"What is this?"
Ren leaned forward on the couch, squinting at the floating creature that had materialized before him.
"Wait It has a body behind the chainsaw?"
The vrzzzz sound had stopped, replaced by a softer mechanical purr that sounded almost like breathing.
At first glance, it looked like a German Shepherd puppy. Small, compact, with that particular gangly quality that young dogs had when their paws were still too big for their bodies. The fur was a soft mix of tan and black, exactly the coloring you'd expect from the breed. It even had those adorable floppy ears that puppies had before they stood up properly. The body moved with the enthusiastic energy of a young dog, muscles twitching with barely contained excitement.
But then Ren's eyes traveled upward to where the head should be, and his brain stuttered to a halt.
In place of a dog's head, there was a chainsaw. A rustic, old-fashioned chainsaw that looked like it had been pulled from a shed after decades of hard use. The metal was dark with age and oil, the blade teeth sharp but worn from countless uses. The handle was wrapped in leather that had been stained black with time and use. And there were traces of blood on it, old stains that had seeped into the metal and never quite washed away, darker patches that told stories Ren probably didn't want to know.
The puppy body wagged its tail happily, completely oblivious to how disturbing the entire image was. The chainsaw tilted slightly to one side in what might have been a curious expression if it had been an actual head. The blade made a soft clicking sound as it moved, like mechanical joints adjusting.
"Okay," Ren said slowly, his voice carefully neutral. "That's extremely unique, to say the least."
Levi leaned forward in his chair, peering at the creature with academic interest. "Well, that's certainly not your average familiar."
Ren opened his system window with a thought, the familiar blue interface appearing in his vision. He needed to understand what exactly he was looking at because his mind was having serious trouble processing the contradiction of cute puppy body and terrifying chainsaw head. The disconnect was making his eyes hurt.
Familiar: Chainsaw Demon (Race: Divine Spirit)
Appearance: It resembles a German Shepherd puppy, small, loyal, and almost adorable, until one sees the chainsaw replacing its head. The rusty blade drips faintly with old blood, and every breath it takes comes out as a metallic growl. When excited, the teeth of the saw chatter like laughter, echoing through the air with a mix of affection and menace.
Additional Note: Can transform into a real chainsaw.
Ren's eyebrows rose as he continued reading. The description was accurate, disturbingly so. He could hear the metallic quality to the creature's breathing now that it had been pointed out, like air being pulled through an engine rather than lungs. Each inhale made the blade vibrate slightly, creating a soft whirring sound that was almost hypnotic.
His eyes moved down to the next section, labeled in ornate script.
Lore :
Born from the failed sanctification of a divine healing familiar, the Chainsaw Demon became a vessel of contradiction, half miracle, half massacre. When the Doctor of the Ruin Gospel first touched its cursed metal, the spirit recognized its master. Since then, it has followed the Doctor faithfully, its growl both lullaby and requiem, a divine instrument that blurs the line between salvation and slaughter.
"Doctor of the Ruin Gospel," Ren muttered under his breath, his finger tracing the words in the air where only he could see them. "That me huh"
The title felt heavy, weighted with implications he wasn't sure he was ready to unpack. Ruin and Gospel, destruction and salvation, wrapped together in a name that suggested his healing would always carry a cost.
He scrolled down to the abilities section, his curiosity overriding his unease about having a chainsaw-headed puppy floating in front of him. The blue text shifted, revealing three distinct entries.
Abilities:
Surgical Rebirth
As long as the chainsaw remains running in the Doctor of the Ruin Gospel's hand, any limb the Doctor desires will regenerate within 10 seconds. The process accelerates as the Doctor's level increases.
Ren's eyes widened, his breath catching in his throat. He read the description twice, then a third time, making sure he understood correctly. Instant regeneration. Not healing over time, not gradual recovery, but complete limb restoration in ten seconds. His mind immediately began calculating the combat applications. Lost an arm? Ten seconds. Leg severed? Ten seconds. As long as he held the running chainsaw, his patient would be regenerate.
Unyielding Flesh
When the chainsaw running. As long as the Doctor's head remains intact, death is impossible. Even when split in half, or torn apart, the Doctor will not die as long as the head is not severed.
"Holy shit," Ren breathed, the words barely audible. His hands had started trembling slightly, though whether from excitement or fear he couldn't tell. Functional immortality as long as his brain stayed in one piece. The implications were staggering, almost too much to process. He could be cut in half, have his organs removed, be reduced to just a head and spine, and he'd still be alive. Still conscious. Still able to act.
