I didn't care to try and explain myself being caught, I had anticipated that there was a chance of me being discovered. A veteran's senses must not be underestimated. The old hag looked at me the same way she had with those men.
Now, I am being forcefully dragged further into the hall. Her grip on my arm, tight, as she lead me somewhere into these dark passages.
"You've let your curiosity bested you and what has that benefited?", she glanced back at me as I tried to ease her tight grip. I didn't dare answer back.
"I do not know how you infiltrated both of my offices and found the entrances but I know you're a smart kid. Are you actually a spy sent here to sabotage me? Someone so young, what has the world come to", she lectured but her grip tightened more that I could feel the bone in my arm bruising me from the inside. I stopped her hand.
"Your scent! I followed your scent, grandmother", I reasoned and she stopped on her track looking back at me demanding more answers.
"I couldn't sleep well then I saw you from outside my window. Admittedly, I was curious. You reek of alcohol, that's how I followed you into the office but you were already gone. I don't know what happened then, I just followed my gut and it led me to turning a sculpture near the bookshelf that exposed another room. The carpet was off, so I lifted it up and saw a door partly opened, I went inside and it led me here". I pleaded honestly. She stared at me awhile but I couldn't figure out what she must be thinking so I looked away.
She didn't say anything else after that, only continued on dragging me. Until she went to where the guards were and I could hear screaming again. The man was now inside a dungeon along with the guards and their now, blooded weapons. They all stopped and turned to look at me, concerned.
Before, the man had only lost a foot, now he has lost another leg and an arm. His blood had splattered everywhere, the cell was a mess and the disgusting smell of iron started to envelop my noise.
I know exactly what well happen here. I had rushed yet another scene but at least it's for a cause. Nicaise went through this same situation when she discovered the old duchess secret. She found her mother with visitors late at night and followed them, she discovered the passages the same way I did, only she was 15 at the time. The only difference is that when she saw what happened, she screamed and ran away. The guards went after her and she was quickly captured then bought back to the hall where she was then forced to oath that she would accept the ways of her household and to never tell a soul.
But I didn't scream nor ran so it will be a different outcome.
"Nicaise, you are now my daughter and the next in line for my succession. As part of your future responsibilities to this household, I ask you. What do you think of this man? ", the frightening tone of her voice gave me cold sweat. I did my best to try and calm myself, forcibly telling myself in the head that this is all a part of the story and I mustn't be scared.
I looked down at the man and met his eyes. He was as confused as I am but I knew better than to answer with that. I looked back at mother who was already staring at me.
"His face… is distorted with greed", I answered.
I know Nicaise at this time answered differently, she reasoned many things and the duchess didn't like them. I answered fairly short as to not encore her anger even more but to my surprise, she suddenly laughed.
"Do you think I should spare him??", she asked me with a genuine smile that I found creepy. I swallowed my saliva and knew then.
"If you are punishing him, then it must mean that he is bad person", the man's eyes shoot wide with my answer and pleaded to me with a desperate look but I averted my gaze.The duchess laughed once more and then she took out her sword.
"Clever girl! You're this young yet you've thought of that?", she marveled and went behind the man.
"Then, would you still find it justifiable if I did this?",for the next second, she lifted her sword in the air before I could even blink and stabbed the man in the head. He was able to scream once until his eyes rolled back in his sockets. The duchess had a very wide grin on her face at this point as she glanced at me then back to the man and began twisting her sword in his skull. She was doing so, violently and even seemed to enjoy it. She wasn't known to kill children but I was nervous then because I know what is to come next. The dreaded punishment of Nicaise that made her stop eating meat for the rest of her life.
"You have committed a grave a sin, Nicaise and so, I must punish you", she lodged the sword deeper into his head until one of the man's eye popped out, followed by his now severed tongue. His face could no longer be identified, it was bathed in blood and the wretched sound of the sword moving in his head, disgusted me.
"For being my daughter, this is the kind of life you will be living. The secrets of this household you must bare yourself for the rest of your life. You must oath to me", she coldly announced. The guards stayed on their post and watched, the man still in his lifeless body.
