"And I said to my body softly, 'I want to be your friend.' It took a long breath and replied, 'I have been waiting my whole life for this.'" -- Nayirrah Waheed.
"YOU ARE GOING on a blind date." Mom announced over breakfast the next day.
The coffee that was going down my throat went through the wrong pipe and I started to cough.
Mom passed me a glass of water and I took a sip in a bid to ease my cough. She stood up from her chair and came to pat my back softly to ease it.
When it seemed I had recovered, she returned to her seat.
"Sorry, what?" Was all I managed to say.
Mom continued eating like she didn't just detonate a bomb. "You heard me."
No, I didn't think I did. Maybe my brain was still fuzzy since I woke up about an hour ago.
"You're going on a blind date?" I asked her. I hoped that was what she had said and not what my brain thought she said.
She dropped her fork and stared at me. "No. You. You are the one going on a blind date. Not me."
"Me?" My right hand rested on my chest as I stared at her with a slack jaw.
She nodded.
"You're messing with me, right? That can't be true. It isn't Aprils' fool day, is it?" I looked around hysterically trying to find a calendar even though I was well aware of the fact that it was mid-October.
"I'm not messing with you. I set you up for a blind date and it's happening this weekend."
"Why, mom? I never asked for one, did I?" Disbelief was written all over my face. I felt betrayed. How could she do this to me? Girls like me don't go on blind dates.
"You didn't have to."
I sighed. "How did this even happen? Is it someone I know?"
"I don't think so. It's one of my colleague's sons. She was going on about how her son has been single all his life and how she's afraid that he's missing out on a lot. I mentioned that you were just like that and she suggested that we set you two up for a date. I thought it was a great idea."
"No, mom. It's not."
"Well, everything's been set. I already gave out your number so be expecting to hear from him soon."
I released a breadth, feeling defeated. "Can I at least know his name?"
Mom had a thoughtful look on her face. "You know, I don't know it either. I never asked."
"Mom!"
"I know it might be scary but it's a good idea. You get to step out of your comfort zone and try new things."
"But--" I stopped myself from uttering the rest of the words of that sentence.
"But what?"
Girls like me don't go on blind dates. That was what I wanted to say but I settled for, "Nothing."
I knew saying that was not a good idea. It would just lead to my mom babbling about body positivity. And the speech would probably last till I get off at school. I knew she was coming from a good place and she wanted what was best for me but I couldn't help feeling annoyed most times.
"It is settled then. Eat up, darling. You have 15 minutes left."
"Mom?"
"Yes, darling."
"Please, don't do something like this without asking me first."
She dropped her fork. "I'm sorry. I won't do it again."
I didn't take any more bites. I had already lost my appetite. The ride to school this morning was quiet, and all I kept hoping was that my mysterious unwanted blind date would be as uninterested as I was, and therefore, would not text me. When I got to my locker and opened it, something fell out. I bent down with curiosity to pick it out. It was a small white envelope. I turned it over to see a tiny red heart at the bottom right. It looked like a letter.
Someone must have mistakenly slipped it into my locker. Because there was no way in hell that it could actually be for me.
I can just read it and maybe I'll find the name of the sender or the recipient and return it to them, I thought.
I opened the envelope and pulled out the neatly folded paper in it. I unraveled it to read it only to see my name at the top. My heart started to pound.
Maisie,
You're not just beautiful. You're stunning. Inside and out.
Your curves are a work of art.
Was I dreaming or something?
I slapped my cheek and I groaned at the sting.
This was definitely real. Then was I in an alternate universe or something: one where big girls are the most wanted and they get love letters and where pigs fly? I looked around but didn't see any flying pigs. Everything looked exactly the same.
Then, this must be a prank.
Exciting things like this don't happen to girls like me. Girls like me don't get love letters from secret admirers. Someone was definitely messing with me.
I read the letter again and felt pissed off. Why would someone play this kind of sick joke on me? Why?
"Hey, you." I heard Avery say behind me.
I quickly hid the envelope, acting like someone that had just been caught doing something bad. I turned around to face her.
"Avery!" I exclaimed. "Hi."
She looked out at me suspiciously, noticing my hand hiding something behind my back. She narrowed her eyes on me. "What are you hiding?"
I folded the envelope and put it in the back pocket of my jeans. "Nothing!"
