In many societies, especially in South Asia, religion and honor are deeply woven into the cultural fabric. While both can be sources of strength, faith, and community, they can also be misused to justify silence—particularly when it comes to abuse.
Children suffer in silence not because the truth is unclear, but because speaking up is considered dishonorable, disrespectful, or sinful. This chapter explores how cultural and religious norms can protect abusers instead of victims—and how that must change.
1. Misusing Religion to Silence Victims
Religion is meant to guide people toward justice, compassion, and protection of the vulnerable. But in many cases, abusers use spiritual authority or religious teachings to:
Shame victims into silence
Frame abuse as a "test of faith" or punishment
Teach obedience over self-protection
Use sacred roles (e.g., imam, priest, elder) to avoid accountability
Label reporting as "backbiting" or "disrespecting elders"
In such environments, children are taught to submit—even when harmed.
> Silence becomes a spiritual burden, not a form of healing.
2. Honor Culture and the Fear of Shame
In many families, especially traditional or conservative ones, "izzat" (honor) is valued above all else. Protecting the family's image is often prioritized over the child's safety.
Common reactions include:
"Don't talk about this—it will ruin our reputation."
"People will stop marrying into our family if this gets out."
"No one will believe you, and we will be humiliated."
This leads to:
Victim-blaming
Forced forgiveness or reconciliation
Threats of social exclusion
Abusers being protected for the sake of family unity
3. The Psychological Cost of Silence
Children who are forced to stay silent may experience:
Deep internalized shame and guilt
Confusion about their worth and identity
Emotional breakdowns, depression, or anxiety
Loss of faith or spiritual detachment
Feeling betrayed by those they were taught to trust
They begin to believe that their pain is a sin—or worse, that it never mattered at all.
4. When Communities Enable Abuse
Entire communities can unintentionally enable abuse by:
Prioritizing the reputation of institutions over children
Discouraging legal action "to keep the peace"
Shaming survivors for "bringing dishonor"
Protecting respected individuals at the expense of truth
This silence is not piety—it is complicity. When religion or culture is used to conceal abuse, it betrays its own moral foundation.
5. Faith as a Force for Protection
True religious teachings emphasize:
Justice over silence
The protection of the weak over the comfort of the powerful
Truth-telling over fear of gossip
Compassion, healing, and accountability
Faith can—and should—be a refuge, not a prison. Survivors deserve a path to spiritual peace, not isolation.
6. Breaking Free from Cultural Chains
To end abuse, families and communities must:
Separate honor from silence
Acknowledge that abuse can happen anywhere—even in "good" homes
Create spaces where victims can speak without fear
Hold every individual accountable, regardless of status or title
Teach children that their safety is sacred, not shameful
Conclusion
No religion condones abuse. No culture should protect it.
Silence in the name of honor only allows more children to be harmed—and more lives to be lost in silence.
Let your faith stand with the oppressed. Let your honor be in protecting the innocent, not preserving appearances.
> "True faith stands with the oppressed, not the powerful who harm them."