As soon as Zhou Yu finished speaking, Luo Shiyu—who was sitting across from me—chimed in, adding insult to injury: "Ugh, don't talk about those guys in front of me. I won't be able to eat if you do."
What the hell? How much do you hate us guys?
Talking to them made me simmer with anger inside more than once, but I couldn't stand up for myself or my buddies. I could only sit there and watch in silence.
After eating and drinking for a while, I felt full and got up to go to the bathroom.
Thankfully, this was just a regular hot pot restaurant—no separate men's and women's restrooms.
Once inside, I stood in front of a squat toilet, habitually pulling down my zipper to pee.
Suddenly, it hit me: I was in a woman's body now. If I stood up to pee, I'd soak my pants. Realizing that, I quickly pulled down my pants and squatted.
Ugh, such a hassle.
I had just squatted down when I heard someone walk into the bathroom.
Thud, thud.
"Who the hell's in there? Get the hell out!"
It was a man's voice, and his words were slurred—he was definitely drunk.
Dammit, I hate guys who get drunk and start causing trouble. They're unreasonable, and they act like thugs.
Whoever was in the other stall must have been scared too, because no one opened the door. But the next second, the door to my stall started getting banged hard.
"Who the hell's in there? Hurry up and get out! I gotta pee!"
I stared at the shadow under the door. I was angry, but I held it in. I couldn't take him on, so the least I could do was avoid him, right?
So I stayed quiet, hoping he'd leave when he saw the door wouldn't open.
But as the saying goes, whatever you're afraid of, it'll always happen.
The guy started kicking the door, yelling as he did: "Hurry up and get the hell out! I need to pee!"
Pee my ass! Get lost!
I wanted to snap at him like that, but I was scared it would make him even angrier. So I hurried to finish what I was doing, then pulled up my pants and prepared to leave.
"Coming! Coming!" I called out angrily, opened the door, and stepped out.
Standing outside was a man in his forties. He was bald, had a pig-like face, and his cheeks were bright red. The stench of alcohol coming off him was overpowering, and his body was shaped like a gourd—who knew how much food he'd wasted.
When he saw me, he snickered and said, "Well, I'll be damned. Didn't expect a hot chick to be hiding in here."
With that, he reached out his right hand, grabbed my arm, and said, "Babe, come on. I'll pay for your company tonight. Is two thousand yuan enough?"
Are you kidding me? I may be in a woman's body, but I've got a guy's heart. I don't swing that way!
I yanked my arm out hard. I didn't want to deal with this guy—afraid the more I talked to him, the more he'd cling to me. So as soon as I freed my arm, I headed straight for the bathroom door, planning to wash my hands and leave.
But I'd barely taken a step when he grabbed me again, shouting: "Babe, don't run! If two thousand isn't enough, make it four! As long as you keep me company tonight, money's no problem."
That did it—I was furious.
Without a word, I wrenched my hand out of the bald guy's grip, turned around, and kicked him hard in the stomach.
The guy was already drunk, and he didn't see the kick coming. He stumbled backward, fell to the floor, and leaned against the wall, clutching his stomach and groaning in pain.
I rushed out, washed my hands, and ran. I knew full well that people who come to hot pot restaurants usually don't come alone. If I didn't leave fast, his friends would corner me—and I'd be done for.
When I got back to the private room, I finally let out a sigh of relief. I acted like nothing had happened and kept eating and drinking with Luo Shiyu and the others.
After a while, I started feeling really hot. It was unavoidable—there was garlic, ginger, and chili in the dipping sauce, plus the gas stove under the hot pot. With heat from inside and out, how could I not feel hot?
I was sweating, and my clothes stuck to my skin, making me feel sticky. Back when I was a guy, it would've been fine—I could just hike up my shirt to cool down. But now that I was a woman? I couldn't do that! And my bra was sticking to me too, digging into my skin. It was so uncomfortable.
I groaned inwardly: Why do women put themselves through this? Ugh, being a guy is so much better.
When I was full, I sat on my stool to rest for a bit and ate some snacks.
"Hey, Ke'er, you eat so much—how do you never gain weight?" Zhou Yu asked.
As she spoke, she reached out and gently pinched the little bit of fat on her stomach. "Look at me. I'm almost as fat as a pig."
To be honest, she wasn't fat at all—her weight was definitely within the normal range. But that's how girls are, though. Even a little extra fat makes them say they're fat. They'd be happy if they were as skinny as skeletons.
