CHAPTER 8
After some time crying, Jay left together with the Saint of the place, and they went to pick a book for her. They were walking together until they passed a shelf that caught Jay's attention. He stopped, picked up a book, and looked at the cover.'This cover is so her, I think she's going to like it,' Jay thought, feeling a bit embarrassed. In his past life, he almost never gave gifts to anyone.
Saint Clarice stopped walking and tilted her head with curiosity:"Jay, why did you stop? Are you okay?" she asked, coming toward him.
Jay widened his eyes as he realized something.'Wait, all the things that happened with the Saint felt as if we had known each other for a long time, as if we were dating.' He blushed slightly. 'Aren't we too close?!'
"Are you feeling unwell, Jay?" Clarice asked, worried. "You're red!"
Jay extended his arm with the book toward Clarice, avoiding eye contact out of embarrassment."Here." Jay scratched the back of his neck. "When I saw it, I immediately thought of you."
These words touched Saint Clarice's heart; hearing them, she blushed and felt awkward."Really, ah, uh, thank you."
"Well then, shall we keep going?" Jay quickly changed the subject."Yes! Let's go," Clarice replied immediately.
They continued straight toward the exit, where Poul and Luis were talking. Along the way, the Saint kept fidgeting with her hands and playing with her hair, clearly embarrassed.'I just have to accept this. I have to accept my father going to war. This is something I judged people for in my past life, not accepting events out of their control, and I was one of those people. And in this new life...' As they left the bookstore with a book charged to the King, a gust of wind hit Jay's black hair, messing it up. 'I hope I can learn not to be so hypocritical in this new life.'
"Eh, Jay!" Clarice's voice pulled him out of his thoughts."Yes, Clarice?!" His cheeks burned red. Clarice looked around nervously, clearly uncomfortable.
She stretched out both arms and closed her eyes, shy."Here, accept this as thanks for being my friend."
"Ah, thank you." Jay took the book and looked at the cover, raising his eyebrows in surprise.'A book I actually like. Seriously, how does she know me this well?! And we met today?! Now I feel like a pedophile.'
"Did you l-like it?" The Saint stammered nervously.Jay laughed awkwardly and replied, "Yes, I liked it."
Her embarrassed expression turned into a bright smile. Without realizing it, Jay said,"I'll read this with enthusiasm."'Wait, why did I say that?!'
"What a little couple, huh?" Luis asked, teasingly.Jay blushed; the Saint froze.
After that, the Saint and Jay chatted with Luis and Poul. They kept teasing the two until Mary left, worried she had lost the two children and especially the Saint, a figure of extreme importance. Once she left, pale and sweating, the concern lifted after seeing them with their husbands and Poul. After a few words, everyone went home, except the Saint, who stayed with the King to return to her continent.
She held back her tears to avoid crying."Goodbye, Saint Clarice. I'll miss you."She couldn't hold it and began crying. "I will too." She hugged Jay, sobbing.
Jay returned the hug and whispered in her ear, "Do you like me hugging you too much, Saint?" he said with a sincere, cheerful smile.
Clarice nodded. Then she released Jay, looked into his eyes, and said,"We'll meet again, Jay!""We will. Someday we will meet; it's a promise."
The Saint smiled happily and gave a small kiss on Jay's cheek. He froze, very red. Saint Clarice just laughed at her embarrassed friend and walked toward the Human King, Valerius Adélio, waving her hand. Jay did the same and then followed his family. Poul and Luis stayed alert to anything happening to Jay.
He remembered the kiss he had received from Saint Clarice and touched the spot on his cheek.'Does she like me more than a friend? Or is this cultural? The important thing is that she likes me, and after everything we've been through, she saved me from darkness. For her and my family, I have to be happy.'
He walked with his head down, thinking about these things. Upon arriving home peacefully, he went straight to his room, placed the book Saint had given him on the shelf with his collection, and then lay down on the bed, tired.'What is true happiness? Love or loving someone? Money? Women? Drugs, alcohol, or anything else this world can offer? In reality, these don't bring true happiness; they bring... a fleeting happiness. I want true happiness.' Jay widened his eyes. 'I understand! Since my...'
