Chapter 3: The Night She Shouldn't Have Had
Elara POV
I should push him away.
The thought flickered through my mind as Darius's lips moved against mine, desperate and hungry. I should step back, run to Cassian's chambers, and pretend this never happened.
Instead, I melted into him.
His hands framed my face, thumbs brushing away tears I didn't realize I was crying. The kiss deepened, and I felt something inside me break open. Not break apart—break free.
This was what the stories meant. What the elders whispered about when they spoke of true mates. This fire in my veins, this need that made everything else seem pale and distant.
"Elara." My name was a growl against my lips. "Tell me to stop."
I couldn't. The words wouldn't come. My wolf was singing, finally whole for the first time in my life.
"I can't," I whispered instead.
Something wild flashed in his eyes. "Thank the goddess."
He kissed me again, harder this time. His hands slid down to my waist, pulling me against him until I could feel the heat of his body through my wedding dress. The same dress I'd worn to marry his brother hours ago.
The thought should have stopped me. Should have filled me with shame.
It didn't.
Nothing mattered except this moment, this man, this bond that made my very soul burn.
"Not here," Darius said against my throat, his lips finding the pulse point that made me gasp. "Anyone could see."
He was right. The shrine was open to the sky, visible from the palace windows. But I couldn't make myself care about anything beyond the way his mouth felt on my skin.
"I don't care," I breathed.
"I do." He pulled back just enough to meet my eyes. "You deserve better than a quick fumble where anyone might watch."
His concern for my dignity even now—when we were both trembling with need—made my heart clench. When had Cassian ever worried about my feelings?
Darius took my hand, leading me deeper into the garden. Past rose bushes and fountain pools, to a small grove hidden behind weeping willows. Moonlight filtered through the leaves, painting everything silver and shadow.
"Here," he said softly. "No one will find us here."
He turned to face me, and I saw my own desperate hunger reflected in his storm-gray eyes. But there was something else too. Tenderness. Reverence. Like I was something precious instead of a political bargaining chip.
"Are you sure?" he asked. "Once we do this, there's no going back."
I thought of Cassian waiting in his chambers. Of the vows I'd made just hours ago. Of the peace treaty that depended on my marriage.
Then I looked at Darius—really looked at him. At the way he watched me like I was the moon itself. At the careful distance he kept, even now, waiting for my choice.
"I've never been sure of anything in my life," I said. "But I'm sure of this."
He was on me in an instant, hands tangling in my hair as he kissed me like a man dying of thirst. I kissed him back just as desperately, my fingers fumbling with the buttons of his formal jacket.
We sank to our knees on the soft grass, mouths never parting. His hands found the laces of my wedding dress, and I should have felt guilty as the white silk pooled around my waist.
I felt free instead.
The mate bond sang between us, a harmony I'd never known existed. Every touch, every kiss, every whispered endearment felt like coming home. Like finding the missing piece of my soul.
When he laid me back on the grass, moonlight turned my skin to pearl and his to bronze. Beautiful and terrible and perfect.
"My mate," he whispered, pressing kisses along my collarbone. "My queen."
Not Cassian's queen. His.
The thought should have terrified me. Instead, it made me arch beneath him, desperate for more.
We moved together like we'd been made for this moment. Like the goddess herself had designed us to fit together perfectly. Fire raced through my veins, building to something bright and overwhelming.
When release finally claimed us, I cried out his name to the stars.
Afterwards, we lay tangled together on the grass, my head on his chest. His heartbeat was strong and steady beneath my cheek. His fingers combed through my hair, gentle as a blessing.
"What happens now?" I whispered.
His hand stilled. "I don't know."
The reality of what we'd done crashed over me like a cold wave. I'd betrayed my marriage vows. Betrayed the peace treaty. Betrayed everything my people were counting on.
"Tomorrow I belong to him," I said, the words tasting like ash.
Darius's arms tightened around me. "No. You belong to me. The goddess chose us."
"The goddess doesn't care about politics." Tears burned my eyes. "Or wars. Or the people who'll die if this marriage fails."
"Elara—"
"I have to go to him." I sat up, reaching for my scattered clothes. "I have to pretend tonight never happened."
"Like hell you do."
The fury in his voice made me look back. He'd sat up too, eyes blazing in the moonlight.
"He's my brother, but I'll kill him before I let him touch you."
"You can't." I pulled my dress over my head, fingers shaking as I tried to lace it back up. "If you challenge him, people will ask why. They'll figure it out. The peace will shatter."
"Let it shatter."
"Easy words from someone who won't watch children starve when the war starts again."
He flinched like I'd slapped him. Good. Maybe pain would make him see reason where pleasure couldn't.
I finished dressing and turned to leave, but his hand caught my wrist.
"This isn't over," he said quietly.
I looked down at him—rumpled and beautiful and heartbroken—and felt my resolve crack.
"It has to be."
I pulled free and ran back toward the palace, leaving him alone in the moonlight.
In Cassian's chambers, I slipped into bed beside my sleeping husband and stared at the ceiling until dawn. My body still hummed with Darius's touch. My wolf paced restlessly, whining for her mate.
When morning light crept through the windows, I pressed a hand to my stomach and froze.
There. So faint I almost missed it. A flutter of warmth, of new life beginning.
"Moon goddess," I whispered. "What have I done?"