The first thing I felt was pain.
It wasn't sharp, like a cut or a bruise—it was the kind that sank into your bones, a deep, relentless ache that made me wonder if I'd ever feel normal again. Every joint, every muscle screamed at me the moment I tried to shift beneath the sheets. Even breathing hurts.
When I opened my eyes, I almost wished I hadn't. The morning light filtering through the curtains didn't feel warm or safe—it felt cruel, mocking me with its brightness. The air was thick with his scent, roses drowned in smoke, clinging to every corner of the room. To my skin. To my hair. To my lungs. I gagged on it. No matter how much I wanted to, I couldn't escape it.
I was completely naked from head to toe. Bruised everywhere. Bitten mark scattered across my body.
I tried to sit up, but the effort ripped a cry from my throat. My arms gave out, and I collapsed back onto the mattress, chest heaving, eyes stinging with tears. The sheets were damp, twisted around my legs, sticky with sweat and pheromones that didn't belong to me. His presence lingered like chains shackled to my body.
Flashes of last night struck me all at once.
The burn of his pheromones flooded my senses, drowning me until I couldn't think.
The weight of him pressing me down, caging me in, suffocating me.
The words whispered into my ear—each one a blade sinking deeper than the last.
Mine.
You'll obey me.
Your body, your womb—it's all mine.
I clenched my fists, nails biting into my palms, but the trembling wouldn't stop. My whole body quaked, not just from the exhaustion but from the sheer terror still coiled inside me.
I wanted to scream. To tear the sheets apart. To rip my own skin off if it meant erasing his scent, his touch, the memory of his control. My hands clawed at my arms, scratching red lines into the skin, but it didn't matter. No matter how hard I scrubbed, his pheromones were there—suffocating, branded into me.
Tears welled up before I could stop them, sliding hot and fast down my face. My throat burned from screams. I didn't even remember much, but the fact that he continuously tormented me non-stop.
I had told myself, so many times, that I was strong enough. That no matter what Hyok did, no matter how cruel he became, I wouldn't break.
But lying there in the ruined bed, aching and hollow, I realized I'd been wrong.
Because I hadn't fought back.
Not really.
I'd let the fear consume me, freeze me, pin me down even before he touched me.
And that was worse than the pain.
Worse than the bruises blooming under my skin or the soreness that wouldn't let me move.
The worst part was that he had stolen something I thought I'd never lose—my will.
I turned my head to the side, staring blankly at the wall, at nothing, at everything. My breath hitched as the truth pressed down on me, heavier than his body ever could.
Hyok hadn't just destroyed me last night.
He had hollowed me out, piece by piece, until I was left with nothing but the echo of his voice in my skull.
And I hated myself most of all… because some part of me knew this wasn't the end.
This was only the beginning.
I don't know how long I lay there. The minutes bled into hours, every second stretched thin by the ache in my body and the weight pressing down on my chest. But eventually, I couldn't stay in that bed anymore. The sheets reeked of him, suffocating me with every shallow breath I took.
I needed to get out.
With a shaky breath, I forced my hands flat against the mattress and pushed. My arms trembled violently, my muscles screaming in protest, but I managed to sit up halfway before collapsing back down, sweat dripping down my temple. My body wasn't just sore—it felt ruined, gutted from the inside out.
"Move," I whispered to myself, though my throat was raw, the word cracked and broken. "You have to move."
It took three more tries before I finally swung my legs off the bed. The cold floor stung against my bare feet, but it grounded me, just enough to force my body upright. My knees buckled the moment I put weight on them, and I clutched the nightstand for support, knuckles white as I dragged myself forward.
Every step was a battle. My vision blurred, my breaths shallow and ragged, but I stumbled toward the door anyway, one hand pressed to the wall to keep me steady. Each inch of progress was agony, but the thought of staying in that room, trapped in Hyok's scent, was worse than the pain.
When I finally reached the hallway, the cool air hit me like a slap. My body shivered, but I kept moving, dragging myself step by step. I didn't even know where I was going. All I knew was away. Away from him. Away from the room that still echoed with his voice.
