Why is life celebrated, while death grieved? What is so special about life? Do people search for a purpose only to avoid confronting these questions and make life seem worth living?
I was lost in my thoughts when someone called my name.
"Mike...Mike!"
I looked up, Mr Smith looked angry...
"Why are you sleeping in my class!?"
"I wasn't sleeping, Mr Smith. I was thinking."
"What are you thinking about in my class?"
"About how beautiful the sky looks."
The other students burst out laughing. I wonder what was so funny about it. I looked to my side and saw that Amelie wasn't laughing. She was looking at me.
"Why are you thinking about that in a math class!? This is a math class, not a literature or arts class. Focus on the lecture."
"Okay..."
Mr Smith went back to teaching. I find his classes very boring.
"It wasn't me. I promise," Amelie said to me in a soft tone.
Why does she need to clarify that? I sighed.
"I know that you didn't snitch on me."
"You trust me!" She said, looking relieved. Humans are such simple creatures.
"I don't have any reasons not to trust you."
"I don't know how I feel about that response." She seemed kind of...disappointed. Did she expect a different response?
I rest my head on the table and look out the window. The sky is clear with white clouds scattered on it. It looks beautiful to me. Then my peace was broken...again. Mr Smith called me to solve the problem written on the board. It was a tough-looking integral. But I had solved it before at home, so it was easy for me. I got up and went to the board. Mr Smith handed me the marker. I solved the problem and gave the marker back to Mr Smith.
"That is the correct solution. You may go back to your seat now," Mr Smith said with a smile. I guess he isn't angry at me now, since I correctly solved the problem.
I went back to my seat and looked out the window.
"You don't pay attention during the lectures, but you are smart!" Amelie said. Is she impressed? Not that it matters, anyway. I will never understand someone like her. She is always so friendly with me, even though I mostly ignore her. I probably come off as rude to her, but she's still so friendly with me. I don't get it.
I turned towards her and said, "Thank you."
She seemed taken aback. Her face turned slightly reddish, and she looked away. I can't tell what that reaction was supposed to mean.
Humans are very predictable at times and very unpredictable at others. Sometimes it's very hard to understand their behaviour. Since I barely interact with anyone, it's even harder for me to understand them. I have some idea about them from books and by observing them from afar. When I'm bored, I try to distract myself by observing people or solving problems.
The bell rang, signalling the end of the period, signalling the next period is lunch break. I'll sleep through this period. I rest my head on the table to sleep.
Just as I was about to fall asleep, a few loud girls started chatting with one another. I can't fall asleep like this...I'm curious about what they are talking about, though.
"Hey, Elisa! You heard about the new transfer, right? What was her name, again?"
"Yeah, Mary, I heard about her. Her name's Amelie."
"Should we invite her during the lunch break to hang out with us? She sits next to that gloomy guy." I'm not gloomy, I'm just not interested in pretending like the rest of you!
"That would be awesome! She seems like a nice girl. It'll be totally fun if she joins us. Being near a guy like him could make her gloomy as well."
"Hey, Amelie! I'm Mary, and this is my friend Elisa. Wanna join us during the lunch break? We've got juicy gossip!"
"Yeah! You transferred here a few days ago, but we never got the chance to introduce ourselves," said Elisa.
"It'll be really fun," said Mary, adding to Elisa.
"Sure!" said Amelie. She's as cheerful as ever.
"Yay!" cheered the two girls.
"Can Mike join us, too?" said Amelie, asking for their approval. Why's she dragging me into this? I just wanna sleep in peace...
"Mike? Oh, that gloomy guy who sits next to you? Why? He is clearly uninterested," said Elisa. She gets it!
"Yeah. He's so gloomy, he'll ruin the mood"
"He's always alone, so I thought it would be nice if he came with us. He won't be a bother. I promise," said Amelie.
"Hey, Mike. Would you like to have lunch with us?" Amelie asked me. I don't like hanging out with people, but I don't have any good reasons to refuse, either.
I look up. Three girls are looking at me with anticipation. This feels so weird.
"I don't have any good reasons to say no. So, sure."
They looked at each other. That response probably wasn't the best...
"Uh...okay?" said Elisa.
"He always responds like that...", said Amelie.
"Cool...Let's roll!" said Mary."
"Yeah...It was supposed to be a yes," I replied to clarify. It sucks to clarify my responses. That's one of the reasons I avoid people.
"Awesome, let's go!" said Elisa. They started walking towards the classroom entrance, and I followed them.
We walked down the stairs, reached the cafeteria and found an empty table with three seats. Since there were four of us, the others took one of the available seats, and I brought one from another table for myself, carefully placed it beside Amelie and sat next to her, without making much sound. The cafeteria was noisy. I don't like crowded places...