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Chapter 9 - Shaken Emotions

"…you really should visit him and cheer him up, damn it! It's been days, and you still haven't gone to see him! I don't know what happened between you two, but seeing him like that makes me want to cry!"

Maldie finally finished scolding Shion. She was giving him a tongue-lashing like a mother to a misbehaving child.

The prince allowed it because he owed her a lot.

When Maldie had first started working in the palace, Shion was still a boy. She had taught him how to control his emotions and cared for him like her own child while his mother was at death's door.

The prince sighed.

"Alright, I'll do it," he said flatly. "But now, please let me finish my work."

Maldie stood from her chair and slammed her hand down on the desk. Shion's eyes shifted first to her slightly chubby palm, then – in surprise – to the look on her face.

That face he knew all too well over the years: If you don't do this right now, I'll kick your ass. Of course, Maldie had never raised a hand against him as a servant, but that one look always worked on him.

"This can wait. A few minutes won't kill you. Worst case, you stamp a few less pages – big deal. Your father used to slap seals on documents half-heartedly and somehow managed."

"Yes, and then I had to drag the country out of an economic crisis," Shion replied sharply.

"Well, if you could fix that, then sparing a few minutes for your key won't make the kingdom collapse."

"…looks like I have no argument left to refuse."

Shion stood from his desk. He told Maldie to go check on Ayame, since her condition had been worrying him lately.

*

Haru was sitting at his mirror, brushing his hair.

I've lost even more weight after eating so little these past few days.

Maybe I became too slim?But I kind of like my figure.

"Boss! The prince is here to see you!" 

"Huh?" Haru almost dropped his brush in surprise.

So sudden?! Shit! I'm not prepared at all!

He glanced down. He was wearing nothing but a tight, silk pink robe.

I've got nothing else on – I just got out of the shower! I can't face him like this!

But I don't have time to change, damn it, what do I do?! I can't refuse or delay when Shion finally decided to come…

In the end, Haru invited the prince inside anyway.

"How are you feeling?" Shion asked, eyes drifting to Haru's long hair, still slightly damp.

Haru turned toward him, then stood up. The robe shifted, revealing one of his smooth, delicate legs, but Haru didn't notice.

For the first time, Shion blushed in embarrassment.

"What's wrong? Do you have a fever too? I didn't give you my cold the last time I came, right?" Haru asked, moving closer and laying his hand on Shion's forehead.

Why am I worrying about him? …Who am I kidding?

I know he risked so much to save me.

Thanks to Ayame, I'm sure now it wasn't just a dream.

"That's not it," Shion answered, keeping his usual calm tone.

The fruity scent of Haru's freshly washed body drifted toward Shion, warm and sweet.

"Then what is it?"

Haru glanced down at his robe, cheeks burning. Flustered, he tugged it closed, trying to hide the slit that showed his leg up to the thigh.

"Seriously?! Where are you looking at?!" Haru's voice rose, half teasingly, half in something softer he couldn't name. 

"No, it's not like that…" Shion stammered, thrown off. He didn't know how to respond.

Only with Haru, Shion could put the veil away. Only Haru could see his face not behind a fabric. Shion's dark black-purple eyes looked at him in silence.

The quiet hung heavily between them, making Haru a bit nervous.

I want him to remember… I want that memory to come back to him.

I want it to stay in his heart for a long time. I want him to feel that same warmth.

After a moment, Haru decided to speak his mind.

"Shion," he said, holding his hand tenderly, "only Ayame and I remember what happened, but I'll make sure you do too. I don't want you to forget that wonderful moment, you hear me?"

Shion's eyes widened in surprise. The moment Haru's hand touched his, the pain in it stopped.

His hands are so small and fragile, but when they hold mine… it feels like the comfort of a home I always wished for. A fire that doesn't burn you…

Suddenly, Shion lifted his other hand to his forehead, frowning. A sharp migraine hit him out of nowhere – and with it, a memory from a dream. He was touching Haru's cheek and shortly after Haru laid his hand over Shion's.

Huh? What is this?Did this really happen?

This moment… it feels so distant, as if it took place a long time ago. But Haru's only been here for two weeks.

"What's wrong?" Haru asked, genuinely worried.

Once again, their eyes met.

Those lifeless eyes… I want to see what's really behind them.

At first it felt strange, but back when we met at the market… something pulled me toward them. What's hiding in that emptiness, Shion?

Haru lost control of himself. Their lips were dangerously close.

He turned away, cheeks burning red, his eyes sparkling with admiration.

"F-forgive me, Prince. I-I shouldn't…"

"It's fine," Shion said, touching his own hand.

Another memory came back – of Haru healing him in the dream, the pain returning later, only to fade again now at Haru's touch.

Then, another, stronger migraine struck Shion

"I'm sorry, Haru. I need to go now. My head suddenly started hurting badly. I'll take some medicine and get back to work."

"O-okay," Haru replied, his voice quivering with feeling. 

On his way out, Shion looked at the stack of papers on Haru's desk.

"Are those apology letters? Did you finish them?"

"Yes. I couldn't bring them to you earlier. I only started feeling better this morning. I was planning to come after my bath, but you were quicker, haha…" Haru added with a nervous laugh.

"No problem. I'll go through them today. If needed, I'll correct and rewrite them," Shion said, glancing through the papers quickly.

"Thank you for the help, Prince. And sorry for being a burden."

"What matters is that you're trying to make up for it. I hope you won't have to go through such a terrible illness again," Shion replied, then left.

Haru's heart pounded like a drum.

He pressed his hand to his chest. Tears welled up and ran down his face.

I hope… I hope Shion will remember our first kiss. That I'll bring that precious moment back to his mind.

But why does it hurt so much… that he treats me as if nothing ever happened between us?

It's so… awful. I don't want to feel this way...

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