After the usual sermon was over, Daniel left, just as my teacher had instructed. When he did, I told Father Azrael everything without hiding a single detail from him. I spoke of the sudden pause, the encounter, the journey, and the Tree.
Father Azrael, who had taken his time listening to me, had a mysterious glint in his eyes.
"You know," he remarked. "I actually thought you were just scared."
Undoubtedly, I was. That was the root of everything in the first place. If I weren't afraid, Satan wouldn't have attempted drawing close to me with his ploy at heart. Especially when it was so wrong, dark, and twisted.
I sought answers. And to be honest, I still do.
Father Azrael had a warm smile on his face as he looked at me like he could read my thoughts.
"Curiosity isn't a bad thing," he said. "As humans, it's in our nature to seek knowledge and understanding."
I knew this.
I definitely knew this much. But why are his words so powerful in my heart?
"However," Father Azrael warned with a slightly heavy tone. "There are complexities in this life, both the physical world and that of the spiritual. As brethren, we have to be pragmatic in our choosing of what we learn and what we don't."
My eyes remained uneasy as ever. Father Azrael's words only reaffirmed the message of the warm, subtle voice in my heart—a voice that had a good record of suggesting the best decisions. It was the voice of the Spirit, which I had begun hearing more clearly ever since my awakening.
I glanced at Father Azrael. "Is there bad knowledge?"
His response was simple and logical. "Knowledge, by itself, can not be considered as something 'good' or 'bad', by man's moral judgment. Knowledge is Knowledge. Whether it's the understanding of how to commit murder or it's the learning of how to sew a bag."
"...."
"At the end of the day," Father Azrael shrugged. "What matters is the impact of that knowledge on the reader."
Hmm…
I guess knowing of the Tree might have been more of a negative than a positive impact on my life, as I cannot forget the image.
"Don't get me wrong," Father Azrael said. "The reader does not always have to act before that knowledge becomes dangerous. At times, the very act of learning it endangers the reader."
I remembered my first exorcism and asked a question. "Like 'Contract of Blood and Soul'?"
"Indeed," answered Father Azrael. "In that situation, reading was the very thing that endangered the reader because he unwittingly participated in a demonic ritual."
"Ritual?"
"Yes," Father Azrael nodded. "The Devil is a liar through and through. He would never reveal his motive so easily. Instead, he'll attempt to lure you by playing on your memories, your pain, and your emotions for you to fulfil his bidding."
Father Azrael picked up his bible and showed it to me. He only revealed the backside of it and withheld the other side, which was the front cover.
"Assume you're someone who's never seen this book before," he said. "What do you think I have in my hand?"
I scratched my head. "Urmm…regardless, I've lived in a Sanctuary all my life, and I've seen a lot of bibles not to recognise one easily. So it's still a bible to me?"
"Are you sure?"
I nodded briefly.
"You're only half-right," he concluded, before turning his wrist to reveal what lay behind.
It was a bible, a cross, and a rosary.
Uhh….
"What I did was a double-layered deception," he explained. "The first deception was making you think I had just one thing in my hand, by drawing your attention to a book which you confidently knew of. That is how Satan questions you about your faith, despite knowing fully well that you wouldn't fall so easily…"
Father Azrael then dropped his bible, cross, and rosary.
"It's because he has a separate goal."
"So…" I asked, "what was the second deception?"
He pointed at the cross and the rosary. "Did you see when I picked them up?"
"No."
"Exactly," he responded. "So, I made you wonder about a book while hiding things behind it. You think you're trying to uncover one thing, but Satan has another thing lying in wait."
Back then….
Back then, Satan told me he would show me my future. But then, he tried tricking me into a covenant instead…
…..
Man, how foolish am I?
...
Father Azrael watched me with a quiet smile. It wasn't the kind that jeered at you (like for having a bald spot), but one that kept your heart at ease by making you feel…secure.
"You seem to be putting things together by yourself," he remarked. "That's how you learn."
Everything he said fit perfectly into the grandiose puzzle that I had laid out in my hand, as if they were pieces that were perfectly designed for this moment. But one thing did not click. Fortunately, it was only something he had yet to say.
"What exactly are covenants?"
"Think of them as pacts that are initiated through rituals," he said. "In your case, the ritual was having you eat the bird. Perhaps, the long-distance walking was part of it."
"So, he was completely playing on my oblivion?"
"Yup, God's people perish because of their lack of knowledge."
"But then," I wondered. "How do you know what a ritual is?"
"It's simple," he answered. "Yet complex at the same time. Rituals do tend to make you do things that you wouldn't usually do. Or things you completely reject from the spirit."
"So if you don't have enough spiritual attunement, you wouldn't have a clue?" I questioned.
"Wow, you're getting sharper," Father Azrael cheered. "Well, most likely. Unless by grace."
Spiritual attunement was simply what it sounded like. It meant being in tune, in sync, and in harmony with the spirit. This implies that one is more aware of spiritual activity even without understanding it, and the deeper your harmony with your spirit, the higher your spiritual attunement.
From now on, thanks to my awakening, my life is sure to never remain the same. Daniel's words during the first moment of our visit to that facility, suggested that I had an unusually high spiritual attunement. Could this be why I can see the Tempter? Or is this a very normal occurrence?
No, I doubt it is. If it was, there would have been more talk on this subject. Perhaps, there's something in me that Satan is desperate to steal, kill, or destroy.
Regardless….
"Thank you very much for this insight, Father Azrael." I bowed shortly in appreciation.
"You're welcome," he said with a smile, "if there's nothing else, you can leave now."
Father Azrael watched me as I turned, as my figure drifted further from his sight, and as I slowly disappeared beyond the slowly closing door.
'Regardless….' I thought.
...
Regardless, I'll win!
...
END OF ARC 1: AWAKENING
A.N: Rrrrriggght! So MTC is just about starting. Hopefully that development wasn't too rapid. Anyways, give your thoughts in the comments below. I would love to hear it.