The morning sun cut through the thin curtains of my sister's apartment, soft and gold, too gentle for how restless I felt. My head still hummed from last night, the sound of Cory's voice under that streetlight replaying in my mind. I had told myself it meant nothing, but every time I blinked, I saw his eyes again, calm, calculating, almost daring me to feel something I shouldn't.
I dressed slowly, moving like I was trying not to wake the guilt sleeping beside me. Elena was already awake, humming faintly in the kitchen. The smell of coffee filled the air, bitter and warm, too ordinary for the storm inside me.
"Morning," I said, stepping in.
She smiled, her hair tied up in a loose bun. "You slept in. I was about to wake you."
"Yeah, I didn't rest much." I forced a laugh. "Too many thoughts."
"First night back in California will do that," she said, turning off the stove. "You want to grab breakfast outside? There's a café down the street that I like."
I nodded, pretending that sounded perfect. I needed to breathe different air, something that didn't smell like regret.
---
The café was small and bright, sunlight bouncing off glass and metal. The sound of plates clinking, coffee machines hissing, soft jazz in the background. Conversations mixed into a low hum — people talking about work, weather, life.
We sat by the window. Elena looked calm, too calm. She always had that quiet way of seeing more than she said.
"So," she said, stirring her cappuccino. "You said you'll be heading back soon?"
I hesitated. "Yeah. School stuff, you know. Can't miss too much."
She nodded, smiling, but her eyes didn't match it. "That's good. You always take your studies seriously."
The silence that followed wasn't loud, but it pressed on my chest. I looked out the window. Across the street, a man walked his dog. Two girls laughed near a bus stop. Everything looked normal, like my world wasn't quietly breaking apart.
Elena took a sip, still watching me. "You've been quiet since you arrived. Something happen?"
My stomach tightened. "No, not really. I'm just… tired. The trip was long."
She smiled again, softer this time. "You always say that when you don't want to talk."
I laughed, but it came out weak. "You still remember that?"
"I remember everything about you," she said. "You're my little sister."
Her voice cracked the wall I had built overnight. I wanted to tell her everything — that I met someone who made me feel both alive and ashamed, that I didn't know if I wanted to stop seeing him, that the someone was her boss's brother. But I couldn't. I couldn't break her trust like that.
So I lied again. "I'll be fine. I promise."
She nodded slowly, studying me like she was trying to see through the lie but didn't want to push. "Alright. But you know you can tell me anything, right?"
"Of course." I smiled. My chest burned with it.
The waiter dropped two plates of pancakes and eggs. We thanked him, and for a moment, I could almost breathe. We talked about random things — her job, the weather, how expensive coffee had become. She laughed more than she should have, maybe trying to fill the space between us.
When my phone buzzed, I froze.
A message.
Cory: "We need to talk. Same place. Don't be late."
I turned the screen face down immediately, forcing my face to stay blank. Elena noticed.
"Who's that?" she asked.
"Uh, no one. Just a friend checking in."
Her brow lifted slightly, curious but gentle. "You've got that look again. The one you had when you were sixteen and trying to hide bad grades."
I laughed quickly. "No, nothing like that."
But my hand trembled slightly when I picked up my fork.
---
We walked home together after breakfast, the air heavy with unspoken things. The street was quieter than usual. Elena talked about a small office party planned next week, her voice bright but tired.
At the corner, she paused. "You sure you're alright, Vanessa?"
"Yeah."
She studied me for a few seconds, eyes soft but sharp. "Sometimes you scare me. You look like you're holding the world together with your bare hands."
I didn't answer. I smiled instead, because it was easier.
Inside the apartment, I went straight to my room. The phone buzzed again.
Cory: "Don't ignore me."
My chest tightened. I typed back fast, fingers shaking.
Me: "I said I'd come."
The dots appeared. Then stopped. Then appeared again.
Cory: "Good. Don't forget what you owe me."
I stared at the screen until my reflection blurred on it. The light from the window hit my face, but I didn't feel warm.
Somewhere in the kitchen, Elena was laughing softly at something on her phone. That sound — so familiar, so safe — made me hate myself a little more.
I lay back on the bed, staring at the ceiling.
He said we needed to talk.
He said not to be late.
And even though I wanted to ignore him, I knew I wouldn't.
Because somewhere between fear and curiosity, I had already lost control.