So this is how I answered her question: "You shouldn't call yourself whatever you think you look like. You're too honest."
Lin Yuqiao burst out laughing. Luo Shiyu's lips twitched into a smile, but she quickly suppressed it.
Zhou Yu glared at me, eyes wide. "Ke'er, we're done being friends!"
I chuckled and didn't take it seriously.
As I spoke, I picked up the last sweet tamarind.
"Hey, Ke'er, I want a sweet tamarind too," Luo Shiyu said to me.
By the time she spoke, I'd already put the tamarind in my mouth—half of it still sticking out.
I held up the empty plate and shrugged, meaning there were none left.
Then I handed the empty plate to Zhou Yu, signaling for her to go get more sweet tamarinds.
But Luo Shiyu said, "Forget it. Don't ask her. Hey, don't move your mouth—I want the one you're eating."
Hmm?
I turned to her, eyes wide, staring at Luo Shiyu in shock.
She stood up and walked over to me.
I panicked, thinking: What the hell? Seriously? I already have it in my mouth, and you still want it?
Between guys, that would be such a weird sight—I wouldn't even want to look. But between girls? It seemed totally normal.
Sitting on the stool, I stared straight at Luo Shiyu as she walked closer. My heart raced, and I started inching my body to the side.
Luo Shiyu sat down next to me, then leaned in toward my face, her mouth open.
Dammit, she's really doing this.
She'd had quite a bit to drink, so her cheeks were flushed—she looked really pretty. As she leaned in, her warm, alcohol-scented breath brushed lightly against my face. My cheeks burned instantly, and my heart started pounding.
Dammit! I've been single for so many years, and no girl has ever teased me like this.
Luo Shiyu's nose was almost touching mine. I watched as she opened her mouth slightly, bit the other end of the tamarind, and crunch—she bit it in half.
For a split second, she looked at me, and I looked at her. We were so close, staring at each other. The air felt weirdly tense.
I sat there, still reeling from the excitement and thrill. She sat up straight, pulling away from me, chewed the tamarind in her mouth, and acted like nothing had happened—she didn't care at all.
After she finished eating, she saw me still sitting there, dumbfounded. "Why are you staring at me like that?"
I snapped back to my senses, quickly bit down on the remaining half of the tamarind, swallowed it, and said, "N-Nothing. Nothing."
I even picked up a glass of wine and downed it to calm my nerves.
When I looked at Luo Shiyu again, she was smiling faintly, and her gaze was strange—hard to read.
I quickly looked away, too scared to meet her eyes, in case she noticed something was off.
We chatted for a little while longer in the private room. Once we all felt rested enough, we got up to leave.
After we left the hot pot restaurant, Zhou Yu said she was going back to the dorm, and Lin Yuqiao was going to meet her boyfriend. I wanted to go back too—I needed to see who was in my body.
But just as I was about to leave, Luo Shiyu hooked her arm through mine and asked, "Where are you going?"
"I'm going back to the dorm," I said.
"Back to the dorm? Didn't you promise me something earlier? Did you forget?" Luo Shiyu asked.
I froze. I had no idea what Xu Ke'er had promised Luo Shiyu.
But since she'd said that, I figured I'd go along with it. "Fine, I'll walk around with you a little longer." I thought: When two girls hang out, the only thing they do besides wandering around the street aimlessly is… well, nothing else. It's not like a guy and a girl, where after walking around for a while you might go get a hotel room.
Sure enough, Luo Shiyu kept her arm linked with mine and wandered aimlessly down the street.
As a professional bachelor, I really couldn't understand girls who loved shopping. They clearly weren't going to buy anything, but they still insisted on walking around the streets. What's the point?
And if you're going to walk around, why go into stores, look here and there, give the salespeople hope, then dash it?
After a while, Luo Shiyu took me to a night market and said she wanted to get something to eat.
I suddenly noticed: Luo Shiyu was cold to everyone else—even her roommate Zhou Yu. But with me, or rather, with Xu Ke'er (the original owner of this body), she always had a smile on her face, like she was really happy.
Once we got to the night market, she bought us both double-skin milk and mung bean juice.
After paying, we turned around to leave.
But as soon as we did, we bumped into someone. Anyone who's been to a night market knows how crowded they are—bumping into people is normal.
So I immediately apologized.
But when I saw who it was, I cursed inwardly: Dammit! It's that bald guy from the hot pot restaurant!
And this time, he wasn't alone. He had two other guys with him, both in their thirties or forties.
Shit. I'm so unlucky.