Xiao Zhi's first conscious thought was that she was blind. Or dead. Or perhaps both.
Everything was pitch black, and her eyelids felt like they'd been glued shut.
Giving up on her eyes, she tried her other senses instead. That's when she caught the scent. It wasn't the stale tang of coffee or the familiar musk of cat fur. It was something... expensive. A faint, elegant fragrance. The kind of scent found in luxury spas she could never afford. Wherever she was, it definitely wasn't her dump of an apartment.
And she was sure hospitals wouldn't smell like this either.
When she finally managed to open her eyes, she winced. The sunlight was too bright, and that didn't sit right with her. Her apartment was so dimmed and poorly ventilated that it was basically gloomy all day.
Where am I?
She sat up slowly and noticed something weird beneath her. This wasn't her creaky mattress. The bed was firm but also softer than anything she had ever touched.
Her mind went blank.
She remembered the fuse box last night, and the way the current had slammed through her body.
"Did I die?"
Xiao Zhi glanced at her surroundings. The room she was in looked like a scene straight out of a big-budget historical drama.
"…So… is this… heaven?"
She glanced at her hands. Pale and slender, with perfect nails that looked like they belonged on a magazine cover. Not her hands, absolutely not. She wiggled her fingers, half expecting them to vanish.
They didn't.
"Oh my gosh. Did heaven give me a hand transplant?"
She kicked off the covers in excitement and instantly regretted it.
Her body was wrapped in layers of robes heavy with embroidery, and the weight nearly dragged her back into bed.
Stumbling to her feet, Xiao Zhi stood up and caught sight of a mirror. Or at least that's what she thought it was. It looked too dull, and the bronze-colored glass didn't reflect her face properly.
But it still made her freeze when she saw a stranger staring back.
Porcelain skin, hair flowing like dark silk, dressed in hanfu-style robes, finer than anything she had ever laid eyes on. It was her face, alright, but somehow different. She looked less like a person and more like the lead actress of a period drama she binge-watched on the weekend.
"Heaven is real…" She touched her cheek with her manicured fingers, barely believing the reflection staring back at her. "I must've been really, really good in my last life."
A laugh slipped out. "Forget heaven. This is a miracle! I never even washed my hair more than once a month, and don't get me started on nail salons."
She wiggled her fingers again at the mirror. "Manicure by angels. I could get used to this."
But before she could cheer any louder, the door creaked open.
A maid rushed in and nearly tripped. Her eyes went wide.
"Princess Lian Zhi! You're awake!"
Xiao Zhi stiffened. "…Come again?"
The maid bowed. "Thank the heavens. After you collapsed in the garden, we feared the worst."
Princess. Lian Zhi.
Wait, I knew that name. Where have I heard it before?
When the memory surged in, she felt her soul leaving her body.
"Wait. Princess Lian Zhi? The concubine-born? The tragic character from the manuscript I'd been mocking last night?"
Her smile faded. "Maybe heaven isn't that nice after all."
Her eyes wandered the room. The incense, the wooden windows, the phoenix-embroidered bed, the silk hanfu… every detail screamed that manuscript.
"No way. Heaven wouldn't give me that nightmare. Couldn't they at least drop me into a peach blossom garden with a dozen hot immortals? Or a cheesy CEO romance? Anything but this."
"Your Highness?" The voice of the maid snapped Xiao Zhi back to reality.
Xiao Zhi forced a crooked smile. "Yep, totally normal. Princess Lian Zhi. That's me."
Before she could even think, another servant appeared. "Her Highness is summoned to the Great Hall, immediately."
"Summoned? Great hall?" Xiao Zhi barely had time to blink before the maids seized her hands. "Hey, wait!"
The maids dragged her out of the room, adjusting her hair and smoothing her silk robes as they moved her along. She nearly tripped with every step and cursed at the heavy robes.
The hall they dragged her into was massive, lined with jade pillars and golden dragons. Officials stood stiffly on both sides, staring without blinking.
At the throne sat a man in dragon robes with a presence as heavy as a storm. She didn't need anyone to explain.
He's the Emperor.
Beside him sat a woman in similar design robes, with a perfect calm expression. Her posture was composed, and her smile was thin as a blade.
Must be the Empress.
In front of them, a girl was kneeling and sobbing.
"Father! I cannot marry into the Tughril Khanate. They are cruel, heartless barbarians. Please spare me!"
According to the story she had read, that must be the first princess, Lian Yue.
Xiao Zhi's brain screeched.
No. No, no, no! I knew this scene. This is where the tragedy begins. The First Princess cries her way out, and the concubine-born Lian Zhi gets thrown to the wolves.
She felt a sudden, freezing chill crawling up through her body. She had read this chapter last night. She'd laughed at how stupid Lian Zhi was, a noble sacrifice and tragic death.
And now she was that idiot.
"The Khanate requested the First Princess. To refuse now is an insult. They will see it as a war declaration." The Emperor's voice echoed across the hall.
Princess Lian Yue sobbed harder. "Father, please! I'll die if you send me!"
Then the Empress spoke. She sounded calm, but her voice was strong and firm. "Yue'er is frail. Forcing her would kill her. But…"
Her eyes slid toward Xiao Zhi.
"... Lian Zhi is strong. She will endure."
Xiao Zhi's pulse spiked.
Wait, did she just volunteer me as tribute?!
"Enough!" The Emperor slammed his hand on the throne. "Very well, it is decided. Princess Lian Zhi will wed the Grand Prince of the Tughril Khanate!"
Yep, that just happened.
Xiao Zhi almost chuckled at how easy it was for the Emperor to throw her under the bus. She knew Lian Zhi was not favored, but he could at least have shown a little bit of hesitation before changing his mind.
Lian Yue sobbed prettily. But when she lifted her face, Xiao Zhi caught a quick, sharp glint of triumph.
What kind of heaven is this?
Where were the pretty angels? Where's the floating cloud?
This wasn't heaven at all. This is glitch heaven. A cheap knockoff, a cruel joke wrapped in silk, and she was the punchline.
Back in her quarters, she collapsed onto the bed. Her head was splitting open. Princess Lian Zhi will wed… The words looped in her head like a broken record.
She buried her face into the pillows. "Why this? Out of all the books, why this one?"
Her voice muffled against the silk. "I would've taken a CEO novel. I'd marry some domineering president who secretly makes breakfast at 7 a.m. Heck, I'd even take a cultivation world. At least there'd be magic. But noooo... I got the tragic character express ticket."
She rolled over and stared at the embroidered ceiling. The phoenixes seemed to laugh at her misery. "You guys think this is funny? Ha. Ha."
In the book, Lian Zhi died miserably. Someone who was betrayed and forgotten.
Now that "someone" was her. She hugged the silk quilt tighter. "Nope. Not happening."
She tugged the quilt over her head. "God… If you're listening… can I get a setting change? Please? I did good things in the past, right? Recycling, donations, and that one time I helped an old lady cross the street. That counts, right?"
Just as she finished her one-on-one complaint session with the heavens, her door slammed open again.
"Zhi'er! Are you all right?" A middle-aged woman rushed in. Her eyes were wet with worry.
"I heard the news." The woman stopped in front of her, her voice trembling with outrage. "How could the Emperor do this to you?"
Xiao Zhi froze.
"M-Mama?"
Her eyes widened as she stared at the familiar face, the same face she hadn't seen since she was sixteen.
Her mother.
Alive and standing right in front of her.