Ellis woke up with a tired groan, the light of the sun making him squint. His light blonde hair, wavered slightly in the wind, along with the grasses, wheats and barleys.
Groggily, he pushed himself up, and the sun... It felt good?
"Huh? Where am I?" He muttered.
The sun was high up in the sky, painting the landscape in a yellow gold hue, grasses waved and bent in the direction of the sweet breeze. The entire scenery looking like...
"Paradise." A voice called from behind him.
He jolted at the voice, his emotions going entirely haywire just from its warmth. Comforting and soothing it almost drowned the soul.
He was startled quite alright, but that wasn't the entire reason for his fierce reaction. If anything, it could only pass up for a very small percentage. The main reason was because that voice sounded very familiar.
Ellis didn't turn back... He couldn't bring himself to. He was afraid. Afraid that it was a trick, afraid that he would be disappointed if he turned back, and it wasn't real.
At the same time, he was angry, angry with whoever or whatever was playing with his mind. Angry at himself, because if it wasn't for him...
"Haaaah!" The voice sighed deeply from behind him, "it's not your fault." It came again, as though able to read exactly what he was thinking.
"Shut up!" He barked.
"Is that how you talk to your elders now? Didn't your father teach you well?" The voice queried at his outburst.
"How dare you? I said shut up!" Ellis roared, and even yet, did not turn.
Right now, he was angry. Infact, this was probably the most infuriated he had ever been in his entire life? How dare they talk to him like that? How dare the bastard talk about his father like that? And how dare they insult his m...
"You still let your anger get into your head. Still cannot face your fears. Why act so calm and collected when you know it is a lie?" The voice edged on mockingly.
"Stop!" His voice quietened.
"Stop? Again you're about to run away from your fear. What was all your conviction all about?" The voice continued, not letting up in the slightest.
"Please stop!" Ellis begged, his voice choking slightly on a breakdown he was forcefully reining back in.
"Please stop... J... just stop."
Hearing his own words, seemed to flood his whole blood with disgust. If he could see himself from a third person's perspective, he would undoubtedly puke his guts out from disgust.
However as much as he was angry, as much as he was disgusted, as much as he wanted to rip apart the person talking behind him, he was very much afraid.
No matter how venomous those words sounded, no matter how it poisoned his mind, and made his heart constrict, he just couldn't bring himself to hate the voice. And even though it was twisted now, and the tone wasn't like he remembered, he couldn't find any cell in his body, capable of acting against it.
It was even more damaging, because everything the voice said was true. He was calm and composed alright, but at the same time, he was led by anger.
Why had he hated rich people so much back on Earth? It was anger. Intense hatred and anger. Worse was that it was his fault, or he believed... No, he knew it was his fault.
Why had he attempted the entrance exam into Wexford Academy, knowing fully well that his family was incapable of sorting his fees? Even against the strong opposition from his father, and even proceeded to smash every paper, getting perfect marks for each subject and obliterating every held record in the school, to the point of even bagging a scholarship?
It was anger. Anger at the rich, for something he caused, and also anger for what he perceived as injustice. Why should the rich get the best education, and the poor, only get sub-par, because they couldn't afford it?
Why had he felt the need to utterly demolish the spirit of his classmates and peers, with academics and his bladed tongue, even feeling it was right... No... feeling it was his right?
The same anger. Because they were rich! Why did he hate the rich? Because he believed they were the reason for "her" death. Why was she in such a position in the first place? It was because of him.
But this time, demolishing them, wasn't just anger alone, there was something else. An insecurity he hid inside. He was afraid. Afraid of the same thing that happened to "her", happening to him, because he wasn't as valuable.
He was afraid of being mediocre. He hated it, he feared it.
Why was he so disgusted with himself when he recalled his reaction to that beast's gaze? Because he feared his reaction, he feared that feeling of powerlessness before its gaze. But more than that, he feared the beast's gaze itself... Utter disregard.
It was like it was looking at an ant. Even mediocrity couldn't describe his position before that beast. He hated that feeling, he feared it. So he had decided to chase strength, to become so strong, nobody looked at him like that again.
And now, he was still afraid. He was running away from his fear, he was running away from his past, he was running away from his mother... Or this place's twisted incarnation of her.
He missed her so much, but couldn't bear to face this sick and cheap copy. He couldn't muster up the will to face it and rebuke it. Tell it how disgusting it was, to use his mother to get to him.
But it was only natural... He was still a child, just like he was that day when it all happened.
"Ellis Jonathan... Or should I say Sean Storme? Are you still going to run away from your fears? How far can you run? Can you out run yourself?" The voice... His mother's voice, Sarah's voice, came through again like a whip, biting and tearing into his soul with a mocking sneer.
"I SAID SHUT UP!!!" He roared, forcing his entire body to turn.
Screw it! At this point, he couldn't give a damn! He would make sure to rip this bastard apart. It was right with everything it said, but so what?!
"Sean?" A confused voice called him.
"Ugh?" His replied confused. The surrounding had again morphed to what looked like the inside of a luxurious car.
His voice came out different yet familiar... A voice he had only recently, gotten used to, coming out of his mouth.
"Who are you shouting at? And... Why are you crying?"