[A/N: I was laughing my ass off writing this chapter I hope you all enjoy this chapter as well as me and today I would be a normal author give me your power stone]
Chapter 60 – "The Cutest and Handsomest Bounty in the East Blue"
Sunny's POV
Morning sunlight spilled across the deck of the Going Merry. The air smelled like salt, breakfast, and chaos — which, at this point, was our crew's natural scent.
Lucy was standing on the railing, grinning ear to ear, holding a rolled-up newspaper like a sacred treasure. "Oi, everyone! We made it into the news!!"
Zoro blinked from where he was napping. "Again?"
Sanji was already twirling, cigarette hanging from his lips. "If it's about me being the most handsome cook on the seas, I won't be surprised." "Keep dreaming," Nami muttered, counting her latest haul of berries beside Nojiko.
Aqua, polishing her trident beside me, perked up. "News Coos came by earlier! It dropped something big!"
The seagull-like bird squawked overhead, flapping away after its duty — leaving behind the rolled-up World Economy Newspaper sealed with a red wax mark: Bounty Update Edition.
Lucy tore it open dramatically, almost like she was hosting a festival. "Ladies and gentlemen, prepare yourselves… for fame!" she yelled, posing like she just declared war on the world government.
I sighed. "I don't like the sound of that…"
Lucy's grin grew wider. "Too late, Sunny. You're famous."
---
The Headline
"NEW PIRATE CREW TAKES EAST BLUE BY STORM — THE STRAW HAT PIRATES!"
Below that was… Two wanted posters.
My heart dropped as Lucy slapped mine against the mast. "Look at it, everyone!! Sunny's first bounty!"
Wanted: Sunny [Surname Hidden] – 100,000,000 Berries. The most handsome and dangerously adorable man on the sea.
Silence. Then…
Sanji choked. "WHAT!? Handsome!? DANGEROUSLY ADORABLE!? What kind of bounty description is that!?" Zoro nearly fell over laughing. "Guess your face is a national threat now!" Aqua burst out laughing so hard she rolled on the deck. "Oh gods— they called you adorable!" Even Nojiko couldn't hold back a snicker. "It's kind of accurate though."
"EH!?" I yelled. "No, it's not! I left that behind when I was fifteen! I'm not cute anymore, I'm scary! Menacing! Look at this—" I flexed dramatically, but Lucy just clasped her hands under her chin and smiled in dreamy admiration. "See? Even the newspaper agrees with me~ He's too cute for this world."
My face went red instantly. "Lucy, please stop saying that in front of everyone!"
Lucy only smiled wider, whispering, "No one else gets to call you cute. Not even the World Government." A faint yandere glint shimmered in her eyes for half a second — enough to make me freeze. Sanji shuddered. "Remind me never to make eye contact with her again…"
---
Lucy's Poster
Lucy spun dramatically and held up her own poster next. Wanted: "Straw Hat" Lucy – 30,000,000 Berries. Captain of the Most Handsome Man on the Sea.
Everyone went silent again.
Usopp blinked. "Wait… your bounty's literally because you're his captain?" Nami raised an eyebrow. "That's… both flattering and terrifying." Nojiko started giggling. "So the government basically said she's dangerous for being his girlfriend." Aqua cackled. "That's peak jealousy right there!"
Lucy beamed proudly. "That's right! My bounty's higher than Zoro's first one! I'm not just his captain, I'm the protector of the sea's cutest man!"
I buried my face in my hands. "I'm never showing my face in public again."
---
Elsewhere — Bell-mère's House
The scene shifted to Cocoyashi Village. Bell-mère was sitting on her porch, sipping tea when the newspaper hit her doorstep. "Hmm? What's this nonsense about a hundred million—"
She froze mid-sentence.
Her eyes widened as she saw Sunny's bounty plastered across the page. Then her cigarette fell from her lips as she burst into laughter. "Handsome!? Oh, that boy! He's gonna die from embarrassment before the Marines even find him!"
Lucy got thirty million just for being his captain!? Oh, this I've gotta frame!"
---
Back on the Merry
The deck was still chaos.
Zoro was crying from laughter. "You're doomed, Sunny. Every pirate and Marine girl's gonna chase you now." "Not if I burn every poster," I grumbled.
Lucy just smiled too sweetly. "Anyone who tries will be sunk. Personally."
Even the News Coos, circling above, looked like they were gossiping.
Aqua leaned toward me with that mischievous smile. "You know, Sunny… maybe you should use your bounty picture as our flag. The crew of the Cute King." "NO!" I yelled, but everyone was already laughing.
Lucy, of course, was the loudest. "Sunny the Cute King of the Seas~!"
"Lucy, stop spreading that name!!"
But she just winked. "Too late, Captain's orders!"
The World Economy Newspaper had never sold so fast in history.
All across East Blue, the News Coos screeched through the sky, scattering papers like divine confetti. Every few seconds, someone's breakfast was ruined by a headline so absurd that it broke the laws of reason itself:
> "WANTED — SUNNY: 100,000,000 BELI. 'The Most Handsome and Cutest Man on the Sea!'" "WANTED — LUCY: 30,000,000 BELI.