She got her sword out from his head and kicked him aside, then she squatted in front of me. "What will it be, Nicaise? Prove it to me that you are capable of being my daughter", she stared at me coldly, her eyes widened and near me. Her blank gaze stared into the depths of my mind desperately awaiting my answer but they were empty.
"H-how?", poor Nicaise asked, frivolously shaking from fear.
"How?", I asked.
"Consume what you saw, that way you will forever be guilty from within for this crime of luring yourself to this sin", her old mother reasoned and caressed her paled lips.
"Consume what you saw, that way you will forever be guilty from within for this crime of luring yourself to this sin", mother reasoned and caressed my lips the very same way she did in my memory.
Then she stood up and waited.
Nicaise made a mistake, a childish, foolish mistake that scarred her for life. The duchess is kind but could turn the cruelest. She had made her child eat from the man she murdered. Nicaise panicked and obeyed in fear that she would be thrown out into the streets again. She couldn't care what she had picked she devoured it immediately.
I stared at the sight in front of me. The body of the lifeless man laid in his own pool of blood. I could see his severed leg above him and his severed arm under him. The blood splatter almost reaching the ends of my skirt and near my foot was his tongue and eyeball. I knelt down.
Nicaise unknowingly chose the tongue which was much harder to chew and swallow, it was more disgusting to taste and she vomited instantly. After that, the duchess locked her up in the cell for a week before reconciliation.
I don't want to hurt my stomach as much and I want to be able to continue eating meat. I don't know why my hand was shaking as I reached out but I chose to pick up the eye. I didn't look at it for too long or else, I'd vomit. I quickly devoured it. It popped in my mouth and the strange taste along with but I swallowed it and didn't dare try to make a face out of it. After I made sure I was calm enough, I looked up at my mother.
We stared at each other for a long time before her expression changed she and looked away. She massaged her nose bridge and sighed before turning her back on me and putting her sword away.
"Wait outside for me",she said. "Take her away from here", she ordered, the guards nodded then one of them picked me up and carried me out of the dungeon.
I felt like fainting because of of nausea, I didn't even noticed that we had arrived back upstairs until he put me down on the floor of the office and went back in. Once I was sure, he was gone, I ran to my room and threw up. I couldn't keep it in after all. It wasn't the sight that disturbed me, it was the taste.
My stomach was still squeamish but nonetheless, I did as I was told. I waited for the duchess outside of her office, in the hallway. I sat on the floor and rested my head on my knees, hugging them. I never expected the entrance to the passages being this close to my room. If I had waited for another 10 years for this moment, it wouldn't have been useful for me. With this right, I can work things out more clearly because I now have access to it. Although, it wasn't quite up to the sacrifice I had to make.
I contemplated on the events as I waited. Just like before when I rush an event something similar to a scene, it will unfold as it did in the story but I could change it, depending on my choices. Nicaise never recovered her relationship with the duchess after this, they only maintained formalities.
I waited for what felt like hours. She's been down there a while and when she finally came out, the guards were no longer with her. I guess they took another route to leave. When she exited her office, she stopped when she spotted me. I guess she was about to go to my room but I did as I was told and waited outside. She stopped on her track and leaned on the wall beside me. The awkward silence grew as she didn't spoke until the sound of silence was deafening.
"Here", she offered and when I lifted my head, she gave me a bag of candy. A familiar one, just like the ones we bought at the liquor store. I took it and ate it.
"You like sour candies don't you? It helps with nausea", she said before looking away and lighting a cigarette. Ironically how this candy came to be of use.
As I ate in silence, it was true. It did help rid of the bad taste in my mouth and silenced my stomach.
She puffed out a smoke and squatted to sit beside me.
"That man had slavery rings all across the kingdom, it took some time for us to get him because he was hiding behind a powerful aristocrat's shadow. Not only did he made trades with enemies he was also known for using children. I couldn't just let a man like that live." She reasoned. She then sighed heavily and rubbed my head.
"Sorry you had to see that, little one", she smiled sadly and got up.
"Get some rest now", she said and escorted me to my room. Before closing the door, she had something she wanted to say but didn't.
I stared at the candies on my side table. She knows I'm not fond of sweets.
Either this outcome or to be forced to live with a rotting corpse for a week like the real Nicaise. I find this better. I'm not the only one who is plagued with guilt now, she is more remorseful than I am.