The captain was getting beaten.
The three recruits stared blankly.
"…Should we help him?" Annie asked flatly.
Bertolt shook his head with grim determination. "Commander said the key to infiltration is 'keeping a low profile.'"
Reiner crossed his arms, fuming. "Low profile my ass. Let him suffer. Who told him to ditch us and go play with kids?"
…
Meanwhile, Zeke had already recovered from the blow. Two tiny children against the Marleyan Warrior Captain? Ridiculous.
"Okay, okay!" he said quickly before Eren could swing again. "Listen, Eren—I'm your brother. No… cousin! A distant cousin! I came here to find your father, Grisha!"
"Cousin?" Eren froze mid-swing.
Mikasa's fist also paused, though her glare didn't soften. Her scarf shifted as she muttered,
"Blonde hair, golden eyes… that's a Westerner's face. How could you be related to Uncle Grisha and Aunt Carla?"
"I take after my mom, alright?! Idiot!" Zeke almost coughed blood. Do I really look that unrelated to the Jaeger line?
Eren frowned, lowering the stick slightly. "…But if you're family, why has Dad never mentioned you?"
"They said it's 'distant relatives!'" Zeke explained desperately.
"You know, the kind of relatives who live so far away you might never meet in your whole life."
"…But the walls aren't that big," Eren said suspiciously.
"That's right," Mikasa added calmly. "Even if you live in the farthest mountain village, you can reach it by horse or boat in a day."
"…" Zeke almost choked. This damned island really is too small.
"Uh… where I live, there are no horses. Or boats." He scratched his head, improvising wildly.
"So, not easy to travel. Understand?"
Both kids blinked. Neither looked convinced.
"Anyway," Zeke said at last, forcing a smile, "just take me home.
When your father sees me, everything will be clear."
His hand brushed his jaw unconsciously. And this time, when Father sees me… I'm younger. Fresher. No beard. He won't call me a weird uncle again. He won't…
But Eren only recoiled, snatching up the stick again. "Like hell I'd bring you home, you creepy uncle!"
"Call me brother! Brother!" Zeke snapped, temper fraying.
"You stupid little brother! You're supposed to be cuter than this! I thought your adult self was bad enough, but as a kid you're even worse!"
"What the hell are you saying?!" Eren shouted back. "You're just spouting crazy nonsense!"
"I'm telling you—your dad will prove it!"
"My dad isn't home!"
Zeke froze.
His stomach dropped.
"…What?"
Eren blinked. "He went into the city to treat some noble. Why should I tell you that, you weirdo—"
But Zeke grabbed his shoulders, panic flashing across his face. "How long ago?!"
"This morning…"
"When will he be back?!"
Eren pouted, thinking. "Depends. If the patient's really sick, maybe ten days, half a month. If not… two or three days?"
Mikasa's eyes narrowed.
"Eren. Didn't you say never tell strangers about your family?"
Eren winced, cheeks red. "…I—I don't know why, but even though he's weird… I feel… familiar."
…
The words pierced Zeke's chest like sunlight breaking cloud.
Familiar. He feels it. He still feels it.
His eyes stung. "Eren… You recognize me, don't you? You're more honest now than in the future. That's the truth, right? Eren~!"
He lunged forward, arms wide, lips puckering for another kiss.
"Stay away from me!" Eren screamed. "You perverted uncle!"
"Nooo, let your brother love you~!" Zeke sobbed, clutching him again.
But then—
"Search the area! They can't have gone far!"
The shouts of the Survey Corps rang down the street.
Zeke froze. In an instant, his soldier's instincts returned.
Damn it. They're already on our trail.
He scooped both children up—stick, firewood and all—ignoring their protests. "Retreat!" he barked to the hidden recruits.
Reiner, Annie, and Bertolt darted after him without hesitation. They didn't dare risk being cornered by the Survey Corps now.
"Let me go, you freak! Even if you kidnap me, I won't tell you where my house is!" Eren kicked furiously in his arms.
"I don't need you to," Zeke said smugly. "Uncle Grisha already gave me the address in a letter."
"Eh?!"
And just like that, with two squirming children, an armful of firewood, and three very confused young warriors at his heels—Zeke Jaeger marched triumphantly toward the Jaeger household.