"I do not believe you." She pulled out my hands to find them empty.
"See, I told you. Nothing."
"Okay."
"Uh huh." I nodded, beginning to feel slightly awkward. I recalled seeing her together with the Bs in the cafeteria and I didn't know how to feel about that. I so badly wanted to ask her but I didn't think it was a good idea. What if I've been wrong this entire time and she was just like them? I absentmindedly faced my locker to pick up my books for my morning classes, overthinking everything.
"Is everything okay?" Avery asked.
"Yeah, everything's fine. Why would anything be wrong?" I faced her with the best fake smile I could muster. "Let me just get my things."
"How was the meeting with my brother?"
"Great! We're done with the assignment. He's turning it in today."
"So, no more dates with him?"
I shut my locker and faced her with a deadpan look on my face. "They were not dates and you know it."
She playfully hit my arm, smiling. "I was just teasing."
I knew I should smile but I couldn't. I started heading towards my first class and she followed behind.
"Guess what?" I was not in the mood for guessing. "Brittany invited me to a party."
My ears perked up and I slowed my pace. "When?"
"Yesterday, during lunch. She and her lackeys came to sit with me and they invited me."
"They invited your brother too."
"They did? He didn't mention it. Well, neither did I."
"So, are you going?"
"To the party? No, I have other plans."
I was curious about the other plans she had but I didn't want to ask."Okay."
"With you."
My eyebrows furrowed. "Me?"
"Yes. We're having a sleepover."
"We are?"
"Yes, if you are up for it."
No, I shouldn't agree to this. I was trying to stay away from her brother and having a sleepover at their house was not exactly the definition of 'staying away.'
But I've never had a sleepover before. Will I really miss this because of Alex? The sleepover is with her and not with him. We could have it and I wouldn't even see him, right?
This is a bad plan, Maisie. Don't do it! My subconscious told me but I ignored it.
"Okay. Let's do it."
"Yes!" She jumped excitedly. "We are going to have so much fun."
I wanted to match her excitement but I couldn't find any fiber in me to do so. "I guess."
"Maisie!" Someone yelled behind us and we turned to see Ray running over.
What does he want now?
I was yet to understand why he spoke to me the other day and now, he's about to do it again. At least he remembered my name this time around.
"Off to class?" he asked as soon as he reached us.
A few beats passed as I wondered why he was talking like we were friends, before I answered him, hesitantly. "Yes."
His gaze moved to Avery standing beside me. "Hi, Avery."
She stared at him with furrowed eyebrows. "Hi?" She didn't say anything else but she had this intimidating look on her face that seemed to ask: Do I know you?
"Um…" Ray started, letting out a nervous chuckle. "We have a few classes together."
Avery said nothing to that. It was as if she was waiting for more explanation, but Ray had nothing more to give.
His eyes met mine and he blinked twice with a pleading look on his face. I understood what he was trying to tell me. He wanted me to introduce him to her.
I mentally sighed. "Avery, this is Ray. He's the captain of the football team. Ray, Avery."
Ray didn't waste time in offering her a handshake. "Nice to meet you, Avery."
She reluctantly took it. "Hi."
"I'm having a party tomorrow night. You should come."
"I already have plans."
Ray couldn't hide the disappointment on his face. "Oh, okay. Can I have your number?" He pulled out his phone from his pocket and offered it to her.
She looked at me with questioning eyes and I shrugged. Then she reluctantly collected his phone and typed in her number. She handed it back to him. "Here."
He had a broad grin on his face as he collected it. "Thank you. I'll text you."
"We'll be late for class, Maisie. Let's go." Avery pulled me along as she led the way to class. When we had walked a notable distance from him, she spoke. "You never told me about him."
"That's because we are not friends."
She paused. "What?"
"We are not friends. That was only the second time he has ever spoken to me."
"I thought he was your friend. That was why I reluctantly gave him my number."
"Well, he's not."
"Let's go back. I need to delete my number." She tried to head back to him but I stopped her.
"Are you being serious?" I asked in disbelief.
"Yes, of course."
"What would you even say?"
"Something?"
I laughed, pulling her in the direction of our first class. "Let's just go."
Avery joined me in laughter.
Then I was reminded of the white envelope in my back pocket and my laughter faltered.
Who could be playing this sick joke on me?