After what felt like an eternity of trudging through creepy underground tunnels—each room somehow darker, smellier, and more suspicious than the last—they finally saw it. Stairs. Leading up.
It was beautiful. Glorious. Possibly divine.
Earlier, in one of the less horrifying chambers, they had stumbled across a pile of confiscated belongings. Their weapons, supplies, and most importantly, their spirit transmission jades. Linyue had picked hers up with quiet relief. Her spiritual energy was slowly returning, and her body no longer felt like overcooked tofu.
She turned to Prince Lu and held out her hand. "Spirit transmission jade."
Prince Lu blinked. "What—why?"
"So we don't get stuck down here forever, obviously."
He muttered under his breath about "bossy women" and "stealing my princely authority," but in the end, slapped the jade into her palm.
Linyue activated it, and instantly a panicked voice burst through, loud enough to echo down the tunnel.
"PRINCE! Where are you?! Are you alright? Did they take your clothes again?!"
Prince Lu's entire face turned crimson. "WHAT—WHY IS THAT THE FIRST QUESTION?!"
He Yuying coughed delicately into his sleeve. "Probably because it's… a pattern?"
Song Meiyu choked on a laugh, "Wait—AGAIN?!"
Even Shen Zhenyu's serious face twitched, his lips pressing into a thin line that betrayed the battle between composure and laughter.
Linyue glanced at Prince Lu. "So… how often does this happen?"
"NEVER!" Prince Lu yelled, clutching the jade. "It happened ONE time! And this doesn't count!"
From the jade came his guard's voice—calm, factual, and utterly betraying him. "It already happened three times."
Silence fell. A long, heavy silence that seemed to echo more than the yelling had.
Then Song Meiyu let out a squeaky giggle and whispered, "Ohhh, so is this the fourth time?"
"Five if we count the pants giving up on life earlier," He Yuying added with a straight face.
"STOP COUNTING!" Prince Lu roared, his voice echoing off the stone walls until even the rats were probably laughing at him.
His face burned so red it looked like it might glow in the dark. Desperate to salvage what little respect he had left, he cleared his throat and spoke into the jade with an exaggerated calm that fooled no one. "Listen carefully. I'm in the doll store. Underground."
There was a confused pause from the other end. Then his guard shouted back, horrified. "WHAT?! We searched that place earlier! Even King Shu's people scoured it top to bottom! But nobody found anything!"
"That's because you searched outside," Prince Lu said, enunciating each word very slowly. "We're inside. Underground. We already found the stairs. Just wait in the store and—" He glanced around at the eerie tunnel walls. The faint smell of mold clung to the air, mixed with something sickly sweet that made his stomach churn. His mouth tightened. "—and don't touch anything creepy."
Song Meiyu tilted her head, muttering just loud enough for everyone to hear. "That leaves… what? Nothing?"
Even Shen Zhenyu's stoic mask cracked, his mouth twitching at the corners.
Prince Lu groaned and dragged a hand over his face. The heavens clearly wanted him to die of humiliation before the enemy even had the chance.
Then, faint through the jade, his guard whispered as though to someone standing nearby. "Does… does this mean the prince lost his clothes underground this time?"
Prince Lu screamed. "THAT'S IT! I'M FIRING ALL OF YOU WHEN I GET OUT!"
Linyue, already halfway up the stairs, called down without turning her head. "You should probably focus on putting your pants on first before firing anyone."
Song Meiyu snorted so hard she nearly missed a step. "Oh no—don't make me laugh here. I'll roll back down and take you all with me!"
Even Shen Zhenyu, who rarely let anything ruffle his composure, looked suspiciously like he was biting his lip to keep a laugh in.
"STOP TALKING ABOUT MY PANTS!" Prince Lu roared.
"Understood!" the guard's voice on the jade turned stiff, overly formal now. "We'll handle the shopkeeper. Just focus on your… pants."
Prince Lu angrily deactivated the jade.
They kept climbing. The stairs creaked ominously under their feet. Finally, the narrow stairwell opened up into a familiar room—dim, stuffy, and oddly warm.
Song Meiyu stopped in her tracks. "This is where we passed out." Her nose wrinkled in disgust. "Still smells like regret. And feet. Mostly feet."
