Who knew I could move that fast?
In a moment of sheer panic, I threw my arms around Haruna and snatched the detonator from her hand as she stood frozen in shock.
I suppose I ended up using her feelings for me against her, but I couldn't just stand by and watch her blow up a stall right in front of me.
But that wasn't the real issue. The problem was that I was one of the festival organizers. A terrorist act happening on my watch, regardless of how justified Haruna's anger might be, would be a major blow to my reputation.
If this had happened at some Gehenna stall, I probably would have just let Haruna do her thing. I mean, putting squid in takoyaki instead of octopus? That's a travesty of the highest order.
…Although, I was more amazed by Haruna's palate. To be able to distinguish squid from octopus amidst all the sauce and batter of a takoyaki… that in itself was a true art form.
Clutching the detonator, I slowly backed away from Haruna, bracing myself for Nagisa's piercing glare. Thankfully, Haruna seemed to have cooled down a bit, but now Nagisa was the one who was fired up. What a mess.
Well, soothing Nagisa was a problem for later. Right now, I had to deal with this "no-octopus takoyaki" incident.
"Haruna-chan, I know you're angry, but…"
"…Fu, fufu. Mika-san, sometimes you are just too pure for your own good."
"Huh?"
"I haven't even planted any explosives yet. What exactly was I going to detonate? Honestly, I doubt there is another person in this world as adorable as you."
"Wow…?"
She had a point. I was speechless. What good is pulling the trigger of an unloaded gun?
So, I had been completely fooled by Haruna's act… and yet, as the one who fell for it, it felt silly to say, but I didn't think it was all an act. That dark, murderous glint in her eyes as she looked at the stall—that had to be genuine.
In the end, if I asked her how much of it was real, she'd probably say all of it. If there had been explosives planted, and if I hadn't stopped her, she would have pressed that button.
"…Getting all flustered just because Mika-san hugged you once, and you have the nerve to tease her. Kurodate-san, your audacity is truly staggering."
"Oh? Kirifuji-san, you may not be aware, but this was not an attempt to tease Mika-san. I was simply curious to see how she would react if I pulled this out. In all our gourmet adventures together, we have been unusually lucky in avoiding landmines, so I never had the chance to use it."
"…I see. Now I remember. The terrorist who blew up an ice cream shop in our Trinity district a few months ago and vanished… that was you, wasn't it, Kurodate-san?"
"Fufu. Our first meeting was also, technically speaking, a result of Mika-san intending to stop me from doing something rash. It was only after we met and got along so well that we continued to maintain our friendship."
Haruna was right; even I hadn't imagined we'd hit it off so well that day. But hearing her tell Nagisa about it felt strange. I mean, the person she was talking to was the one who had to deal with the headaches whenever she caused trouble in Trinity.
"Ahaha… Hey, let's drop that subject for now. So, Haruna-chan, you're not going to blow it up, right? If something like that happens at this festival, I'm the one who gets in trouble. So, I'm asking you, please don't cause any problems here. Can you do that for me?"
"…Mika-san, what you are asking of me goes directly against my gourmet path. Of course, what I just did was merely to see your reaction, but the desire to detonate the stall is still very much real."
"Please, I'll take responsibility and have this stall removed. Can you let it go for that? Deceiving customers like this is a breach of contract anyway, so if you want, I can do it right now—"
"What are you people talking about? What are you going to detonate, and what do you mean you'll have my stall removed…? By what right?"
I sometimes find the halo-blindness of people in Kivotos a little frustrating. I might have changed my hairstyle and put on a hat, but with a halo as distinctive as mine, you'd think they'd know who I was at a glance.
Anyway, as the stall owner interjected, Haruna narrowed her eyes and glared at the cat-like beastman.
"Why did you use squid in this takoyaki?"
"Squid? I haven't used any squid. If you're just going to make things up and spout nonsense, then get lost."
"Oh, so that's how you want to play this? Very well. I will prove it to you."
Taking out another toothpick, Haruna held one in each hand and began to dissect the takoyaki in front of her.
While she was doing that, I got curious if I could feel the difference in texture, so I speared a takoyaki and popped it into my mouth.
…What? This is just octopus.
"…Tsk, see? It's octopus, isn't it? Honestly, the nerve of some people. Don't even know what you're eating and trying to blame an innocent man."
"…This can't be."
I could see the panic in Haruna's eyes as she finished dissecting a piece. Inside was, undeniably, a piece of octopus.
"Hmph, what a waste of time. I'm sick of looking at you, so scram. Or I'll call the Justice Task Force for obstruction of business."
Um, they'd probably have to kneel the second they saw me.
More importantly, Haruna was wrong? Seriously?
"Hmm, from what I tasted, it's definitely octopus."
"…What? The one I ate felt like squid."
The ones who thought it was squid were Haruna and Nagisa. The ones who thought it was octopus were me and Noah.
"I know what this is. Nagi-chan, you know what I'm talking about, right?"
"Yes, it's such a transparent trick I could almost yawn. To think they could deceive people with something so low-level… it's just pathetic."
"Huh? You people still here? If you're going to keep spouting that nonsense, stop taking up space and get lost!" the owner snapped again, but it sounded like nothing more than the squeaking of a cornered rat.
