Time seemed to stretch on, and for once, Mejiro Ardan fell into a rare silence. Instead of answering Dream Weaver's question, she fixed her gaze on the Uma Musume training on the field, unwilling to look away.
After a long while, Mejiro Ardan finally spoke, her voice subdued.
"Perhaps you're right."
"After I left the racing scene, the newcomers at Central Tracen have grown more and more impressive. It's hard not to feel a little sentimental."
Dream Weaver furrowed her brow at that. She could hear the tinge of loneliness in Ardan's words, but couldn't quite place its source.
Though they had spent several months together, Dream Weaver had poured almost all her energy into training, never really engaging in deep conversation with the other girl.
While she had always basked in the warmth and patience Ardan offered, Dream Weaver had never considered what she might give in return—nor had she ever learned about Mejiro Ardan's past.
She had stayed with the Mejiro family hoping to see Ardan's joy when she won the Tenno Sho Spring, yet she had no idea why Ardan wanted so badly to see her claim that title.
And then she remembered—how Ardan had forced a smile to congratulate her on winning the Tenno Sho Spring, even with tears streaking her face. That heavy emotion left a weight in Dream Weaver's chest, but it also sparked a realization. So she asked:
"What were you like back then, Ardan? When you were still racing?"
The question swept Mejiro Ardan back in time like a time machine. Staring out at the training field now, she seemed to see her own past self striving there, and her answer came out distant, almost dreamlike.
"What was I like…? If I had to say… I was always just a little short."
"I wanted so badly to prove myself… A G1 victory felt so close, yet I could never quite grasp it."
What Mejiro Ardan had never told Dream Weaver was that she had been born with a frail constitution. When she first debuted, some had scornfully called her "glass legs" to mock her fragile body.
Growing up in the Mejiro family, they had sheltered and protected her—treated her, true to that label, like a piece of glass, handled with extreme care.
But Mejiro Ardan didn't want that kind of pity, handed to her like it was only natural. She wanted to prove that even someone made of glass could shine as brilliantly as a diamond.
In the end, though, she failed. No matter how hard she pushed, a G1 victory remained out of reach. In the end, her body gave out, forcing her to retire, her dream left unfinished.
People told her she had shone brightly enough on the track, but Mejiro Ardan knew those words were still measured against glass. She never wanted to be just glass.
No matter how it glitters, glass will always be fragile.
That's why she had deliberately avoided bringing this up around Dream Weaver. She didn't want to see that same pity in the other's eyes.
The fact that Dream Weaver saw her as a normal Uma Musume, that she let Ardan do things the rest of the Mejiro family would never allow—that alone made Ardan happy.
In a way, Mejiro Ardan was deeply insecure. That's why she was too ashamed to share her past with Dream Weaver.
Even now, she was still hiding the truth of her fragility, answering Dream Weaver's curiosity with vague, evasive words.
Dream Weaver couldn't read minds, of course. She had no way of knowing what Ardan was thinking, but she could still sense the thick air of regret and sorrow hanging on her words.
"So you really do still want to run, don't you, Ardan?"
Mejiro Ardan froze, not given a moment to reply before Dream Weaver pressed on.
"It's because you never achieved the victory you wanted that you can't let go of the track."
"Wanting to see me win the Tenno Sho Spring, watching the younger girls chase their dreams now—it's all the same, isn't it? You… you're envious of us, aren't you?"
"Envious that we… can still set foot on the track."
Mejiro Ardan listened quietly until Dream Weaver finished, then slowly closed her eyes and murmured,
"Maybe that's it…"
"Maybe because of my own regrets, I ended up projecting my own shadow onto you, Dreams."
She let out a soft, self-mocking laugh.
"What a shameless older sister I am. Claiming I only wanted to cheer you on, when all along I was piling my own hopes onto your shoulders."
"The Tenno Sho Spring, the upcoming Tenno Sho Autumn… in the end, they're just the desperate wishes of someone who couldn't succeed, trying to live out her victory through someone else."
Looking at Dream Weaver, who shared her blood, was like looking at another version of herself—one whose body wasn't frail or made of glass, but real, unbreakable diamond, destined to shine brilliantly under the spotlight for all to see.
At first, her kindness toward Dream Weaver had come from a place of genuine warmth and their shared bond. But once she realized Dream Weaver's talent, she'd unconsciously begun seeing the other as a perfected version of herself.
Every time she watched Dream Weaver running across the training field, Ardan couldn't help but replace that figure with her own, reliving the days when she, too, could still run on the track.
"Maybe… I've been using you, Dreams, as a substitute for my own dream."
Mejiro Ardan slowly crouched down, bowing her head so her pale blue hair fell over her eyes, hiding her expression. Now that the words were out, she didn't know how to face Dream Weaver anymore.
She felt she didn't deserve to be called an older sister—didn't even deserve to look Dream Weaver in the eye. So instinctively, she curled into herself, retreating from the other girl's gaze.
After all, she was just that kind of shameful Uma Musume—using someone else as a stand-in for her own dreams. How was she any different from the adults who only saw Dream Weaver as a tool to claim back-to-back Tenno Sho victories?
Mejiro Ardan didn't know exactly what the family elders had done, but she wasn't stupid. She'd pieced things together from Dream Weaver's interviews and their conversations.
She'd never brought it up because she didn't want Dream Weaver to see her as one of those adults. But now, with her own hidden motives laid bare, Ardan felt she had become just as despicable as the people they both despised.
"Maybe the Mejiro family really is full of shameful, dishonorable Uma Musume after all."
"So it's only natural… if you end up hating me too…"
Mejiro Ardan buried her face in her arms, her voice muffled and small.
--+--
T/N: While I am an inexperienced Translator, I have a Patreon! Webnovel will get 3 Chapters Every Day, and advanced chapters will be uploaded on Patreon.
It may not seem worth it now, but maybe in the future. Who knows!
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If you guys wanna check it out.