Kim remained where he was, unmoving.
Perhaps the sunset made him remember something.
He kept staring at it, recalling every scene of his life.
"Maybe I was a bad husband…" he said.
Her face was directly before him in his memory.
He had not been able to give her anything.
Had he been hiding his love for her?
Trying to be a good person… until life tightened around him and he became what he hated?
Then he cried.
He looked down and said:
"Mother… did you truly want me to be born? Or not?
Perhaps you cursed me in this life… because that is the conclusion I reached in the end.
I am truly a failure."
"But the problem is not where I go…
It is how I return from all the wrong places in which I lost myself.
Again and again, life asks for more than I possess.
I can no longer pay.
Will you accept that I pay with my suffering?
Or is it not worth the price?"
"Many envy me because of my power.
They do not know that I curse it.
What is the use of strength now?
Because of me, my family died… and everyone I loved.
I still remember everyone who mocked me.
I was treated badly in the past,
even though my heart was pure to the furthest extent."
Kim placed his hand over his face and said:
"I will never forget. Never."
Then he stood up.
He moved closer to the edge of the mountain.
He looked down.
Everything below seemed dark from his view—
as if he were staring into an abyss.
He said:
"Even though I know that if you keep staring into the abyss, it will keep staring back at you…
I still do not understand why, when you look into the abyss, it looks back for so long."
A voice came from behind him, from far away:
"Kim… Kim!"
But Kim was lost in thought.
Then—
He woke up.
He found himself inside Nir's house.
He was startled.
Then he saw Nir approaching him, saying:
"Kim, are you okay? You really made me worry about you."
Kim was confused, trying to understand what had happened.
He said he had been near the edge of the mountain…
but he could not remember anything after that.
Nir told him that he had fallen—
but Nir managed to catch him before he could fall completely.
"That's what happened. I was really worried about you.
But… are you alright? Don't push yourself too much."
Kim thanked him and said he was fine, that there was no need to worry.
Then Kim told him that he wanted to sleep.
Just sleep a little.
That was all he wanted.
Nir's eyes widened in surprise.
He said, "Alright," and prepared the bed for him.
He was about to leave to give him privacy.
But inside, Nir felt uneasy.
This was the first time Kim had ever asked to sleep.
He was not used to seeing him asleep,
or resting at all.
As Kim lay there,
there were many tears inside his closed eyes.
He had not cried—
but he had been on the verge of breaking.