"Uzumaki... Naruto?"
Just like with his wife, even though he clearly knew this was the first time meeting the little guy, Fugaku couldn't shake the strange familiarity he felt upon seeing Naruto's sunny, golden hair and distinctive name. It was as if he had forgotten something important. He furrowed his brows slightly, lost in thought, then gave a light nod.
"Come in, little one... Mikoto, it's rare for Sasuke to bring a friend home. Let's show off your cooking tonight in front of the kids."
"Hmm, I was thinking the same thing, dear. It's rare to have a little guest over, and I just happened to buy a lot of ingredients on the way home... In this cold weather, hotpot really is the best choice! I'll go start preparing!"
As a housewife, Mikoto lived up to her reputation as the ideal wife and mother. No sooner had her husband finished speaking than she finalized the menu, holding a still sulky and lifeless Sasuke in her arms as she walked toward the kitchen. "In the meantime, dear, I'll leave this little guest in your care."
"Hotpot, huh? It has been a while... Sounds good."
Perhaps recalling the delicious meals his wife always made, Fugaku's stern expression softened slightly. The corners of his lips curled into a rare smile as he nodded. Suddenly remembering something, he called out to his wife as she walked away.
"Don't forget to wash some of those tomatoes we bought. Sasuke's been begging for them for days."
"Leave it to me, Father."
Itachi, who had been quietly observing from the side, glanced thoughtfully at the obedient-looking Naruto beside him. With a meaningful smile, he patted Naruto on the shoulder before following Mikoto.
"Since Mom still has to take care of Sasuke, she's going to be super busy. I'll go help her in the kitchen. Naruto-kun, I'll leave you in Dad's care for now. Go ahead and rest in the living room for a bit."
"Huh? Eh? Eh?! Itachi, you too?! Wait—Itachi, hold on! I'm not good with kids...!"
Fugaku had assumed his eldest son would stick around to help with this unknown little visitor. But seeing Itachi abandon him without hesitation to follow his wife into the kitchen, Fugaku started to panic. He lowered his voice, trying to convince Itachi to stay, only to find that his son was... walking faster? With a mischievous grin?
'You too, wife? Son? Are you teaming up against me?!'
Fugaku's eye twitched as he turned back to see Naruto staring at him innocently, blinking those wide blue eyes.
'Please... I have no idea how to deal with kids…'
Though a father himself, Fugaku spent most of his time working with serious, respectful adult ninja from the Uchiha Clan or maneuvering among the sly old foxes in the village's upper ranks. Mikoto had always taken care of parenting. Now, suddenly left alone to watch over a pure and innocent child, Fugaku was at a complete loss, overwhelmed with helplessness.
He was supposed to lead Naruto into the living room, as Mikoto had said, but instead found himself locked in an awkward staring contest with the kid.
"Is something wrong, Uncle? Did I do something weird?"
Naruto's innocent curiosity clashed with Fugaku's traditional, stern image. A mischievous glint sparked in Naruto's eyes—he was clearly in the mood to mess with him. He tilted his head and pouted slightly, sucking on a finger as he mumbled,
"Or... does Uncle not like me? If that's the case, I guess I'll just go home then..."
"W-Wait!"
Fugaku didn't even think—he barked a command out of reflex:
"Stay. Don't move!"
'You've got to be kidding me! My son finally brings home a friend on his own, and if I mess this up while Mikoto's joyfully making dinner—'
'Forget Sasuke being upset… I'll be spending the night—no, several nights—on the freezing couch!'
'Whew… Good thing I said something in time… Now, let me think… How does Mikoto usually deal with Itachi and Sasuke again?'
"...Ugh... huu..."
'Huh? W-What the—?!'
Just as Fugaku was beginning to feel relieved, he suddenly sensed an ominous pressure. He glanced down at Naruto, who had stiffened. The boy trembled slightly, lowered his head, bit his lip, and pouted…
It was exactly the same face Sasuke made before—
'Oh no... Don't you cry! Please don't cry, kid!'
"Hnnngh... huu... WAAAHHHH!!"
Too late. Fugaku's instinctive tone had come off too harsh, and before he could fix it, Naruto's eyes overflowed with tears. He dropped to the floor, buried his face in his knees, and let out a loud, pitiful wail.
"Honey? I think I heard crying? Did you make our little guest cry?"
"Wh-What?! Of course not! Hahaha, you must be hearing things, Mikoto!"
Frozen, panicking, and utterly lost on how to console a crying child, Fugaku broke into a cold sweat at his wife's question from the kitchen. He quickly scooped Naruto into his arms and hurried to a quiet corner of the living room.
Cradling the sobbing boy as he kicked and flailed, Fugaku forced a stiff, twisted smile and begged in a low voice,
"L-Little guy… no, my little ancestor… it's Uncle's fault, I shouldn't have yelled. I'm sorry, really... There, there... please stop crying, okay?"
It seemed Fugaku's pleading was starting to work. Naruto's sobs quieted, and he looked up cautiously.
Just as Fugaku was about to sigh in relief, Naruto saw the strained, grotesque expression on Fugaku's face—and burst into even louder tears.
"WAHHHH! I wanna go home! I wanna go hooooome!"
'That's it. I'm done. I should've just let him leave earlier…'
If he let Naruto run home now, there'd be no saving him. Forget the couch—he'd be kicked out of the house entirely to sleep in the freezing snow for days.
"Dar—ling—?"
"N-Nothing! Nothing at all! I was just playing around with the kid, that's all!"
Hearing Mikoto's increasingly suspicious tone, Fugaku jumped in alarm. His mind raced before he blurted out,
"Oh! That's right, Mikoto! This little guy said he's hungry! Asked when dinner would be ready!"
"...Is that so? Alright, tell him I'll try to finish as soon as possible. Ask him to be patient just a bit longer."
Though still skeptical, Mikoto acknowledged that it was pretty late when the kids brought Naruto home. Skipping dinner could plausibly make a child this fussy, so she chose to believe the excuse and focused on finishing the meal.
'Phew... That was close...'
"Ohhh, my little ancestor, please don't cry anymore…"
Relieved that Mikoto seemed convinced, Fugaku tried to soothe Naruto again. But instead of calming down, Naruto's wailing grew louder and louder. His cries of "I wanna go home!" made Fugaku pace in panic like a cat on hot bricks. He lowered his voice as much as possible and threw out a desperate offer:
"My little ancestor… If you stop crying, I'll do anything you want, okay? Just please stop crying!"
"Sniff… huu… cough… sniff… R-Really?"
Naruto's crying slowly ceased. He peeked out from behind his chubby hands with red-rimmed eyes, his voice raspy and trembling.
"Of course it's true! Uncle is the head of the Uchiha Clan! I would never lie!"
"...Then… okay…"
Naruto pouted and stared at Fugaku with sparkling blue eyes. After a long pause, he carefully extended his pinky finger.
"Then… pinky swear..."
"Yes, yes, pinky swear!"
Fugaku was so desperate to pacify this ticking time bomb that he didn't even care.
In his mind, kids only wanted toys or flashy ninjutsu. He hurriedly hooked his pinky with Naruto's and gave it a little shake.
"Pinky swear… hang yourself… one hundred years, no take-backs… liars are puppies!"
"Yes, yes, pinky swear, hang it high, one hundred years, no take-backs, and liars are puppies…"
Seeing Naruto's mood brighten at last, Fugaku finally felt the weight lift from his chest. He tried his best to respond with a kind, gentle smile—
...completely unaware that the teary-eyed little kid in his arms was now smirking like a cunning little fox.
Those innocent eyes were glinting with the smug satisfaction of a successful plan fulfilled...