father called again."*
*Eun Byol's reflection stares back.*
*Hollow.*
*"What did he say?"*
*"He wants the numbers from last week's fan meeting."*
*Silence.*
*The manager's hand moves to her shoulder, squeezes once.*
*"You're doing well. Keep losing weight. The camera loves thin."*
*He sets down a bottle of water.*
*Nothing else.*
*No food.*
*Just water.*
*"Tomorrow's schedule starts at three-thirty AM. Sleep if you can."*
*He leaves.*
*The door clicks shut.*
*Eun Byol stares at herself.*
*Perfect makeup.*
*Perfect hair.*
*Empty eyes that don't belong to her anymore.*
---
Her vision swam.
The trees tilted sideways and she blinked hard, forced them straight, kept moving even though her legs felt like they were made of wet sand, heavy and collapsing inward with every step.
Her breathing turned ragged.
Sharp gasps that didn't fill her lungs.
---
*Practice room.*
*Mirrors on every wall reflecting her four times over, eight times, infinite versions of herself all moving in sync.*
*The instructor claps.*
*"Again."*
*They start from the top.*
*Hours blend into each other.*
*Her feet bleed inside her shoes but she doesn't stop, can't stop, the music plays and she moves and spins and smiles even though her ankles scream and her calves cramp and her toes go numb.*
*"Again."*
*"Again."*
*"Perfect. Almost perfect. Again."*
---
Eun Byol's legs shook.
She pushed harder.
Faster.
Her feet slammed into the mud and she barely felt it anymore, just kept moving, kept chasing the red tracksuit ahead that never slowed, never stopped, never tired.
---
*Green room before a live broadcast.*
*The other girls laugh about something she didn't hear.*
*Eun Byol sits in the corner, knees pulled to her chest, staring at the wall.*
*One of them turns.*
*"You okay?"*
*Eun Byol looks up.*
*Smiles.*
*"I'm fine."*
*The girl's eyes linger for a moment, uncertain, then she turns back to the others.*
*The door opens.*
*"Two minutes."*
*Eun Byol stands.*
*Checks her reflection one last time.*
*Perfect.*
*Always perfect.*
*Never enough.*
---
Her heart was too fast now, hammering so hard it felt like it would crack her ribs from the inside, and her vision darkened at the edges, the forest closing in like a tunnel, and the sunlight was too bright, stabbing through the canopy in golden spears that hurt to look at.
She ran faster.
Harder.
Her legs barely responded but she forced them forward, faster, faster, mud flying up behind her, sweat pouring, chest heaving, skin screaming.
---
*Her father's voice on the phone.*
*"The new contract is good. More appearances. More money."*
*Eun Byol holds the phone to her ear.*
*Says nothing.*
*"You need to smile more. The fans like it when you smile."*
*Silence.*
*"Are you listening to me?"*
*"Yes."*
*"Good. Don't waste this. Don't disappoint me."*
*The line goes dead.*
*Eun Byol sets the phone down slowly, carefully, like it might shatter.*
*Stares at the wall.*
*White.*
*Blank.*
*Empty.*
---
Her legs buckled.
She didn't feel it happen.
One moment she was running and the next her knees hit the mud hard, the impact jolting through her bones, and her hands slammed down next, mud splashing cold and wet against her palms, and she tried to push herself up but her arms gave out and she collapsed forward, face-first into the soft dark earth.
The mud was cold against her cheek.
Almost gentle.
Her chest rose and fell in shallow, broken gasps.
Her eyes stayed open.
Staring at nothing.
---
Ha Joon saw her fall.
His body moved before his mind caught up.
"Help!"
The word tore from his throat, raw and desperate, and he didn't recognize his own voice as he screamed it again.
"Help her!"
Chi-Long was ahead, far but still visible, a flash of red between the trees.
She stopped.
The forest went silent.
The sunlight dimmed.
Ha Joon looked up.
The clouds had returned, thick and gray and white, rolling in from nowhere, swallowing the brightness piece by piece until the forest turned cold and shadowed.
Then the rain came.
Soft at first.
Gentle.
A few drops hitting the leaves with quiet taps.
Then more.
Steady.
Cool.
It pattered against the canopy, against the mud, against Eun Byol's still body.
Ha Joon stumbled forward and dropped to his knees beside her, his arms wrapping around her shoulders like a blanket, pulling her up slightly, cradling her against his chest.
Her head lolled back.
Her eyes were half-open.
Unfocused.
Her brown hair, now black with sweat and rain, clung to her face.
Her skin was pale.
Too pale.
"Eun Byol," he whispered.
She didn't respond.
His hands shook.
Fear.
Confusion.
Sadness.
All of it painted across his face.
---
A beam of light broke through the clouds.
Golden.
Singular.
It cut through the forest like a stage spotlight and landed directly on Chi-Long.
She stood twenty meters away, perfectly still, her red tracksuit vivid against the gray-green forest, her black ponytail hanging straight and perfect, her lips blood-red even in the dim light.
Her dark eyes reflected nothing.
Consumed everything.
She looked at them.
At Ha Joon kneeling in the mud.
At Eun Byol collapsed in his arms.
Then she moved.
Slowly.
Her feet made no sound in the mud at first, just the soft impression of weight, but as she stepped out of the golden light and into the shadow, each step began to echo.
Squelch.
Squelch.
Squelch.
Louder than it should have been.
Deliberate.
She walked closer.
Closer.
Her face unreadable.
Not angry.
Not concerned.
Just watching.
Measuring.
Ha Joon held Eun Byol tighter.
His breath came in shallow gasps.
He didn't know what to say.
Didn't know what to do.
Chi-Long stopped in front of them.
Looked down.
The rain fell around her.
She didn't blink.
Didn't move.
Just stood there.
Silent.
Watching.
Waiting.