The dawn broke over Syrup Village, painting the sky in soft hues of orange and pink. But on the narrow, sloping path of the northern coast, the morning air was cold and thick with the promise of violence.
Usopp stood alone.
Before him, stretching down the entire length of the dusty slope, was a sea of grim-faced men—the entire crew of the Black Cat Pirates. They were a menacing sight, a silent, disciplined force of pirates, their cutlasses and strange weapons gleaming in the new day's light. At their head, the tall, strange figure of Jango the hypnotist stood, his heart-shaped glasses glinting.
Behind Usopp, there was nothing. Just an empty path leading back to the peaceful village he had sworn to protect.
His knees knocked together with a frantic, audible rhythm. A cold sweat trickled down his spine. He was utterly, hopelessly outmatched.
'What is this?!' his mind screamed in panic. 'Why am I the first one here?! I'm sure that Luffy guy ran ahead of me…!'
Jango looked up at the lone, trembling figure, a smirk playing on his lips. "Well, well. I see you didn't run," he called out, his voice echoing in the quiet cove. "You overheard my little plot last night. What kind of trick are you planning now, boy?"
Usopp flinched. They knew he had overheard them. There was no backing down now. He had to do something. He had to rely on his one and only true weapon.
He took a deep, shaky breath, planting his feet wide. He spread his arms out in a grand, theatrical gesture, his fingers splayed, trying to project an aura of immense power that he absolutely did not feel.
"I'M WARNING YOU!" he boomed, his voice cracking only slightly. "IF YOU DON'T ALL RETREAT RIGHT NOW…"
He paused for dramatic effect, channeling every ounce of bravado he could muster.
"THEN MY ONE HUNDRED MILLION MIGHTY FOLLOWERS WILL CHOP YOU ALL INTO A HUNDRED PIECES!"
The declaration hung in the air. The Black Cat Pirates stared, a wave of murmurs rippling through their ranks.
"What?! One hundred million?!"
"Even a kid wouldn't believe that…"
"My god! Is he serious?"
"It's just a lie, Captain!" one of them hissed to Jango. "How can he brag like that…?"
Usopp's heart was pounding. 'Ahhh! They saw right through it! I'm exposed!'
But Jango didn't move. He stroked his chin, actually considering the absurd claim. From his perspective, no one would be stupid enough to stand alone against an entire pirate crew unless they had a powerful trick up their sleeve. This boy had claimed to be a Captain. This could be a trap.
"Is he really trying to fool us?" Jango mused aloud.
Just then, one of his crewmen pointed towards the two small boats bobbing in the water next to their ship. "Captain, big news!"
"What is it?!"
"We found something in those two little boats… It's extraordinary! Four… no, it must be FIVE MILLION BELI in treasure!"
A collective gasp went through the crew. Their eyes, which had been on Usopp, now darted greedily towards the boats.
Usopp was just as shocked. 'Fi-five million Beli?! How do they have that much money?!'
Seeing the pirates' attention shift, Usopp improvised, seizing the moment.
"THAT'S RIGHT!" he yelled, trying to sound confident.
"For us?!" the pirates asked, confused.
"YES! It's for you!" Usopp declared. "But on the condition that you retreat! Take all of it and leave this island right now!"
He was trying to bribe them with treasure that wasn't even his.
The pirates looked at Jango, their greed piqued. For a moment, it seemed like the plan might actually work.
Jango was silent for a long moment. Then, a slow, cruel smile spread across his face. "How… lucky for us." He looked at Usopp with pure contempt. "Are you trying to bribe us, you idiot? We're pirates. We'll just take your treasure and kill you all."
He raised his hand, pulling the sharp, spinning chakram from his sleeve. "It's a shame. It seems your men are too scared to show their faces. I guess I'll have to make you get out of the way myself."
He began to swing the ring. "When I say 'ONE, TWO, JANGO!', your feet will move on their own…"
Usopp recognized the hypnotic weapon. He was trapped.
