The second baby was born when Kezia still couldn't walk, still crawling everywhere like a little crab, always chasing after attention. The house grew even louder. Baby cries overlapped, sometimes so similar it was hard to tell them apart.
Oma now had two toddlers to care for. She looked after Kezia, who was starting to get jealous, and Nathan, who was growing quieter by the day. Miss Kristin, meanwhile, was hardly ever seen outside her room, her face tired, her hair tied back carelessly, and in her arms always the new baby girl. She looked so much like Kezia, just a little smaller, a little calmer.
Nathan watched it all from the doorway, or the dining table, or the sofa. He wasn't sure whether to feel happy or pushed aside. Sometimes he'd inch closer to Miss Kristin, just to sneak a look at the baby from afar. But Kezia's sudden crying, crawling over to tug at her mother's skirt, always stole her focus away.
And so Nathan thought to himself, Maybe that's just what it means to be the oldest. You have to give in… all the time.
---
After taking maternity leave for the second baby, Miss Kristin went back to teaching. By now, Nathan was in kindergarten, level B, he could read and write small letters, memorize worship songs, and even brush his teeth on his own without help.
The two younger sisters, Kezia, who had just learned to walk, and the youngest, who was still nursing, were cared for by Oma and a helper they had hired after the second baby was born. The house was still noisy, but a little more organized. Even so, something felt off to Nathan.
Every morning, Miss Kristin rushed out the door for work, still looking exhausted, sometimes with dried spit-up stains clinging to her collar. Watching from the dining table, Nathan couldn't shake the feeling that something wasn't right.
"Why does Mama Kristin still have to work? There are two babies at home," he thought. He glanced at Papa, who sat typing on his laptop, sipping coffee, as if none of it bothered him.
"Is Papa's salary not enough for us? Or does he just let her work so she won't nag him at home?"
The thought made Nathan go quiet for a long time. He stared at the soggy cereal in his bowl and stirred it slowly. At just five years old, questions about money, parents, and the mysteries of adult life had already begun piling up in his little mind, even if he didn't know who to ask.
---
Morning prayer session at school went on as usual. The children sat in a circle, eyes closed, hands folded neatly in front of their chests. The teacher led with a gentle voice, "Alright, let's pray for good things, for our families, our friends, and for anyone you love."
When it was his turn, Nathan opened his eyes for a second, then closed them again and drew a slow breath.
With a loud, innocent voice, he said, "God, please… don't let Mama Kristin get pregnant again. I'm dizzy having too many siblings."
The classroom froze for a moment. Then giggles burst out from a few corners. Some kids covered their mouths, snickering. Even Miss Lidya, who was keeping watch from the teacher's desk, couldn't hide her amused smile.
Nathan slowly opened his eyes. Everyone was staring, some laughing outright, others trying to hold it back.
"What?" he asked innocently.
Nino, sitting beside him, patted his back while suppressing a laugh. "You're hilarious, Nat."
Nathan pouted. "Hilarious? This is serious!" he fumed silently.
But deep down, he knew, if God really listened to his prayer, then tomorrow there'd be no news of "Mama Kristin throwing up again."
---
Fast forward. The years passed.
Kezia was now in elementary school, while Priscilla was still in preschool. Ever since they were babies, the two sisters had slept in their parents' room. But that afternoon, Kristin sat in the living room, gently combing Kezia's long hair.
"Now that you're in grade school," she said softly, "Mama wants to set up the guest room for you, so you'll have your own bedroom."
Kezia's head shot up. "I don't want to!"
Kristin smiled patiently. "Why not?"
"Because then Priscilla will sleep with Mama and Papa, and I'll be kicked out," she said, her voice quivering on the edge of tears.
From the dining table, Nathan, now a fifth grader, busy with homework, couldn't resist chiming in. "Hey, I've been sleeping alone since I was a baby," he said, sipping his tea.
Kezia scowled. "That's you!"
Then her eyes lit up with an idea. She turned to Nathan, flashing a sweet smile. "Then I'll just share a room with you, Kaka!"
Fyi, 'Kaka' is a nickname for an elder sibling in NTT.
Nathan's eyes went wide. He dropped his pencil. "No! No way!" he barked instantly.
"Why not?" Kezia pouted.
"Because you're noisy! And you snore in your sleep!"
Kristin could only laugh while Nathan stormed off to his room, slamming the door faster than usual. From behind it came his muffled grumble, "Oh no… here comes the nightmare phase."
In the living room, Kezia hugged her mother, giggling. "Kaka is so stingy."
The first night sharing a room with Kezia.
At last, Nathan's trundle bed, usually just a dumping ground for toys and clean laundry, finally served its true purpose. The lower mattress was pulled out, covered with Kezia's favorite pink bedsheet, complete with the stuffed bunny she never let go of.
"You sleep on the bottom, okay? Don't climb up here," Nathan instructed before switching off the light.
"Yes, Kaka," Kezia replied sweetly. But Nathan knew, her sweetness was often just the prologue to trouble.
---
The next morning, Nathan woke up needing the bathroom. As soon as his eyes opened, he peeked over the edge of his bed. Empty.
"Huh? Kezia?" he mumbled.
He scrambled down, and there she was, lying on the floor, blanket half-slid off her small body, fast asleep as if nothing was wrong. Her hair was a mess, and her bunny was pinned under one of her legs.
Nathan scratched his head. "Good grief, you roll around like a soccer ball."
He bent down and tried to lift her gently back onto the mattress.
"Don't bother me…" Kezia muttered drowsily, still lost in dreamland.
Nathan sighed. "Looks like mornings are gonna be drama from now on…"
---