Chapter 1 - Prologue: Breaking Order

January 1st, 1936

11:55 p.m.

Veil Tund, Cyros

Teleria

𓋹

Kael

There she is. 

The lightning that always kissed my skin when our eyes met. I thought the decade between us would diminish this spark. If not that, I thought the fact that I've seen her across a thousand lives would prepare me for her beauty in the next.

But she is just as beautiful as the first time we sparked creation together, and as breathtaking as the day I lost her.

How could I forget her? How could I not remember where I laid my heart? How could I walk around dead and blind to what gave me life?

The fragments are hazy, but the love remains. It is an undeniable inferno of passion.

As her hips sway and the rhythm bends to her will, I, like others around, stare mesmerized.

I approach her with cautious reverence, hoping to relish her favor. 

"May I have a dance?" As the music comes to the climax, she turns as graceful as she always is, and our eyes meet. 

Brown and gold. 

A flash of her, but in clothing from a time older than now, appears and disappears.

The familiar sparks of electricity tingle beneath my skin, every fiber of my being itching to touch her one more time.

I could feel the gaze of the other men around me fixated on her, just as hypnotized as I was. But I threw them to the back of my mind as I gazed at my Goddess.

My eyes traced the soft curve of her waist, the curve of her breast to the rich brown of her neck. 

"Do you think you can manage me, white boy?" My eyes snap to hers. I almost forgot when and where we were. I laughed at her comment, seeing the familiar fire in her eyes. The fire that is always challenging me.

"Only if you'll let me?" I offer her my hand, never breaking eye contact, hoping she would fulfill my life's purpose, being near her.

She looks around warily, but like a missing puzzle piece coming into place, her hand finds mine, and we begin to dance.

I do not know the song playing, and I do not hear the surrounding murmurs. All I know is I do not want this moment to end.

I draw her closer to me, and I hear her soft gasp at the intimacy. Nervousness and excitement flutter through me at her being in my arms again. My fingers around her waist flex as I become hyper aware of her closeness.

I watched the way she tilted her head back, lost in the rhythm of the song, dead to the seduction she exuded.

I see her in my mind again, but this time naked, hands that seem to be mine running along her supple body.

"Do you believe in love at first sight?" My voice is a low whisper, hoping she leans in closer so I can feel her breath on my skin. 

She tilts her head back to look up at me, a small smile slowly spreading on her full lips.

"Do you?" She knows the answer. I know she does. How can she see the look in my eye and not know?

"In every life we've lived." She lets out a little laugh that has me smiling, then rests her head on my shoulder. I kiss her head, relishing her smell. "I miss your coils."

Another memory flashes, this time her on a horse with her hair wild and free. It's different from the perfectly laid finger curls she has now.

She hums in satisfaction as I hold her closer. "You'll see them soon." 

And as we sway to music too fast for a dance too slow, I ache for the moment to last forever.

Forever.

This thought almost sobers me from this dream of finding her again. We must act now; I can feel it. Something sinister is closing in, but I tell myself, just five more minutes.

Five more minutes before we part again. 

"I won't forget you again... Find me..." My eyes snap open as more memories from my last life pour in. My head aches as the past seeps in.

"Don't...find me... forget."

"Are you okay?" I snap into her eyes, as if I am looking at her for the first time. Time slows, and I look at the glowing light emitting from her womb that, from the reaction of those around us, only I can see.

"Forget." The flashes are more aggressive the longer I hold her. Her face before me morphs into a bloodied one, tears of blood streaming down. "Kael, forget."

I see the same realization dawn on her face as our memories come back. 

"Vera, what did you do?" She does not have to answer, as the continuous assault of the past reminds me. Dread fills me, but she brings my hand to her chest to ground me. 

"We don't have time; you must complete the ritual now. He's coming."

"Broken throne, divided soul.

Ashed reborn, maiden whole.

Golden blood, breath unmade.

Reap the shard where soul is laid.

Chaos-borne mother bound to skin.

Slip the husk and bloom again." 

I plunge the knife into her chest, and a gasp escapes her lovely mouth. As if the world senses her death approaching, the darkness thickens. 

As the life dims from her eyes, I hold her tighter. Each time it happens, it shatters me all over again. No matter how many times I endure it, coldness seeps into my veins at the agonizing loss that twists beneath my skin, determined to keep me in perpetual pain. Every time, it cuts just as deep, as if my heart is being torn open for the very first time. 

The weight of what I must do doesn't get lighter; it only learns new ways to break my already broken spirit.

With wilted breath, she reaches out to touch my face. Tracing every edge, curve, and crevice. "One last time." Her cheeks glisten, and for a moment, I think she's crying, but I understand the cruel truth soon after. 

It's not her sorrow painting her skin. It's mine. My tears now slipping down her face as if my grief needed a softer place to fall.

"One last time." I kiss her one last time until the next time. I hold her hand to my face as her body grows heavier. The knot forming in my throat, a collar of despair.

As her body shatters and comes undone, so does my heart. Fragments of her being turn into soft golden light, floating upwards. I wail as she withers away, every piece of her gone as if she was never there.

"Draknir, it's time to go." Aliester draws me from my grief momentarily. Before he comes, I let him take me away for a lifetime of grief and confusion till I see and remember her again.