I'm going to nail this chick."
I muttered while looking at the baby bird perched on that tree.
After carefully positioning the final nail above the delicate birdhouse I was building, I climbed down the ladder and gazed at the tree beside my house. The birdhouse, with its red roof and brown wooden walls, now stood there neatly.
I let out a sigh of relief.
"Don't you dare chirp at my window again," I said.
Yes, I built the birdhouse only so I wouldn't be disturbed while working in my room. That bird had been a real nuisance with its endless chirping.
The little blue bird tilted its head as if nodding before hopping into its brand-new home.
Turning around, I walked back toward my house. My home was simple. I lived there with my younger sister. She could be very annoying, honestly. Luckily, my room was upstairs while hers was on the first floor.
Our parents were always busy working either out of town or abroad. Honestly, I never complained, mostly because they often sent us large sums of money. Thanks to that, I could buy plenty of skins and items in my favorite games.
I grabbed the doorknob of our front door, took a breath, then pushed it open. The living room greeted me: white walls, a long sofa in the middle, and a flat-screen TV playing some random quiz show.
I didn't care much. I had work to do.
Then suddenly, a muffled voice echoed from the kitchen. Despite the muffling, I immediately recognized it.
A bitchy voice
When I entered the kitchen, what I found was… surprising. My younger sister was stuck halfway inside the refrigerator, legs flailing.
"Help, step bro! I'm stuck!" she shouted.
I sighed and rubbed my temples. What stupid shit was she pulling this time? Couldn't I get a single day of peace from her antics?
"First of all, I'm your real brother, not some step-bro cliché. Second… HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET STUCK IN THERE?!" I yelled, scratching my head.
"Waaah! I just wanted the last soda! How was I supposed to know I'd get stuck? Help me out already!" she whined, wiggling around.
I narrowed my eyes. Clearly, she wasn't actually stuck. She was just messing with me. If she really had been, maybe I'd believe it. But she was slim, there was no way she couldn't pull herself out. She was just trying to tease me.
"That's what you get for overeating, dummy. You're getting fatter day by day," I said.
"No way! My weight hasn't changed at all!" she snapped. Silence fell for a moment. I didn't respond, just to make her squirm. "...Maybe just a little…"
I sighed.
"Whatever. I'm going upstairs. Bye." I turned to leave.
Suddenly, she screamed.
"Waaa! Don't just leave me like this!"
"No shit! You can get out by yourself, idiot. Why should I help?" I folded my arms, watching her.
"Waaaah! Come on! Don't tell me the only reason you won't help me is because… you're planning something indecent?! like in those Animal Videos?!" she gasped dramatically, her acting surprisingly good. Maybe she should consider being an actress.
Grinding my teeth, I crouched down and grabbed her by the waist. Her tank top left part of her stomach exposed, so my hand brushed against her skin.
She froze. "Bro?!"
Then… tickle, tickle.
I dug my fingers into her side. A loud thud rang out from inside the fridge as she jerked in surprise.
"SHHAHAHAHA! STOP! STOP!" She squirmed, trying to escape the tickling, and without realizing it, she slipped out of the fridge completely.
I kept tickling her as she collapsed onto the floor, writhing around. Her eyes welled up, and her hands grabbed at mine.
"Stop! Stop already, damn it!" she cried.
Finally, I let her go. She gasped for air like she was trying to refill her lungs all at once.
I looked at her, her shoulder-length black hair shimmered just like mine, her violet eyes came from our mother's side, and her fair skin was flawless. Honestly, I had to admit, we were both lucky to be born with good genetics.
At home, she wore whatever she liked, usually something casual like a tank top. Outside, though, she was like a different person. Graceful, elegant, the picture of a well-mannered young lady.
"You're unbelievable! All I wanted was a little help!" she shouted, glaring at me with teary eyes.
I smirked. "Hey, I did help you. Proof's right there, you're out of the fridge. You should be thanking me," I said proudly.
She shot me a glare, then stood up and marched right in front of me. I was taller by about ten centimeters, so I had to tilt my head slightly to meet her eyes.
Unfortunately for me, from that angle I could also see her cleavage. My eyes stung as I forced myself to look away. With a groan, I brushed past her, heading to get some water to clear my throat.
Bam!
A sharp pain hit the back of my knee, nearly making me fall. I spun around quickly and saw her leg raised, she had kicked me.
"Bleeehh!" She stuck out her tongue and pulled down her lower eyelid, mocking me as I steadied myself on the table.
"You little brat!!" I shouted, ready to chase her, but she dashed off and slammed the kitchen door shut. My chase ended before it even began, and I gave up.
Sighing, I scratched my head. This was just a normal day for us. Honestly, I'd count myself lucky if she didn't pull at least one batshit crazy stunt. Once, she even stuffed all her underwear into my desk drawer, snapped a picture, and sent it to my Mom. Within minutes, my Mom had called demanding an explanation.
What kind of stupid-ass prank was that? After that, I started locking my room so she couldn't sneak in anymore.
