Chapter 30: The Intern Tribunal
(Arc 2: Audit from Heaven – Continuation)
The tribunal chamber smelled faintly of incense and fear. Rows of floating scrolls hovered like silent witnesses, each glowing faintly with divine ink. At the center, Ne Job stood on a circular sigil labeled "Pending Termination (Intern-Class)", which he didn't find very encouraging.
Lord Bureaucrat Xian presided at the high podium, robes so crisp they looked ironed by lightning. Assistant Yue stood beside him, holding a binder so thick it could be used as a blunt weapon.
"Intern Ne Job," Lord Xian began, his voice echoing through the marble hall, "you stand accused of violating Regulation 72-C, subsection 'Unauthorized Sentience Generation,' and Article 9, 'Disturbing the Peaceful Order of Paperwork.' How do you plead?"
Ne Job straightened his tie — or at least the tangle that used to be one. "Uh... mildly guilty with mitigating creativity?"
A low murmur ran through the scrolls. One unrolled itself to write: 'Bold. Possibly delusional.'
Yue sighed, rubbing her temple. "My Lord, as his supervising assistant, I request leniency. The form's behavior was not entirely Ne Job's doing — the cursed pen was an unregistered artifact from the warehouse."
"Then why," Xian said coolly, "did the artifact only awaken under his handwriting?"
Ne Job raised his hand meekly. "Maybe the paperwork sensed my passion?"
Lord Xian slammed his gavel. "It sensed your incompetence!"
The scrolls quivered, writing in unison: "Order! Order!"
At that moment, the heavy doors creaked open. Princess Ling entered, her presence like sunlight cutting through the bureaucratic fog. She held a sealed scroll with a red ribbon — the symbol of Royal Audit Intervention.
"Lord Xian," she said softly, "the Heavenly Treasury has reviewed this case. The Form 66-B anomaly generated surplus processing revenue — the chaos produced triple the standard soul quotas due to panic filing."
The entire tribunal froze.
"So you're saying..." Lord Xian began.
"Yes," she smiled faintly. "By bureaucratic law, any anomaly that boosts efficiency, no matter how unintended, cannot be punished. It must instead be... replicated."
Yue's eyes widened. "Wait. You mean—"
"Yes," Ling continued. "Ne Job is hereby reassigned to the Experimental Department of Form Evolution. Effective immediately."
Ne Job blinked. "That sounds... important?"
"It's not," Yue muttered. "It's a glorified paperwork zoo."
Lord Xian sighed deeply, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Fine. But if he turns another form sentient, I want him transferred to the Mortal Realm Filing Basement."
The tribunal adjourned with a chorus of fluttering scrolls.
As they exited, Ne Job leaned toward Yue and whispered, "See? I told you paperwork innovation was the future."
She glared at him. "You're not an innovator, Ne Job. You're a natural disaster with a pen."
Ne Job grinned. "Then let's hope the Experimental Department is insured."