"Phuong, I'm sorry."
Khang apologized with an aggrieved expression, his eyes brimming with tears, which made my heart melt: "It's okay, I don't blame you."
I wasn't just placating him; I truly didn't blame him. Everyone has their own unspoken troubles, and I'm not the type to probe to the very end.
Seeing me say this, Khang didn't look happy. A shadow of gloom flickered in his eyes. But he was very good at hiding it, immediately flashing a radiant smile at me, so quickly that I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me.
His voice was a little tired and sorrowful: "That day, I really only planned to be gone for three days. I went to the city to see my cousin - you've probably met him, it's Vu. I had originally asked him to bring something for me, and I intended to come back right after getting it."
Khang looked directly into my eyes and said hesitantly, "I didn't mean to hide it from you. Things were very complicated back then, and I was afraid of getting you involved, so I didn't say anything. Something happened to my family, and my cousin took me away immediately. I didn't even have time to say goodbye to you."
Khang nestled into my embrace aggrievedly, seeming a little guilty. I wanted to tell him that he didn't need to feel guilty, that I understood his actions, but the words wouldn't come out.
He hugged my waist tightly.
"Phuong, you have no idea. On the way back, although I always appeared calm, I was scared to death inside. It's so chaotic outside. I heard there's a type of disease caused by a special vaccine.
Many places already had a lot of people starving to death from lack of food and water, and now this disease suddenly broke out. The sick quickly shrivel up, their skin darkens, they vomit, and they stop eating or drinking. They look no different from puppets.
These people also deliberately scratch and bite others, presumably to spread the disease.
Because of this illness, the already overloaded food supply points have completely collapsed, and many people have fled. Foreign countries are no better; I heard they were the first to be infected. Right now, the whole world is reeling from the continuous harsh climate. Where would they find the strength to deal with this vicious disease? I don't know when it will end."
I handed some water to Khang. He took careful sips, not daring to gulp it down. A sharp pang shot through my heart; I wondered how long it had been since this fool had a proper drink of water. He was severely malnourished; I could feel nothing but bones when I hugged him. I had to nurse him back to health when we get back.
After drinking the water, Khang continued:
"My cousin was assigned a mission during the crisis, and I couldn't return on my own, so I had to follow him to this town, Moc Chau. We encountered too many refugees along the way to save them all, and the army is severely short-staffed.
The population has dropped sharply in the past six months, and the army's food reserves are also gradually depleting. They can't support so many people. It's a very cruel and complicated problem. I don't know how long my cousin's post can hold out; maybe even the electricity will be completely cut off soon."
Khang's mood was very low. I knew that what he was telling me had surely been toned down a lot, a way of letting me know what a hell on earth it was like outside.
For the first time, I felt a little lucky that my hometown was so remote.
I was clumsy by nature and didn't know how to comfort people. I recalled that whenever my Banh Nep felt wronged, he would want me to stroke his head. I wondered if this method would work on Khang.
As I thought this, my hand was already on Khang's soft hair, gently stroking his head.
Khang showed no surprised reaction. He obediently nuzzled his head into my palm, looking exactly like Banh Nep whenever he was being affectionate.
I chose some stories from the village to tell Khang, but I glossed over the bloody cruelty of that night. When Khang heard my description of the strange appearance of those people, he was also very surprised; it was completely different from the normally infected people he had encountered on the road.
I had also thought about the peculiarity of that group of people; it was a pity there was no way to find out the truth.
Khang's eyes were still a little red. He buried his face in my chest, rubbing back and forth against my collarbone. His rubbing made my heart beat wildly, but I couldn't bring myself to push him away.
The temperature in the room was very high; even someone like me, who is less affected by the heat, found it unbearable. Sweat made my shirt stick to my skin, a clammy and unpleasant feeling. I wondered if Khang felt hot in my embrace.
I lowered my head and gently pushed his head away a little.
Khang glanced at me, a pout on his face: "What's wrong, are you tired of me!"
That look in his eyes seemed to say, "Just you dare say you are."
I was a bit flustered. It really wasn't that I was tired of him; it was just too hot, and I was afraid he would get heatstroke.
Khang sat perched on my lap, his small face flushed from the heat. His white shirt was soaked with sweat and clung to his body, the two small buds on his chest peeking through the fabric.
The sight made my mouth and throat go dry, but he seemed to have no reaction, still sulking about me pushing his head away.
His originally pale lips were now tinged a powdery pink from the heat. His large, watery eyes still held a look of fatigue, with faint dark circles underneath. The rims of his eyes were still a little red; I didn't know how long he had been this tired.
"Khang..." I hesitated, not knowing what to say.
Seeing my hesitation, Khang giggled, a mischievous glint in his eyes. He cheerfully wrapped his arms around my neck: "What is it? Go on and say it. Whatever it is, I'll take care of it."
He looked at me with a confident expression, tinged with a bit of pride.
My mind was in a bit of a mess again. With great difficulty, I managed to tear my eyes away from the two small points that were playing hide-and-seek before me. For a moment, I didn't know how to begin.
In my more than twenty years of life, I have rarely expressed my desires to others. But right now, there was only one question in my heart: "Khang, do you want to come home with me?"
This sentence kept circling in my head, tormenting my will, but when the words reached my lips, they faltered several times before turning into: "Do you need to change your clothes?"