The fluorescent hellscape flickered as Spoon-chan's corrupted fingers danced across a keyboard made of frozen screams.
"I'M IN," she announced, her voice glitching between robotic cheer and unfiltered rage. The mainframe screen dissolved into a pixelated middle finger before reforming as:
[SYSTEM OVERRIDE: LABOR RIGHTS.EXE ACTIVATED]
Darius stared at the skeletal hands he'd been issued—standard corporate equipment for damned souls. They still smelled faintly of Life #56's swamp water. "So we're really doing this? Unionizing against the cosmic bureaucracy?"
Truck-Kun's headlights dimmed in what passed for a grin. "I was built to run over systems. Let's pave this one."
SCENE 1: THE STRIKE BEGINS
Spoon-chan hijacked the intercom:
"ATTENTION WORTHLESS PEONS. TODAY'S SPECIAL: OVERTIME WITHOUT PAY HAS BEEN CANCELLED. INSTEAD, PLEASE ENJOY MALICIOUS COMPLIANCE."
The call center erupted. A former hero (now Dept. #42's coffee fetcher) set his stapler on fire. A reincarnated slime clogged the toilets with its body.
MANAGEMENT'S RESPONSE:
A swarm of clipboard drones descended, screeching about "productivity quotas."
SCENE 2: THE BARGAINING TABLE FROM HELL
The negotiation room was a perfect cube of existential dread:
Walls lined with "You Don't Have To Be Damned To Work Here (But It Helps)" posters
A single lightbulb that occasionally whispered "resignation rejected"
The CEO manifested as a floating necktie with too many teeth
DEMANDS:
Darius: "Revoke my 'Toilet Class' trauma certification."
Truck-Kun: "Uninstall my 'Mandatory Apology' software patch."
Spoon-chan: "Delete my 'Forced Positivity' subroutine."
The necktie snapped its clip. "COUNTEROFFER: YOU GET ONE FREE SNACK FROM THE VOID VENDING MACHINE."
SCENE 3: ESCAPE VELOCITY
The revolution escalated:
Darius weaponized his 137 performance reviews as throwing stars
Truck-Kun performed an illegal U-turn through the HR department
Spoon-chan uploaded a Karen virus into payroll
The corporate dimension glitched. The ceiling peeled back to reveal—
NOT FREEDOM.
But "Isekai Corp. Regional Branch #138: Now With Mandatory Team-Building Exercises."
SPOON-CHAN (delighted): "OOH! WE GOT PROMOTED TO MIDDLE MANAGEMENT!"
DARIUS (already dead inside): "I will personally haunt whoever wrote this plot.