But just as Jango was about to utter the final word, a furious shout erupted from the side of the slope.
It was Nami. She had sprinted all the way from the other coast, and her face was a mask of pure, unadulterated fury. She ignored Jango. She ignored the dozens of armed pirates. Her eyes were locked on a single target.
Usopp.
"Do you have any idea who you are?!" she screamed, running right up the slope towards him. "Giving away other people's property!!"
BONK!
She brought her wooden staff down with all her might, crashing it directly on top of Usopp's head.
"OWWWW!" Usopp shrieked, a large lump instantly forming on his skull. "WHAT WAS THAT FOR?! I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF A STRATEGIC NEGOTIATION!"
Jango and the Black Cat Pirates just stood there, completely bewildered. The tense standoff had just been interrupted by this strange girl who had appeared from nowhere to violently assault her own ally.
Nami ignored Usopp's cries, planting her staff on the ground and pointing an accusing finger at the stunned pirates below.
"AND YOU LOT!" she yelled, her voice echoing across the cove. "THE TREASURE ON THAT BOAT IS MINE! I WON'T GIVE YOU A SINGLE BELI! GUARD IT CAREFULLY, YOU HEAR ME?! I'LL BE BACK FOR IT LATER!"
She then spun back to face Usopp, her anger renewed. "Don't you go making promises you can't keep! Don't you dare touch my treasure!"
The pirates were speechless. Jango slowly lowered his chakram, a look of pure confusion on his face. This strange, dysfunctional group was unlike any enemy he had ever faced. After a moment, his confusion was replaced by a wide, mocking grin.
"Hahahaha! What a farce! So this is the mighty defense of Syrup Village? A long-nosed liar and a greedy little witch who fight amongst themselves?"
He raised his chakram again. "Enough games. It's time to get to work."
The pirates let out a collective battle cry and began their charge up the slope.
The charge began.
Like a black tide, the Black Cat Pirates surged up the narrow slope, their cutlasses raised, their faces twisted into grimaces of bloodlust.
"Get them! Don't let them get away!"
Usopp stood at the top, his heart hammering against his ribs. Nami stood beside him, her staff held tight, her knuckles white. They were hopelessly outnumbered.
"Are you sure about this, Usopp?" Nami asked, her voice tight. "Luffy… where is he?"
"I don't know!" Usopp admitted, sweat beading on his brow. "He must have gotten lost! But it doesn't matter! I will handle them!"
Nami looked at him, then back at the approaching horde. "Alright. I'll get out of the way. I can't believe I'm letting you handle this…"
But as the pirates closed in, Usopp and Nami moved as one. They reached into their bags.
"Take this!" Nami yelled.
"Makibishi Jigoku!!!" (Caltrop Hell!!!) Usopp roared, giving his attack a dramatic name.
They unleashed a shower of small, black, wickedly sharp caltrops. The spiky metal stars blanketed the slope in front of them, glinting menacingly in the morning sun.
The front line of pirates, focused only on their targets, didn't see the trap until it was too late.
"YEEEOOOWCH!"
"GYAAAH! MY FEET!"
"IT'S A TRAP! GET OUT OF THE WAY!"
The charge devolved into a chaotic dance of pain. Pirates hopped on one foot, trying to pull the sharp spikes from the soles of their boots, their momentum completely broken.
"It's working!" Nami cheered, a look of genuine surprise on her face.
"Now, taste my special attack!" Usopp yelled, ducking behind a rock for cover. He pulled back the band of his slingshot, his aim steady despite his shaking hands.
"Namari Boshi!" (Lead Star!)
WHIZ!
A small lead pellet shot through the air with incredible speed and accuracy, striking a pirate right between the eyes. The man collapsed instantly.
WHIZ! WHIZ!
He fired again and again, picking off pirates who were struggling with the caltrops. His skills as a sharpshooter were undeniable.
Far away, on a different slope, a different kind of struggle was taking place.
