CHAPTER THREE
Quinn woke up to someone throwing a bucket of water at his face.
He sputtered, soaked and shivering. "What the hell?!"
A boy sneered down at him, tall, sharp-jawed, and clearly enjoying himself. "Rise and shine, pig-boy. You think you get to sleep in just because you smell like ten kinds of death?"
[Ding! New Entity Identified: Lin Fei – Outer Disciple, Minor Bully, Major Insecurity Issues. Estimated Threat Level: Mild Head Trauma.]
Quinn wiped water from his face. "You could've just tapped me, you know."
"Just doing my part," Lin Fei said with a grin. "Outer sect tradition. Newbies get the boot."
Behind him, a few others chuckled.
Quinn sat up slowly. His whole body still hurt from yesterday's Boarageddon. "Cool. Well, tradition sucks."
[Emotional Frustration: +4 SP]
Lin Fei leaned closer. "You'll learn your place. Keep your head down, stay out of our way, and maybe you'll live long enough to sweep latrines for the next five years."
Quinn stared at him, then smiled sweetly. "Thanks for the advice, Discount Villain #3 but you're the one that came to me.. ."
"…What?"
[Ding! Passive Skill Activated: 'Insult Timing' – Adds +10% sass effectiveness when low on energy.]
Lin Fei's face twisted. "You've got a death wish, don't you?"
"Not really," Quinn said, standing slowly.
He didn't see the punch coming.
Pain exploded across his cheek. He hit the floor, tasting dirt. Then the kicks started. Lin Fei's friends joined in laughing, cursing, stomping.
Quinn curled into a ball. He didn't even fight back. Not because he was that weak…though he absolutely was but because…
[SP Gained: +132]
[Pain Multiplier: Humiliation x1.2]
[Bonus: Outnumbered + Bleeding Gums = +27 SP]
[Current SP: 306]
[Congratulations, Host! You have reached Suffering Tier 2.]
New Technique Unlocked: Endure and Absorb (Passive)
Minor external injuries convert into physical defense over time
+5% injury resistance per 100 SP held
Mood: Permanently pissed off (optional)
Quinn coughed blood, smiled through a cracked lip, and whispered, "Thanks, losers."
He passed out before they could ask what he meant.
He woke up hours later behind the stables again, face swollen, ribs bruised, soul annoyed.
[Rise and grind, Host! Pain builds character, and you're nearly a demigod in that department!]
"I'm dying."
[Technically, no. But your nose is now slightly left of center. Would you like to reset facial symmetry?]
"…You can do that?"
[No.]
System Status – Display Mode: Activated
NAME: Quinn
SPECIES: Human Fungus (☹️)
REALM: Mortal – Pre-Foundation
SUFFERING POINTS (SP): 306
CURRENT STATE: Bruised, Unloved, Slightly Deranged
PASSIVE SKILLS:
• Sarcastic Commentary (Lv. 1)
• Turd Sense (Lv. 1)
• Pain-Forged Body – Stage 1
• Endure and Absorb – Tier 2
• Insult Timing (Lv. 1)
PENDING QUESTS:
▪ Slap Elder Feng and shout "I claim your Qi!" – Reward: Random Technique Scroll
▪ Survive One Week – Reward: Real Cultivation Manual
▪ Bonus Side Mission: Publicly humiliate yourself in front of the entire canteen – Reward: Unknown, High SP Potential
That night, Quinn limped toward the sect's food hall.
The air smelled like boiled despair.
Long tables stretched across the cavernous space, filled with outer disciples laughing, eating, and bragging about how many spirit beasts they'd slaughtered.
Quinn held his wooden tray.
One half-rotted potato. Two slices of tofu that might've once known flavor. And of course no water.
He sat in the far corner, alone, ignored, invisible.
[Ding! Side Mission Reminder: Public Humiliation – High SP Reward Potential
Objective: Do something so cringe the entire hall notices you.]
Quinn exhaled. "Like what? Strip and sing a love ballad?"
[Option Selected.]
"…You're kidding."
[Would you like to activate 'Auto-Performance Mode'? Includes dramatic echo effect.]
He looked down at his tray. The food tasted like sadness. His ribs ached. His life was a joke.
But the thought of that next skill... of power...
"Fine," he whispered. "Screw it."
He stood.
He walked to the center of the hall.
Then, arms wide, voice cracking, Quinn began to sing:
"Youuuu left me for dead, and I smelled like a pig…
But now I'm reborn with trauma and a broken wig..
Cultivation won't save me, but sarcasm might..
So come at me, fate 'cause I'm ready to fight!"
There was total silence.
Dozens of disciples stared.
A cup clattered to the floor. Someone dropped a bun.
Elder Feng stood at the doorway, blinking.
[SP Gained: +290]
[Bonus: Performance Debuff x2 + Social Death = +98]
[New Passive Unlocked: "Shameless Heart" – Immune to embarrassment-based SP loss.
Side Effect: Everyone hates you 12% more.]
Then Quinn bowed.
"Thank you. You've been a terrible audience."
He returned to his seat, popped the tofu in his mouth, and smiled.
[You now have enough SP to unlock an active technique.]
[Choose Your Reward:
A. Spirit Pulse Strike (offensive skill – costs pain to activate)
B. Endure Reversal (convert incoming damage into counterattack)
C. Grovel Dodge (dodge automatically when hit below the belt)]
Quinn stared at the options.
"…System?"
[Yes, Fungus?]
"I'm going to burn this sect to the ground someday."
[With pleasure.]