But my body had limits, and I'd already pushed past them. By the time I reached the end of the hall, my vision had gone spotty, black dots dancing across the edges of my sight. My legs gave out beneath me, and I crumpled to the floor, clutching at my chest as panic clawed up my throat.
As time passed by, I was already on the street all damaged like an object and wrapped myself in a blanket. My foot became sore and I was feeling immense pain. I wanted to stop, but I was afraid to go through the same hell hole again. My vision blurred and I felt like I was going to faint any moment but I didn't.
That's when I heard it—footsteps.
"Dohyun?" The voice was sharp, worried. A familiar voice.
I forced my head up and through the haze I saw him—Jihwa. His eyes widened in shock as he rushed toward me, dropping to his knees at my side.
"God, what happened to you?" His hands hovered over me, afraid to touch, afraid I'd break further if he did. But when my body swayed, he caught me, pulling me against his chest.
The moment his arms wrapped around me, I collapsed completely. My body went limp, the fight draining out of me in an instant. My face pressed into his shoulder, and before I could stop them, tears spilled freely, soaking into his shirt.
"I… I can't…" The words broke apart on my tongue, barely audible. My throat burned, my chest heaved, but nothing else came out.
Jihwa's hand cradled the back of my head, his voice low but steady. "It's okay. You don't have to say it. I'm here. I've got you."
His scent washed over me—light, soothing, utterly different from Hyok's suffocating presence. For the first time since last night, my lungs loosened just enough to breathe.
My body trembled uncontrollably, every nerve raw and exposed, but in Jihwa's arms I felt something I thought I'd lost.
A sliver of safety.
But even as my eyelids fluttered shut and darkness pulled me under, one truth gnawed at the back of my mind.
Hyok wouldn't let this go.
And finding me in Jihwa's arms… would only make him crueler.
"Jihwa…" I said in a low broken voice.
"Yeah? What is it."
"I don't know what to do…I want to escape from this pain and die.."
Jihwa held onto my cheeks.
"Don't just say this nonsense. You can't let whoever is hurting you win. You are capable enough to live a happy life…" A tear drop from his eye gave me a heart ache.
He let go of my cheeks and moved his head away from view. I also wanted to help him, but how can I help him? If I can't help myself?
I noticed tears streaming down from his eyes and without thinking I moved my hand forward trying to wipe them off.
He laughed at me and I laughed too.
There was a minute of silence.
Then everything slowly faded into the colour of black.
When my eyes fluttered open, the first thing I saw wasn't the cracked ceiling or the cold walls I'd grown used to.
It was a smile.
Jihwa's smile. The smile that shines brighter than the stars itself.
He was sitting at my side, leaning slightly forward, as though he had been waiting the whole time for me to wake. His lips curved gently, his eyes softened with warmth that pierced straight through the fog of pain clouding my head.
For a moment, I thought I was still dreaming. That smile—it wasn't forced, nor mocking, nor laced with cruelty like Hyok's ever was. It was genuine. Gentle.
And gods, how long had it been since I'd seen something like that? Since someone had looked at me with kindness instead of ownership?
I blinked, my throat tightening painfully. "Jihwa…?" My voice cracked, raw from disuse and tears.
His smile widened, faint but steady, like sunlight breaking through storm clouds. "You're awake," he said softly, relief flooding his voice. "I was starting to think you'd sleep forever."
I swallowed hard, my chest clenching. I didn't realize until then how much I'd longed for that sight—for the comfort of something so simple, so human. My lips trembled, caught between wanting to cry and wanting to answer his warmth with a smile of my own.
But all I could do was whisper, brokenly, "I've missed that."
Jihwa tilted his head, eyes never leaving mine. "Missed what?"
"Your smile."
The words fell from me before I could stop them, bare and trembling, but the moment they left my lips, I saw Jihwa's expression soften even more. His hand reached out, brushing lightly against mine, grounding me.
"Then I'll keep smiling," he murmured. "As long as it helps you remember that you're not alone."
And as he looked at me, still smiling, I realized just how much I had truly longed for this—someone who saw me not as a possession, not as an omega to be used, but as Dohyun. Just Dohyun.