Nagisa and I ignored him and began dissecting every takoyaki in sight. The owner's eyes started to tremble nervously.
Regardless of what he did, we focused on exposing the contents of every last piece. As Nagisa said, it was a pathetically simple trick.
"…I see. Now that I've seen this, I feel twice as angry."
The truth, finally revealed, was that in a box of eight takoyaki, only two were made with squid. If we had only bought one box, and Nagisa and Haruna had each eaten one, we would never have been able to expose the stall's fraud.
It seemed he'd raised the proportion of octopus just in case a situation like this arose. This… the method itself was malicious. This was a serious offense.
"Does this look like octopus to you?"
"Y-Yes! It's octopus no matter how you look at it. You keep trying to frame me like this… Have you no fear of the heavens?!"
"My heavens are perfectly clear and blue without your concern, so I think they'll be fine."
Once the situation was clear, there was no need to hesitate. I immediately sent a message to my Tea Party attendants. This despicable takoyaki stall was officially out of business.
What followed was a conversation that was less of a discussion and more of me exercising my authority on topics like breach of contract. By tomorrow, a different takoyaki stall would probably be in its place. The festival had drawn that much interest, after all.
After peacefully resolving the incident, I asked Haruna for her thoughts, and her response wasn't half-bad.
"…Even if I had blown up that stall, that person would have just done the same thing elsewhere. In that sense, your method of thoroughly obstructing their future endeavors isn't so bad. They'll have to give up on doing business in Trinity and Millennium, at least."
"Ahaha! See? Blowing up stalls isn't always the answer."
"That's because you have power, Mika-san. That method wouldn't work in Gehenna."
Hmm. As expected, I suppose. Just like a student even Sensei failed to reform, Haruna seemed to have no intention of changing her ways. Still, was I supposed to be glad that she at least pretended to yield because I was with her?
"However, I suppose I will need to exercise some restraint so as not to harm your reputation, Mika-san. Inside Gehenna is one thing, but perhaps it would not be so bad to practice a bit of patience when outside. Fufu…"
Hmm, should I consider this a semi-successful reformation? Though, the fact that she was doing it out of concern for my reputation, rather than any sense of right or wrong, suggested it was far from a true change of heart. Still, her willingness to bend her principles for my sake held a strange sort of resonance.
It was the kind of thing that made a person's heart flutter.
"…Ah, Nagi-chan?"
"Are you happy? You look happy. No, of course you're happy, you philanderer."
"…"
Nagisa poked me in the side, her face a mask of discontent, and I was at a loss for words.
This really isn't easy. What kind of lives did those men with multiple wives and concubines lead in the old days?
I knew this was the result of my own unwitting flirtations and my own greed, but I couldn't help feeling suffocated.
Just how entertaining was this situation for Noah to watch? I don't think the smile has left her face once today.
Placing a hand on the shoulder of a visibly sulking Nagisa, I looked her in the eyes.
"I'm sorry for being a bad woman, Nagi-chan. This is all my fault."
"…What, exactly, is your fault?"
"Ahaha, there are too many things to count… but if I had to name one, it would be my own greed, for not being satisfied even with a girlfriend as beautiful and lovely as you. It's definitely not because you're lacking in any way. You're more than I deserve, and I feel I'm receiving more love than I deserve."
I gently stood on my tiptoes and placed a light kiss on Nagisa's lips.
"I love you so much, Nagi-chan. I mean it."
"…You're insufferable. Don't think you can get away with this forever."
"Can't you just let me get away with it, for a long, long time?"
"Are you trying to be the death of me?"
"Eh, but Nagi-chan, you love me too much to die, right☆? Am I wrong?"
"You absolute… sigh. Fine. Just stay still."
With a serious tone, Nagisa wrapped an arm around my waist. And what followed was—
"…Wow, isn't this a bit… improper?"
"Hmm…"
The words of the two people behind me barely registered as Nagisa's feelings were conveyed to me, intensely. Truly, intensely.
After she let me go, I saw that her face was even redder than mine, though I knew she would deny it to her dying breath.
"What you took that day was nothing. You understand that now, don't you, Kurodate-san?"
"…?"
And the first thing she does with that beet-red face is provoke Haruna?
Uh, Nagisa…? I know this from experience, but you should never, ever provoke Haruna. If you do…
"Fufut. I see. So you wanted to show that off."
"Show off? I would never do something so childish. I was simply helping Kurodate-san to face an obvious truth."
"I'd like to ask you something in return. Are you sure that's something worth showing off?"
"…?"
"If it had been me instead of you, Kirifuji-san, I would have at least tasted the cherry on top of the cream cake by now. You're far too slow. Oh, or perhaps for a lady of Trinity, this is actually considered quite fast?"
"There is no need to be so roundabout in saying that it is the nature of demons to treat something as sacred as love so lightly."
Ah, here they go again. I can't take this…
What I found most annoying was Noah, standing beside me with a wide grin, clearly having no intention of helping and just observing the show.
Was it just me, or was the ordeal of mediating between these two on our way to watch the water-skiing finals more exhausting than my actual Tea Party duties?
And even though this was all my fault, lately, I've been thinking that Nagisa is a better fit for the role of Pater than I am…