The horror path was living up to its name in ways he hadn't anticipated.
Irreversible Laceration
Anything cut by this chainsaw, unless the Doctor explicitly permits otherwise, will never heal or regenerate, not through natural recovery, magic, or divine intervention. Each wound becomes an eternal mark of the Doctor's dominion over life and ruin.
Ren sat back against the couch cushions, his mind reeling from the weight of what he'd just read. His mouth had gone dry, and he had to swallow twice before he could speak.
"What the fuck, this is so overpowered."
The third ability was perhaps the most terrifying of all. Permanent wounds. No healing, no regeneration, no divine intervention. Every cut would be forever, an eternal scar that marked his victims until death. It was the perfect counter to regenerators, immortals, and anyone who relied on healing to survive. Once he cut them, they'd carry that wound until they died or he decided to let them heal. The power wasn't just in the damage, but in the choice. He held dominion over whether wounds closed or stayed open forever.
Vrzzz. Vrzzz.
The Chainsaw Demon wagged its tail with enthusiasm, the motion causing its entire body to wiggle in that way puppies did when they were excited. The tan and black fur rippled with each movement, and its little paws paddled in the air as if it were swimming. It floated closer to Ren, drawn by some instinct or connection, and rubbed what should have been its face against his hand.
The metal was warm to the touch, almost alive, vibrating gently with contained energy. The texture was smoother than he expected, worn by use into something that felt almost comfortable. Not cold and harsh like he'd anticipated, but oddly welcoming.
Ren couldn't help but smile despite everything. Despite the absolute horror of its appearance, despite the blood-stained blade and the implications of its abilities, the gesture was pure puppy. Affectionate, trusting, eager for attention and approval. He reached up tentatively and patted the top of the chainsaw where a dog's head would normally be, his fingers running along the warm metal with increasing confidence.
The motion reminded him painfully of Hailey, his dog from his previous life. The German Shepherd who'd been with him during his residency, who'd waited patiently for him to come home from thirty-six hour shifts, who'd been there when he collapsed from his heart attack. The memory brought a bittersweet ache to his chest, a tightness that made breathing difficult for a moment.
"Do you want a name, little boy?" Ren asked softly, continuing to pet the chainsaw head. His voice had taken on a gentle quality, the tone someone used with beloved pets.
Vrzzz! Vrzzz!
The Chainsaw Demon's excitement intensified immediately, its tail wagging so hard its entire back end swayed back and forth. The blade teeth chattered together in what the description had called laughter, creating a sound like metallic applause that echoed through the study. The puppy body did a little spin in the air, showing off its enthusiasm.
"What should I name you that won't get me sued for copyright?" Ren mused aloud, running through options in his head. His brow furrowed in concentration as he considered and rejected various possibilities. Chainsaw-themed names seemed too on the nose. Horror references felt overdone. He needed something that captured both the adorable puppy aspect and the terrifying weapon aspect, something with meaning behind it.
Then it hit him, and he couldn't stop the grin from spreading across his face. It was perfect. Absolutely perfect.
"How about CPR?"
Vrzz! Vrzz!!!
The Chainsaw Demon practically vibrated with approval, bouncing up and down in the air while its tail became a tan and black blur of motion. The chainsaw teeth chattered so rapidly they created a continuous buzzing sound of pure joy, almost musical in its intensity. The puppy body twisted and spun, performing aerial acrobatics that would have been impossible for a real dog.
"Oh, you seem to like it. Good boy. So that's decided then." Ren scratched behind where the ears would be, finding the soft fur behind the metal casing of the chainsaw. The contrast between the warm fur and cool metal was striking. "CPR it is."
"Wait, Ren." Levi interrupted, setting down the teacup he'd been holding with a soft click against the saucer. His expression was a mix of curiosity and barely suppressed amusement, one eyebrow raised in question.
"Why CPR exactly?" Levi asked, leaning forward in his chair with genuine interest. "That's a rather specific choice of name. I assume there's a story behind it?"
"Ahh, CPR," Ren said, his grin becoming wider and taking on a distinctly mischievous quality. His eyes sparkled with the kind of humor that warned of incoming chaos. "Short for Chainsaw Puppy Regeneration."
Pfftt!
Levi spit out the tea he'd just sipped, the liquid spraying across his book in an undignified arc. He coughed and sputtered, one hand flying to his mouth while the other frantically tried to save his novel from tea damage. His shoulders shook with the effort of not laughing while simultaneously trying to breathe.
"I mean, Mr. Levi, that's kinda dirty," Ren said with mock innocence, though his eyes were dancing with barely contained laughter. His grin had grown even wider, clearly delighted by Levi's reaction.