Ah, forget it. Better to just drink some water and get back to studying. I needed to work toward my future. My biggest dream was simple.
Financial freedom.
-------------
"i'm having a fucking brain aneurysm."
I clicked my pen against the desk, the sound sharp and repetitive, while staring at my laptop screen.
Right now, I was facing the final boss of my peaceful school life. The one feared by almost everyone my age.
Differential equations.
Damn it! I couldn't understand a single thing this guy was explaining. Honestly, I wanted to end this study session and just slack off, either play some games or doomscroll on my bed.
But I couldn't. Well, it wasn't that I couldn't, it was that I didn't want to. Because I wanted to know how it felt to be rich, to travel abroad every week without ever worrying about money.
Why was I so obsessed with money and freedom, you ask? I don't even fucking know why. Maybe because of something my unc once said. Words that might've brainwashed me.
"Work hard, make money, and you'll be able to buy anything. And if you're lucky, maybe all that wealth plus that handsome face of yours, will attract a cosplayer who'll dress up as your favorite waifu just for you."
That was what my unc told me ten minutes before he got sent to the hospital, after getting his ass beaten up by debt collectors pissed off at his never-ending debts. Luckily, my kind-hearted mother paid off his debts, though the price was a year of cutting down our family expenses.
Setting aside my idiot unc… Honestly, when I first heard those words as a middle schooler, my dumb chuunibyou brain sparked with strange ideas. Ever since then, I tried leaving laziness behind. I cut down on gaming and free time, and started grinding at life.
I learned all kinds of skills—drawing, photography, writing novels, design, editing, you name it. But I never went past beginner or intermediate level in any of them. For some reason, after one to three months of learning something, I always felt the urge to switch to something else.
You could call me a jack of all trades, master of none. Yeah, that fit me perfectly.
And right now, my only goal was to enter the number one university in the country. I really wanted a good job here, in this country where opportunities were rare. The odds were low since unemployed motherfuckers were everywhere while job openings were almost nonexistent.
You know what's funny? In that country starting with an "A," with the bald eagle as its symbol, they made memes about job applications, running from them like they were some terrifying monster.
Ironically, here in my country, those job applications were the real monsters. A single sheet of that paper was already hard to come by. And our so-called leader once promised nineteen million job opportunities for the people. Fucking bullshit. Instead, all he did was raise the salaries of his officials.
Not to mention the corruption, the bribes, the law bending before those in power. Do you know people here even started waving the One Piece pirate flag. You know, Luffy's jolly roger? Yeah, I did too. But the very next day, police ripped it down. Apparently, the higher-ups moved fast to ban everyone from waving that flag. Damn it! If I could, I'd burn this crumbling country down myself!
My body suddenly jolted as if electrocuted.
"The fuck?" I muttered.
What the hell was that? Why was I ranting about all this crap? Sure, I hated this country, but not enough to start cursing it like that. It felt like I'd been possessed by something.
My bad… ahem. Anyway, instead of thinking about this wreck of a nation, I should focus on studying. Knowledge is power. I'd get stronger, then leave this place behind, move my whole family somewhere actually livable.
Shaking my head, I refocused on my laptop.
Maybe I should just switch to an Indian guy's channel. For some reason, those Indian tutors always had such iconic voices, and they made everything easier to understand.
I took a sip of soda, went into "locked-in mode," and stared at the laptop in my anime-poster-filled room.
My pen scribbled fast as the Indian guy explained. My brain soaked it all in with ease.
Until suddenly, a loud noise came from the side of my desk.
Bzzzt. Bzzzt.
I snapped out of my locked-in state and frowned, turning to the right. Who the hell was interrupting me? Could it be my annoying little sister, pranking me with phone calls from downstairs? If it was, I swear to god I wouldn't cook for her again.
I picked up my cracked phone and turned it on. The caller's name flashed on the screen.
BenDoverYoAss.
What the hell did this bastard want?
I hesitated before swiping the green button. Finally, with a sigh, I answered.
The moment I held the phone to my ear, a loud, irritating voice blasted through.
"Keep going, I'm almost there!" shouted a guy on the other end.
My face hardened instantly, my brows furrowing so much they nearly touched my nose. I probably looked like I'd just seen that same naked lunatic I'd seen before on the street, the kind of sight that left me feeling sick every time i remembered it
Enough about that guy. Back to the present. What the fuck did I just hear? What kind of degenerate shit was this guy doing while calling me?!
"You're a degenerate, Ben," I said flatly.
"Ah! Ezra!" Ben yelled through the phone when he heard my voice.
"I'm hanging up." I pulled the phone away from my ear, about to press the red button.
"Wait, wait, what! Why are you hanging up? I just called you!" Ben shouted.
"Because—" Before I could finish, another voice cut through.
"Ahh~ it's all out now." Ben groaned with disgusting pleasure through the line.
Yeah, i can't fucking take this anymore. Time to end this call before my ears and brain melted into sludge.