Suddenly, a strong sleep overcame Jay, gradually pulling him into slumber.'Since my life... my past life, I... I wanted to...' He fell asleep.
"You cannot know that now, what your inner self truly desires," said a mysterious voice.
A few days later, it was time for Poul to leave for the battle he had been eagerly awaiting.
Poul had to leave early. He packed his things and quietly descended, careful not to wake his son and Kyrai, who were sleeping. Each step was cautious and slow. Upon reaching the living room, he found Luis and Mary waiting.
"Good morning, Poul. Are you ready?" Luis asked.Mary just nodded at Poul.
He looked to the side and was surprised to see his son at the kitchen door holding a glass of water, raising it provocatively and raising his eyebrows.'What a cheeky kid. Just because a Saint of extreme importance cares about him, this kid thinks he can show off. Damn, what bad luck,' Poul thought, feeling jealous.
'Are you thinking how your wonderful son can be both cheeky and troublesome at the same time?' Poul thought.
He opened his mouth and widened his eyes in surprise.'Bulls-eye,' thought Poul.
"Father, take care in the war and come home safe."Poul closed his eyes and laughed arrogantly."Of course I'll come back. After all," he said, heading toward his son and placing his hand on Jay's head. "I am the ice genius."
These actions made Jay's heart ease. "Yes, father. It's a promise."Poul nodded and simultaneously said, "It's a promise."
Mary tried not to cry, her eyes shining, one tear escaping. She put her hand over her mouth, trying to hold back.
After hugging his son, his best friend approached and punched his shoulder. He looked seriously at Poul, gave a warm hug, and said,"Don't die in that damn war.""Who do you think I am?""My little ice guy."
Poul laughed.
Luis finished hugging Poul, still holding his shoulders, saying, "I will protect you.""I know you will," Poul said with a smile.
He then went toward Mary, who was fighting back tears that wouldn't stop."Mary!"
Mary turned to Poul, her nose running, hand over her mouth."Mary, you don't have to hold back."
Mary jumped into Poul's arms, and he immediately regretted telling her that, eyes wide."A… Good thing! Poul… don't go. Don't g-go to war," she said, emotions overflowing, stammering.
Luis stepped in and pulled Mary away, even though she resisted. Jay, watching the scene, just… laughed.
After removing Mary, she grumbled and cried at the same time. Poul opened the door:"I'm going," he said confidently, with a slight touch of sadness.
Everyone said, "Stay safe." And thus, he departed on his journey.
After closing the door, Jay picked up the book Saint had given him and started reading. Luis found Jay's behavior odd but continued with his routine.
Jay read as time passed, sometimes sitting, sometimes lying down.'This book completely captivated me! She really knows me. I… I want to see her again.'
He raised his arm over his head, covering his eyes, book on his chest.'I don't understand why I think about her when I read this book. I guess I'll take a walk to the library to distract my mind.'
He got up from the sofa and went to his room to change.
On the way, he encountered his little sister, sleepy and annoyed, hair messy, making a small pout.
He stopped walking and waited for her to pass calmly, then continued without having to witness that little disaster.
Upon reaching his room, he began to change, taking off his pajamas and putting on shorts and a shirt.
A masculine voice said, "I can't believe I'm sealed in a guy who likes little girls. I thought you liked busty girls or at least those with big butts. But no, what a disappointment."
"How do you know my type, you blue jerk?""Oh, don't say that, man. You have no right because you like lolis!"
Jay gritted his teeth, cursing Roh.
After getting dressed, he left his room and went to the front door. Seeing it was too early for the library, he headed to the balcony, with nothing to entertain himself.
He sat and observed the view. Listening to birds singing and seeing the wind sway the trees, he enjoyed the scenery, even though the sky was somewhat dark and gray. Peace, after a long time, came at that moment. He remembered the past; though bitter and rusty, he had fond memories.
'Good times, when my father wasn't in the army, and my mother was still alive. During that time, I was relearning to love, but darkness took her from me along with my father and made me break my promise to him. Now, with a taste of blood in my mouth and hands stained, I can say that after all this…'
The sky cleared, and all gray turned colorful. 'I'm freeing myself from the darkness.'