"My apologies." Levi wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, his composure thoroughly shattered. Small drops of tea dotted his shirt front. He grabbed a handkerchief from his pocket and began dabbing at the tea stains on his book, though his shoulders were still shaking with suppressed laughter. "Your sense of humor is really advanced."
He set the damp book aside carefully and picked up his teacup again, taking another careful sip while eyeing Ren warily over the rim, as if expecting another comedic ambush.
"Well, wouldn't it be funny?" Ren's grin took on a distinctly evil quality, his voice dropping into a tone that promised maximum chaos. "I mean, I get stronger by causing fear, right? So imagine this scenario: someone's dying in front of me, and I rush over and say very seriously, 'Let me perform CPR,' and then I pull out a chainsaw and start it up."
He paused for dramatic effect, letting the image sink in.
"The look on their faces would be historical, right? That moment of hope turning to absolute terror. It's perfect."
Pfftt!
Levi spit out his tea again, this time with even more force. The liquid went everywhere, across his shirt, on the floor, a fine mist coating his hands. He bent double, coughing and laughing at the same time, tears streaming down his face. The teacup rattled dangerously in his grip as his whole body shook.
"Ren," Levi managed to gasp out between coughs, his voice strained and wheezing. "If I'm not on the brink of death, please don't heal me."
"Hahahaha, I knew you would say that, Mr. Levi!" Ren's laugh was genuine and warm, the kind that came from sharing a joke with someone who truly understood the twisted humor in it. His whole face lit up with the expression, years of stress temporarily forgotten.
CPR bounced around happily in the air, feeding off Ren's good mood like a puppy sensing its owner's happiness. The chainsaw teeth chattered in what could only be interpreted as laughter, joining in the joke despite not fully understanding the context. The tail wagged with such enthusiasm that the whole body rocked back and forth.
"Now let's move on to the main course," Ren said, his tone shifting from playful to businesslike. The smile remained but took on a different quality, more focused and serious. He stood up from the couch, his posture straightening as he prepared to test out his new familiar's combat form. His hands flexed at his sides in anticipation.
"CPR, chainsaw form."
Vrzzzzzzzzzz.
The transformation was instantaneous and seamless, like watching water flow. The puppy body dissolved into particles of light that spiraled inward, condensing and reshaping with fluid grace. The chainsaw head expanded, growing larger and more defined, the details becoming sharper and more pronounced. Within a single second, CPR had transformed from a floating puppy into a full-sized chainsaw that dropped perfectly into Ren's waiting hand.
The weight was solid and real, substantial in a way that felt right. The handle fit his grip like it had been custom-made for his hand specifically, the worn leather conforming to his palm and fingers. The rusty blade gleamed dully in the study's light, each tooth sharp and ready. The old bloodstains were still visible, darker patches that added character to the weapon rather than making it seem dirty.
Ren grabbed the pull cord with his free hand, feeling the familiar resistance. The cord was thick and rough, clearly designed for repeated use. He'd used chainsaws before, back in his previous life during a brief period when he'd tried to do yard work himself before admitting defeat and hiring professionals. The motion came back to him easily, muscle memory from another lifetime.
He pulled hard and smooth.
VRZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!
The chainsaw roared to life with a sound that filled the entire study, overwhelming every other noise. The engine caught immediately, no sputtering or hesitation, purring with mechanical perfection that spoke of divine craftsmanship. The blade began spinning, a blur of metal teeth that sang with barely contained violence. Each rotation was precise, perfect, the chain moving without wobble or hesitation.
The vibration traveled up Ren's arms, through his shoulders, settling in his chest like a second heartbeat. The sensation was powerful, almost overwhelming, but not unpleasant. It felt right somehow, like an extension of his own body rather than a foreign tool. The weight balanced perfectly, the vibration syncing with his pulse.
"Yeah, this is what I'm talking about," Ren said, his voice barely audible over the chainsaw's roar. His eyes were bright, almost feverish, as he felt the weapon's weight in his hands. The power it represented, both literal and symbolic, thrummed through his entire body like electricity. A grin spread across his face, wide and genuine.
Meanwhile, Levi watched from his chair, his expression shifting from amused to thoughtful to something that might have been concern. His eyes tracked Ren's movements carefully, noting the ease with which he held the weapon, the comfortable familiarity in his posture, the slight smile playing at the corners of his mouth that suggested genuine enjoyment rather than just acceptance.
You're starting to enjoy it, huh, Levi thought, keeping the observation to himself.