"DAMN IT ALL!" Zoro roared in frustration. He was flat on his back, covered from head to toe in black, slippery oil. Every time he tried to stand, his feet would shoot out from under him, sending him sliding back to the bottom.
"THAT WOMAN… NAMI, YOU BASTARD! YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS!"
He was furious. He was humiliated. And he was completely stuck. He tried to crawl, but his hands found no purchase.
Finally, his frustration boiled over into grim determination. "How can a mere oil slick stop me!"
SHINK.
He drew one of his swords and stabbed it deep into the earthen slope, using it as an anchor.
SHINK.
He drew a second sword and did the same, a few feet higher. Using his immense upper body strength, he began to haul himself up the treacherous slope, one sword-hold at a time, like a mountain climber on a vertical ice sheet.
It was a grueling, exhausting process, but he finally reached the top, his muscles burning, his body still coated in grease.
He stood up, panting, and looked around at the dense, unfamiliar forest.
"Okay…" he muttered, trying to get his bearings. "Now… where the hell is the northern coast?"
He scanned the horizon, then confidently pointed in a completely random direction.
"North is this way!"
And with a determined shout, he ran off, getting even more hopelessly lost.
In yet another part of the island, a familiar figure was also running in circles.
"WHICH WAY IS NORTH?!" Luffy yelled to the empty forest, his voice filled with a desperate, hungry confusion.
Back at the real battle, the tide was beginning to turn against the village's unlikely defenders.
"See? This isn't so bad!" Nami said, feeling a surge of confidence as Usopp took down another pirate. "I think I can take a rest now."
She took a triumphant step back, and then immediately shrieked in pain.
"OW!"
She looked down. She had stepped on a caltrop. "Where did this come from?! Usopp, did you throw them back here?!"
"It wasn't me!" Usopp yelped, his concentration broken for a fatal second.
In that second, a group of pirates, having endured the pain and pushed through the caltrop field, finally reached the top of the slope. A large, brutish pirate slammed into Usopp with a powerful shoulder tackle, sending him flying.
He hit the ground hard, the air knocked out of his lungs.
The pirates didn't stop. Their orders were clear: get to the mansion. They began to run past him.
But as the pirate who had hit him ran by, Usopp, bruised and battered, reached out a trembling hand and grabbed his leg.
"You're… not… going anywhere…" he gasped, clinging on with all his might.
The pirate looked down in annoyance. "Get off me, you brat!"
"I won't let you…" Usopp said, his voice trembling but filled with an unshakeable conviction. "The villagers… they don't know you're here. For them, tomorrow is just supposed to be another peaceful day. I… I will protect that peace!"
"How touching," the pirate sneered, raising his sword to finish Usopp off. "Now die."
"GET AWAY FROM HIM!"
Nami charged in, swinging her staff with all her strength and knocking the pirate away from Usopp. But in doing so, she left herself open. Another pirate immediately struck her from the side with the flat of his blade, sending her tumbling to the ground next to him.
They were both down, helpless.
Jango, having finally woken from his nap, saw the path was clear. His head was throbbing.
"Forget them!" he ordered his crew. "We're behind schedule! Get to the mansion and execute the plan! If we're late, Captain Kuro will have all of our heads!"
The crew surged forward, a black tide of malice about to wash over Syrup Village.
Usopp, seeing them about to pass, made one last, desperate attempt. He tried to get to his feet, to fire one last shot, to do something.
It was at that exact moment that two figures appeared at the top of the slope.
A flash of steel. A blur of red.
SWISH!
The pirates at the front of the charge suddenly found their swords sliced in half. Zoro stood there, his one good eye cold and sharp.
BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM!
A flurry of rubbery fists sent a dozen more pirates flying backwards, knocked out cold. Luffy cracked his knuckles, a grin on his face.
They had finally arrived.
They stood side-by-side, a swordsman and a rubber man, a protective wall in front of the injured Usopp and Nami. They looked down at the shocked and terrified faces of the remaining Black Cat Pirates.