They looked around. No doors. No windows. Just four stained walls and the grimy floor they had all collapsed on earlier.
"How do we go out?" Song Meiyu asked, spinning in a slow circle.
"We fell down," Linyue said simply. "We just have to go up."
The group paused. Then, as though pulled by the same thought, Song Meiyu and Linyue both turned their heads. Their eyes landed on the three other unfortunate souls trapped in the room.
Prince Lu, still half-naked and wrapped in the shreds of his dignity, puffed up his chest. "Why are you looking at me like that?" he snapped. "I'm a prince!"
Shen Zhenyu rubbed his temple, his patience was already running thin.
He Yuying, however, was taking this very seriously. He squinted thoughtfully, then pointed at Prince Lu with a face of pure logic. "He's taller than me."
Prince Lu's eyes narrowed dangerously. "I said I'm a prince!"
"Yes, yes," Linyue said calmly, looking up at the ceiling. "Your royal highness. Now help me figure out how to poke our way out of here."
Song Meiyu folded her arms, her grin far too mischievous. "You're the tallest. It's your destiny."
"It is NOT my destiny to be a ladder!" Prince Lu yelled.
He Yuying raised a hand thoughtfully. "Well, technically, being born tall in this situation does make you the ladder."
"STOP TALKING!" Prince Lu flailed his arms so wildly that his traitorous pants nearly abandoned him again.
Deep down, they all knew. They had escaped a human puppet lab, fought a giant man, blinded him on the way, and uncovered horrifying scrolls of doom. Of course, the final boss would be... a ceiling.
Prince Lu crossed his arms and lifted his chin. "Listen here, all of you. I am the prince of Luyan! The blood of kings flows in these veins. My ancestors ruled from golden thrones. I—"
"—am about to become a golden ladder," He Yuying interrupted.
"I REFUSE!" Prince Lu snapped, stomping a foot hard enough to make the floor groan. His pants slipped again, and he barely caught them in time.
Song Meiyu snorted into her sleeve, laughter bubbling out despite her best attempt to hide it.
Linyue tilted her head, entirely unbothered. "Your refusal has been noted… and ignored. Congratulations on your promotion to golden ladder, Your Highness."
Shen Zhenyu pinched the bridge of his nose, already weary of the inevitable. "We're really doing this? We're actually doing this."
Song Meiyu clapped her hands together, eyes sparkling with mischief. "Alright! Human ladder time!" She turned to Prince Lu with a bright grin. "Don't worry, I'm light. And also very good at climbing people."
"Don't say it like that!" Prince Lu started, but his protest died as Song Meiyu darted forward. She scrambled up his side and perched herself onto his shoulders. Prince Lu staggered, arms flailing.
"STOP. I AM A PRIN—why are you on my shoulders?!"
"Stable base! Now hold still!" Song Meiyu said cheerfully, standing precariously on his shoulders.
Prince Lu's teeth ground together. "Why do I feel like my ancestors are judging me?"
"Because they are," He Yuying replied from below, boosting Shen Zhenyu up next.
Within moments, the group had formed the most unstable tower in history. Prince Lu at the bottom, legs shaking as he muttered about treason and lost dignity. Song Meiyu perched on top of him, fingertips stretching for the ceiling. Shen Zhenyu clung to her ankle with grim determination, as though brute seriousness alone might stabilize her. And He Yuying, the picture of laziness, casually propped them all up with one hand.
"This is the dumbest plan in history," Prince Lu growled through gritted teeth.
The ceiling above them gave a groan as Song Meiyu pressed harder. "I think it's loose! Just a little more—AHHHH!"
The tower swayed violently. Song Meiyu windmilled her arms. Shen Zhenyu's stoic expression cracked as he grabbed her leg tighter. Prince Lu made a noise somewhere between a squawk and a death cry.
"THIS IS BENEATH ME! LITERALLY BENEATH ME!"
"Hold it! Almost there!" Shen Zhenyu barked, his usual calm tone had risen to something dangerously close to panic.
There was a final shove. The ceiling panel popped open with a loud crack.
Song Meiyu let out a victorious squeal. "WE'RE FREE!"
Her joy lasted exactly three seconds before gravity remembered its job. The entire human ladder collapsed in a very undignified heap.