The dormitory was plunged into oppressive darkness. The fluorescent lights vibrated on the ceiling, diffusing a cold, almost sickly light. No one could sleep. Some stared at their mattresses without a word, others whispered as if to convince themselves that everything was okay. I sat with my back against the wall, unable to sleep, wondering if this was a good idea.
-Why did I upset him, I couldn't take on the mission
Asmara wasn't there. Since the incident in the simulation room, she had vanished, and her absence weighed more heavily than her presence. As the hour drew near,
Joy sat down next to me. She rubbed her hands together as if to warm them.
"Do you still think she'll come back?" she asked in a low voice.
"She'll come back," I replied without thinking. "She never gives up, she won't leave us."
Fear, leaning on the opposite bed, let out an ironic breath.
- Or she's planning a coup behind our backs.
An icy silence followed. Even Joy looked away, her eyes shining, but with what? I didn't know.
I gritted my teeth.
- It's her dream, she'll come back. We have to stay together for what happens.
Joy sneered,
- Easy to say when you don't know yet what she's capable of, leave her, you can only count on yourself and we will help you.
-Why-
I wanted to retort, but the dormitory door burst open. Two figures in dark uniforms entered. Patrolmen. Their boots clattered against the floor, echoing like hammer blows in the silent room.
The old man.
The second, a square-jawed veteran, scanned the room.
- Recruits. In position. Prepare yourselves, you will be going with a capsule.
Everyone straightened up mechanically. Me too.
The second one continued, lingering for a moment on our tired faces. His eyes slid over Joy, then over me, and he made a slight, almost human movement of his head. And continued, dryly:
-You're leaving in a few hours for the Forest of Shadows. Official test. Prepare your things.
A shudder ran through the room.
-Can't we choose the simulation? I asked, my voice barely audible.
The old man turned slowly towards me. His gaze, cold as steel, sank into my skin.
- The Forest of Shadows, that's what your representative has chosen, don't worry, the veteran here will drive the capsule to its destination and pick you up at the end of the test
Several recruits caught their breath. I blanched. Surprise cursed under his breath.
-It's a joke... whispered Fear.
-she's not even the boss, he breathed in disgust
-she's not well in her head or what
- They say no squad ever returns whole, added Fear.
-she likes to cause problems too much
The new recruits frowned, but the old man ignored them.
- Gathering in a few hours. Weapons, rations, full equipment. The journey will be long. If you forget anything, the forest will remind you. Good luck, may our "mother" be with you.
Without another word, they left the room, leaving behind a stifling blanket of silence.
Now I was completely confused, who should I trust, I doubted the intentions of joy and especially the problems she is looking for and there it is the person in whom I believe the most who sends us to the slaughterhouse, we are not ready, I am not ready
The recruits had collapsed on their beds, except for joy. The whispers resumed, nervous, broken.
- The Forest of Shadows…, we're not dead, I murmured
- Whatever, replied Joy, you are here, I am here, nothing will happen.
- If you say it like that, I'll end up believing you, I whispered.
-I'm serious, it will be easy
I clenched my fists.
-STOP .
She jumped and stared at me
-That's all well and good, but I'm being realistic, I'm not a hero, I'm shit, I've always been told that, that's why my parents threw me in the pit-
I'm stopping early too.
Joy burst out laughing, dry and nervous.
-sorry, how they threw you in the pit, you weren't born there
My heart sank, but I didn't answer. Because I had said too much, it was too risky.
-.. I'm going…. I have to go…. Goodbye, I have to go
I whispered, moving away from her to escape, I went through the door and rushed down the hallway
I couldn't stand the heavy air of the dormitory any longer, and I had to find Asmara, so I started exploring. Rooms, rooms, most of them locked. The metal corridors vibrated with the distant hum of generators. The smell of iron and oil saturated my nostrils.
Finally
Asmara was there. Sitting alone on a bench in the shadows. Her hair clung to her forehead, her breathing shallow. Her eyes stared at the ground as if searching for an answer.
- Romance…
She looked up at me. Her eyes were burning, red with anger, but also… determined.
"Are you here to humiliate me again? Or are you here to claim your place again?" she said hoarsely.
I remained silent.
-Are you serious, you think I didn't see? You think I didn't understand?, huh, you're ready to go that far just to become an "EMOTIONAL", kill us your teammates, we're not like a family
Her voice broke. She looked away, her jaw clenched.
-I don't need anyone to steal my place, you are nothing more than stairs that will allow me to reach the top, I don't need family or allies, I've never seen you like this, you are my pawns, she added, clenching her fists.
I approached, slowly.
-You're going crazy, how can you say that, I'm not trying to steal anything from you.
A heavy silence fell. The hum of pipes echoed around us.
Asmara turned and said
- you are truly a hopeless case, either it's black or it's white, blind and stupid, a child of the pit
-What's happening to you, why are you acting like this?
Asmara slowly turned her head towards me. Her eyes narrowed, a strange light passing through them.
- I don't have to explain myself, it's me again in front of you, if you value your life then shut your mouth and be very careful or else you risk unfortunately getting lost in this forest
She jumped up and left without waiting for my answer. Her footsteps clattered in the corridor like hammer blows.
I stood there, breathless, unable to tell if his words were a promise or a threat.
Two o'clock had passed, the mess hall was as silent as a funeral chapel. The recruits were barely eating, grinding away at their pasty rations without appetite. The white masks passed between the tables, observing,
I tried to break the silence:
-she will be on our side
Joy shook her head, pale.
- Illusions, she's lying to you
Surprise hit the table.
- It's okay, there's only her, again and again, even though she's the one who sent us there.
For a moment, his eyes met mine. Only for a moment, but I read in his gaze a confidence that I understood.
Suddenly
A shrill horn echoed throughout the complex. The speakers squeaked, and then the instructor's metallic voice rose:
Omega Squad, assemble. Today begins your trial. Destination: Forest of Shadows.
A shiver ran down my spine
The recruits stood up,
Asmara entered at that moment, her figure as straight as a blade. She said nothing, didn't even look at me. But her presence silenced everyone.
The massive veteran was waiting for us outside the boarding gates. His cold eyes slid over us, one by one.
"In the Forest of Shadows," he explained, "there are no rules. Your only mission is to survive. Those who fail won't return. Those who succeed… maybe."
He gave a mirthless smile.
- Good luck, Omega Squad. You'll need it.
The airlock opened with a metallic roar. Beyond, a blast of cold air rushed in. And with it, a heavy, damp, almost animal smell.
The Forest of Shadows awaited us.