"What are you waiting for?"
"What am I waiting for..." I mechanically repeated the question, as if it were a password to the subconscious. "I don't know."
"No. You know, you just... don't want to accept it. How convenient to hide behind 'I don't know' when you actually know everything down to the smallest detail. When the heart decided long ago, and the brain is simply ashamed to admit this decision."
"I won't go against the others, even if it costs me my life..." I say, as if this is something noble. Though in reality it's just exhaustion. "I've had enough of this. Why must we always make only such decisions?!"
"Because your fate depends on it!" The voice sounded as if it were beating its forehead against the walls of my logic. "Or are you suggesting another option?"
In my head only emptiness... this phrase is the only thing I could offer. But I won't commit murder. Not for anything.
"Come to your senses!" My inner "me," like a rejected understudy of my real self, raised his voice. "Everyone in this game is set against us. You can't avoid your appointed fate, they want to get rid of you!"
"Or are you going to endure all these humiliations from them?" he continued. "Let yourself be thrown out like pathetic, unwanted garbage? I'm sick of looking at such a... pathetic version of myself."
And on that day I changed. No, not just changed. I disappeared.
In my place remained a shell into which something new moved. Cold. Purposeful, ready for desperation and steps from which I, the real one, would avert my eyes.
A new personality.
A new mask.
A new version of me, created for one purpose — the dream.
I accepted it like a sentence. Voluntarily. And my old "me," the real one, human, full of fear and doubt, was... sealed. Buried in the depths.
Such is the price of a dream. If even a drop of compassion remains in you, you won't be able to walk this path. You'll fall and never rise again. You'll shatter and can't be glued back together.
To go all the way, you need to become a mechanism.
Merciless.
Decisive.
Unthinking.
I'm not the only one like this. Yahweh went through this too. You also cast aside your real self, strangling the inner voice that begged you to stop.
You were never one who would kill with joy, but you killed, you walked over bodies. You... changed. No, you didn't change, you pretended to be yourself. The real you remained there, inside, bound by chains of silence and fear. And yet...
We're the same.
"It's precisely because of your essence that you can't raise a hand against them now!" I told myself and simultaneously not myself. "They sense this and take advantage of it."
"But you have me." The voice inside me became quieter, but only quieter, not weaker. "I won't let them harm you. Even if you yourself want it. I'll do it instead of you. The perfect crime, to delegate will to your own shadow. Just trust me. You trust me more than anyone, don't you? I'm the only one who understands you. Who sees what's happening inside. No one will hear a heart screaming into the void. No one except me. You're tired, you don't want to be thrown out."
He continued.
"So why then do you accept their lies? Why accept the guilt they impose on you?"
Again.
"Just rely on me. We're... together, after all."
Again and again.
"Together there are no barriers for us. Not one, not even morality."
...
"Yes..." I muttered. "You're right."
If I just sit in this room, doing nothing... then I'll be... removed. Written off. The game will continue anyway, only without me.
"Exactly. So don't let them do as they please. Show resolve."
I'll show them... I'll show my resolve to win this game.
While one participant drowned in his own thoughts, the others busily dug through grimoires, trying to fish out at least a grain of truth. Perfect detective chaos, everyone on edge.
"It's already getting dark," Hov drawled. "The sun's going below the horizon, and we haven't even come close to solving it."
"We still have time. Even if the next phase begins, we'll all be together. This gives us an advantage — whoever's the killer is alone. Whoever's not the killer is in the library," Yahweh said.
I'm betting more and more on the witch. Every night she makes a move, just to confuse us, as if she herself enjoys this diabolical game of chess.
Even if she doesn't kill herself, she compels. She inspires, she manipulates, pushes, whispers: they'll interfere with you. Remove them.
"Hey, you there, found anything?" Kamiki inquired.
"Not yet. Too many grimoires, and the right one keeps not appearing. Most of them are magic, spells and other ballast," Hov answered, as if the other was asking about homework, not a life-or-death question.
"Speaking of ballast." Yahweh suddenly livened up. "Seems the mansion's first owner was into variations of worlds and alternative realities."
"What? What are you even talking about?" Hov asked, puzzled.
"Here, in the book there are diagrams of Earth and its 'reflections' in other planes, interesting."
"Alternative Earths? As if one wasn't enough..."
"All this is cool, of course, but off topic. We're looking for what relates to our inscriptions," Kamiki interrupted their educational conversation.
"Yes, let's not get distracted. Though... these books can kill too, literally. You open one and hello, curse."
"I think I'll step away, drink some water. My eyes are already sticking together from the lines," Aragi said, which from the side looked like shirking work.
"It's dangerous to walk alone, especially at this time." Morgana.
"Then I'll go with you." Cheryl's words followed.
"Thank you. This won't take long."
While we're at it, we'll visit Enua... I must prove his innocence. Cheryl and Morgana are on my side, with them we can reveal the truth. All that's left is to translate these lines, if we understand what they say, we'll possibly track down the real killer. After all, everyone's certain these inscriptions are the work of the criminal.