"What the hell are you doing out here in this cold?" interrupted a voice, breaking Jay's thoughts.
Jay turned, shrugged."Just felt like it," he replied coldly.
The person laughed lightly, then approached and sat down."You know Jay, I still taste that flavor in my mouth. You must feel it too, right?""Yes, I feel it, Uncle Luis," Jay said softly, lowering his head.
"Yes, that's completely normal when you kill someone."
He stared at Luis, eyes wide with fear and anxiety. He wanted to ask but feared the outcome. Jay swallowed hard before asking:"Have you killed anyone besides those soldiers?"
Luis, without looking at him, sunlight illuminating part of his face, replied, "Yes, I've killed others besides them."
Hearing this, Jay exhaled deeply, feeling less troubled.'I should have suspected from the start.'
At the end of his statement, Jay chuckled lightly."I know you wouldn't kill for pleasure but to protect those you love.""Yes, you are right."
Luis turned to Jay with curiosity and surprise. "You have a lot of maturity for your age, boy!"
Jay raised his eyebrows. "Yes, I do. Why? Did you just notice?""Kind of, especially after your father left. You didn't care much, but your actions show otherwise."
Jay looked away.'Well, I was thinking about someone else, but it's fine, right?'
Luis and Jay talked for a while, until the morning broke a little more.
After some time, Jay and Luis decided to go together to the library they had visited yesterday with the group.
On the way, Jay walked next to Luis. The weather was still cold in the morning, though the sun was illuminating the city. Luis was attentive to everything, wearing a coat—he tried to make Jay wear one, but his stubbornness led him to go without. Jay walked with his head down, thinking about the conversation with his second father:'I can't judge Luis for killing people. After all…' Jay walked, his black hair swaying. 'I did the same, following the orders of assassins who failed their missions.'
Flashbacks invaded his mind.
"How could you do that?!" The girl stepped back. "Why did you kill him? Tell me, why?!" Tears ran down her face. "Tell me why you did it?"
"It's… it's part of the job," Gabriel stood up, his suit soaked in blood, holding a knife dripping blood. His eyes filled with water as he spoke, scared.
"Don't come closer." Gabriel tried to approach the girl. "Stay away from me, y-you monster."
Gabriel stopped and looked at his blood-stained hands, then lifted his head to see the girl. The distance increased even while he stood still.
"W-wait, no." He knelt, begging forgiveness for what he did. "I-I'm sorry, please don't leave me." Tears streamed down.
"Never come near me or my daughter again, you monster!"
Gabriel released his sadness. Crying and curled up, he began hearing a voice calling his name, starting faintly and growing louder. Finally, he heard it clearly:"Jay!"
It was as if it were shouted into his ear. He put his hand to his ear, looking at Luis, who was puzzled."Huh?! What happened? Are we there already?" Jay asked, looking around."You froze suddenly and kept apologizing in a low voice," Luis said, slightly concerned. "Seriously, what's going on with you?"
"It's n-nothing!"'This memory affected me so much?! To the point of trembling!'
Still, Jay wanted to continue toward the library. They walked until they arrived.
Inside, Jay searched for a book, his mind focused on one thought:'Where is it?'
He searched every shelf until he found it.'Found it! This was the book she was reading!'
Our romantic went to the counter, where Luis also had a book."Even you are picking one?!" he asked, surprised.
With a smile, Luis replied, "Of course, I'm not leaving here empty-handed."
Jay handed the book over, pointed to who would pay, and went outside. Luis quickly paid for his book.
As he stepped outside, the ground began to shake."An earthquake?" Luis wondered."No, this isn't an earthquake, it's a…" Before he could finish, a yellow flash cut across the sky, falling outside the wall. Jay felt a tightness in his heart, breathing heavy, sweating as he saw something gigantic with a murderous glare and smoke emanating from its body.
It gripped the wall in front of it with force.
Luis looked at Jay hopelessly and said,"This is the end of our peace and…" He dropped the book. "…the beginning of hell."