Captain of the Handsome and the cutest man.
---
Marine HQ — Chaos and Coffee
Inside Marine Headquarters, a young ensign tripped over a stack of papers and shouted, "S-sir! You need to see this— It's him again!"
Vice Admiral Garp was snoring in his chair, half a doughnut stuck to his cheek. "Huh? What's it this time? That brat blowing up a fort again?"
The ensign gulped. "No, sir. He… he's been declared the cutest man alive."
Garp blinked twice. "...The what now?"
Fleet Admiral Sengoku stormed in, newspaper in hand, veins bulging. "WHO SIGNED THIS DESCRIPTION!?"
Behind him, the report desk was an active warzone — marines crying, laughing, and trying to erase the phrase 'cute face that conquers hearts' from official wanted posters.
"Sir!" one shouted, holding up a draft. "We even received fan letters addressed to the criminal! From marine wives!"
Sengoku's glasses cracked. "Burn them. Burn everything!"
From the corner, Garp howled with laughter. "BAHAHAHAHA! That's my kind of pirate! A heartbreaker instead of a fort breaker!"
Meanwhile, the ensign whispered, "Uh… and the girl— Lucy— got her own bounty too, sir. Says here she's 'Captain of the Cutest Crew on the Sea.'"
Sengoku slammed his desk. "THEY'RE MOCKING THE ENTIRE NAVY!"
---
---
Syrup Village — Kaya's Home
Kaya sat in her garden, sipping tea when the paper arrived via News Coo. She unfolded it calmly— then dropped her cup.
Her golden eyes widened. "S-Sunny-san… one hundred million!?"
But her focus shifted as she read the second page— a familiar face with a long nose and a ridiculous grin under the words:
> Crewmate of the Cutest Pirate — Usopp of the Sea.
Her cheeks turned red instantly. "U-Usopp… he's part of this…?"
Merry, the butler, peeked over her shoulder and smiled. "My, my. Seems our brave liar's finally become a real pirate."
Kaya smiled softly, holding the paper to her chest. "Then I'll believe in him too."
She paused, frowning at Sunny's photo. "Still… one hundred million for being cute? The Marines are losing their minds."
---
Going Merry — Chaos at Sea
"WOOOHOOO! WE GOT OUR FIRST BOUNTIES!" Lucy yelled, waving the papers around.
Sunny looked pale. "Why— why does it say cute?! Why not strong? Or scary? Or— I dunno— mysterious?!"
Aqua leaned on his shoulder with a grin. "Because, darling, even the Navy can't resist your face~♡"
Sunny groaned. "This is a nightmare."
{ego}: "Correction. This is divine comedy." [system]: "I might frame this on my wall. You look so adorable, Sunny~♡"
Sunny facepalmed. "Can I unsubscribe from both of you?"
Lucy laughed so hard she almost fell overboard. "Bwahahaha! Look at me! Thirty million! I'm the captain of the cutest man alive! Eat that, world!"
Nami smirked. "Captain of cute, huh? That's one title I didn't see coming."
Zoro muttered, "Can't believe we're sailing under the Pretty Boy Flag…" Sanji, meanwhile, was curled up dramatically in the corner. "A hundred million… for being cute! Life is unfair!"
Usopp puffed up proudly. "Well, technically I'm the marksman of the cutest crew in the world! That's prestige!"
Nojiko giggled. "You mean chaos."
---
Marine Broadcast — Official Statement
Hours later, across the seas, a shaky news broadcast aired from Marine Base 16.
A terrified marine reporter stood before the camera, stammering, "T-today, two new dangerous pirates have emerged. Sunny, the 'Cutest Man on the Sea,' and his captain Lucy—"
Behind him, another marine whispered, "Don't say cute! The Admiral said not to!"
He froze. "R-right! I mean— terrifying! Absolutely terrifyingly cute— I mean— AAHH!"
Static.
Sengoku's scream echoed through the transponder snails: "I SAID DELETE THE WORD CUTE!"
---
Meanwhile, on the Merry
Sunny slumped over the railing. "A hundred million beli. For my face. This world is doomed."
Lucy grinned, leaning beside him. "Hey, it's not so bad. Now you've got proof that even the World Government can't resist you."
He groaned. "That's not helping."
Nami smirked. "Look on the bright side— we're rich in fame now."
Usopp puffed out his chest. "And feared! People will tremble when they see our flag!"
Zoro: "Yeah, tremble from laughter maybe."
Everyone burst out laughing again.
[system]: "You know, my darling captain, this might be my favorite chapter of your legend yet~♡" {ego}: "Same. Can't wait for the fanclubs to start. Maybe we'll get merch."
Sunny slammed his head on the railing. "Please. No merch."
Lucy: "Too late! I already sent Usopp to design plushies!"
Sunny: "...WHAT?!"
Cue everyone's laughter echoing across the endless sea— while the world's most adorable chaos crew sailed toward their next adventure.