Alex had barely finished speaking when Nami, eyes sparkling like gold coins, lit up with excitement.
"If that's the case, you must be great at salvaging! Hurry, come with me and help fish up all that gold. I'm sure those treasures are desperate for my care!"
What the hell? I'm a fisherman, not a salvager! There's a world of difference between the two. This girl seriously can't think straight whenever she hears the word "gold," can she?
Alex looked helplessly at the greed-struck expression on Nami's face. He felt like her obsession with money was seriously tarnishing his professional integrity.
By the time they made it to the ship's deck, Nami was still peppering him with questions. Finally, Alex snapped.
"You're seriously annoying. I don't have time for you right now!"
Looking around, Alex noticed the ship was plastered with hearts and symbols of affection, with a swan head adorning the prow—cutesy to the extreme.
He thought of Alvida, fat, bloated, and grotesquely ugly, and felt a chill run down his spine. The contrast between her and this ultra-feminine ship was nauseating.
Just as Alex was about to leave this uncomfortable vessel as quickly as possible, something large and fleshy suddenly came hurtling toward him.
"What is that?!" Nami shrieked.
Crap! Isn't that Alvida, that short, fat, stubby hag? Don't tell me Luffy punched her so hard she's flying straight at me?
Alex squinted and confirmed his worst fear. He instantly stepped back, channeled all his power into his right fist, and roared:
"Get lost!"
BANG!
With one punch, Alex smashed the incoming Alvida off-course. She crashed into the ship's figurehead, and the both of them went sailing into the sea.
Even from a distance, Alex could hear Alvida shrieking furiously,
"Straw Hat brat! And you, you bastard! I won't forgive either of you!!"
Holy crap, that was close. If I hadn't reacted fast enough, that flying blob of lard would've taken me into the ocean with her.
Shaking his numbed and aching right arm, Alex realized just how much strength he had used. Despite giving it his all, his punch merely redirected Alvida. Meanwhile, Luffy casually sent her flying like a missile. There was clearly still a power gap between them.
Luffy should be leaving with Koby now. I've got to find him quickly.
With that thought, Alex picked up his pace—but just then, Nami stopped him.
"Wait, we still need to check one more place."
When she saw Alvida earlier, something clicked in Nami's mind. Even though Alvida was too hideous to love, she was still a female pirate. That meant her captain's quarters were likely full of jewelry and valuables.
Originally, Nami planned to check the captain's room after looting the ship's storage, but her run-in with Alex had almost made her forget.
Without taking no for an answer, Nami shoved her heavy treasure sack into Alex's arms.
"I'm going to look for more!" she said, darting away.
Just then—a cannon shell exploded nearby.
"Is that the Navy?! We need to get out of here, now!" Alex shouted.
"What are you talking about? We haven't taken all the treasure yet—we can't leave now!"
"Which is more important, your life or treasure?!"
"Are you an idiot? Obviously, the treasure!"
As Navy warships began bombarding the pirate vessel, Alex and Nami started arguing. But Nami didn't waste another word—she bolted toward the captain's quarters, determined to loot every last gem Alvida had stashed away.
BOOM! BOOM!
The Navy didn't let up. Some pirates who had tried sneaking back aboard now scrambled in terror. None dared mess with Alex—those who did were promptly knocked into the sky.
Others dove into the sea, only to be blown to pieces by incoming cannonfire.
With each strike, the pirate ship took more damage. Holes opened everywhere, and it began sinking.
While waiting for Nami, Alex overheard some fleeing pirates mention escape boats. He quickly followed them, dealt with them, and found the lifeboats they had talked about.
Realizing the ship could sink any moment, Alex was about to lower a boat and leave when Nami's voice called out:
"Wait for me! Catch this!"
She came running full speed toward him and hurled a huge bag.
Alex caught it—dang, it was heavy. Once Nami climbed into the boat, she yanked the bag back and grinned.
"It's full of Alvida's jewelry and gems. Worth a fortune!"
Alex felt a headache coming on. So the hideous Alvida had hoarded all these sparkly trinkets in her room? Beauty must truly be every woman's instinct, no matter how horrifying her face. Even monsters wanted to accessorize.
SPLASH!
After lowering the escape boat, Alex and Nami landed on the sea.
Where the hell did Luffy go? He should've shown up in an escape boat by now.
Standing up, Alex scanned the horizon—and spotted Luffy and pink-haired Koby sailing far away in a small boat.
"Luffy! I'm still here! Why are you sailing off without me?!"
He grabbed a paddle and furiously rowed, shouting at the top of his lungs.
"Hahaha! Alex! I knew you wouldn't die in that whirlpool! Hang tight—I'll come get you!"
Luffy stood on the stern of his boat, laughing joyfully. His arm stretched out ridiculously far in Alex's direction, trying to grab him.
"Who the hell is that? His arm… it's so long. Is he your friend?" Nami asked, astonished even as cannonfire exploded around them.
Just as Luffy's hand was about to reach Alex, the worst possible thing happened—a cannonball flew straight toward Luffy's extended arm.
Luffy had no choice but to whip his arm out of the way, dodging the shot.
But that whip redirected his hand—and instead of grabbing Alex, he ended up slapping him across the face.
SMACK!
A crisp, loud slap echoed across the sea. Alex was flung forward by the unexpected blow—right into Nami.
Ordinarily, that wouldn't be too bad… except in his loss of balance, Alex's hands accidentally landed on two very soft, very squishy things.
The next moment, across the chaotic sea and over the sound of cannonfire, a lion-like roar exploded:
"Where do you think you're touching, you idiot!?"