The rain had stopped some time ago before dawn, its sound replaced by the chirping of birds and the distant noise of cars passing. Broken asphalt had given birth to puddles of water. The night had passed and the storm was gone, but inside Shiv's head, it still raged.
He had been sitting on the edge of his bed after waking up from his nightmare, unable to blink, unable to sleep. Hands on his face, elbows on his knees, his body crumbling onto itself. His breath was shallow, his lungs struggling.
The nightmares clung to him like ants to sugar. Sometimes they came once in a while and sometimes they came daily. But the last one had come a very long time ago—he had almost forgotten that they existed—those fractured glimpses of something known yet unknown. And he always forgot them after waking up, yet some fragments remained.
His thoughts drifted toward the bathroom; glimpses of the night crossed his mind. Dried blood stains were visible on the white floor, and shards of broken glass still littered the ground. The smell of rusted iron still lingered in his mind.
"Just a dream, damn it," he told himself for the countless time.
Then—
Knock. Knock.
The sound jolted him from his monologue.
"Bhaiya (brother)?" A small voice seeped through the wooden door, soft, innocent yet impatient with a tiny bit of anger. "Are you still sleeping? You're taking forever!"
Shiv blinked, throwing his thoughts aside. The corner of his mouth lifted up despite yesterday's event.
"Usha," he muttered under his breath. Shaking his head, he stood up.
"I'm not sleeping," he said, calming his voice.
"Then why aren't you making breakfast?" Her voice grew sharper, bossy in the way only a five-year-old could manage. "I'm starving!"
Shiv dragged his legs toward the door, erasing the last traces of the nightmare from his face. Then opened the door with a click.
And in front of him stood a girl with a round face, her cheeks plump like gulab jamun barely holding on to her small frame. Her black hair was tied in two braids with a few strands loosened free.
Her head tilted up, eyes fixed on her brother, his reflection reflected in her deep black irises. Her arms were folded together, resting on her chest.
"Oh, did I hear anger in your voice!" he said while looking at her, raising an eyebrow. "Are you angry with your Bhaiya (brother)?"
"I… I'm not angry," she said while puffing her already puffed cheeks. She turned her head slightly. "I'm hungry," she mumbled from her puffed mouth.
"Haha…" Shiv giggled, looking at her small frame and bending down on one knee. He lifted her by her shoulders.
"Hehe…" she giggled. "Upsy…"
He didn't make her repeat it twice.
"Once more! Once more!" she asked eagerly.
Shiv's lips tugged upwards. "Didn't you just say that you were hungry?" Usha was still in his hands, raised above his head, her arms and legs stretched like a plane. Her eyes blinked rapidly.
"Did I say that, brother? I don't remember." Her finger rested on her chin as if thinking deeply.
"If I don't remember, then I didn't say that. And if I didn't say that, then we can play…" With each word, her voice turned more and more serious and heavier—at least that's what she tried.
"Oh, Usha, but I did remember," he said, and her shock was visible on her face.
"But… I wan—" Before she could finish, Shiv cut her words and placed her in his arms.
"No buts and ifs," he said and pinched her nose slightly. Her muffled cry escaped her mouth. "Go to the dining table. I'll be there in a few minutes."
He looked at her sadness clearly visible on her face and sighed. "If you wait patiently at the table, then we can play some more."
Usha beamed with happiness. "Yay! Let's play!" Her eyes sparkled and her arms stretched upwards. "And… and I also want you to play after school." Her eyes locked on Shiv, as if beams of stars were hitting him. Under the restless assault of those stars, he simply nodded, accepting his defeat.
.
.
.
.
The kitchen was barely bigger than a desk in an L-shape, and beside it was the hall where the dining table was placed. Usha sat on her chair and Shiv stood in the middle of the kitchen wearing an apron and heating the pan. He had already prepared dough and the stuffing for the parathas and shaped them into round circles.
He spread butter evenly on the pan, then put the paratha on it, cooking it on one side first, then tossing it into the air to cook the other.
"Bhaiya (brother), is it ready?" Usha asked from the table, her tiny legs swinging below.
"It will be done in just a few more minutes," Shiv replied, a few beads of sweat forming on his temple.
"You're slow," a voice reached his ears. Shiv turned his head slightly, looking at Usha.
"Slow?" He smirked. "It's not me who's slow—it's just you who's impatient," Shiv said while flipping the paratha. "And it takes patience to cook something!" Shiv declared.
"But you're still slow," she shot back. "If Uncle was here, he would have cooked breakfast by now," she said.
"I'm not slow. Was it not you who demanded to play upsy?" Shiv shot back.
Usha scrunched her nose. "I think you should turn your attention back to the parathas before they burn."
Shiv snapped his head back and looked at the half-burnt paratha on the pan. "Now I have to eat that," he sighed.
"Hee hee," Usha giggled, her tiny legs swinging like a duck in water.
.
.
.
"Finish your paratha, Usha." Shiv's eyes were on her.
"But I'm full," she protested. An empty bowl of curd sat next to a jar of achar near her plate.
"No buts. Just finish it quickly," his voice stern. "After that, drink the milk."
"If I feel sleepy in class, I'll tell Uncle about it. And blame you." She pouted, trying to look scary—which only made her look more adorable.
"Have you packed your bag and made sure you didn't forget anything?" Shiv asked.
"Hh..!" With a small burp, "I packed my bag last night and I've already checked everything." She slumped back onto her chair, her small belly protruding a little and a small satisfactory grin plastered on her face.
"How was the food, did you like it?" Shiv asked, thinking as if he already knew the answer.
"Hmmm…" Her finger tapped her chin, thinking deeply, and a hand rested on her belly. "It was okay I guess," she said teasingly.
Shiv raised his eyebrows, his voice lowering slightly. He thought she would like the food, but contrary to his expectations, she did not. "I'll make it better next time," disappointment visible in his tone.
"Haha…" Usha burst into laughter. "The parathas were amazing, Bhaiya (brother). I was just teasing you."
"You little devil!" Shiv's face flushed from embarrassment. He raised his hand and placed it on Usha's head, then ruffled her hair.
"Haha…" he laughed. "Take this!"
Laughter echoed at the dining table. The sound of laughter fading every doubt, every uncertainty, every problem that might come in the future.
But now, Shiv wanted nothing more than to live in this moment. Capturing it in his memory forever, never losing it.