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Chapter 18 - Chapter 18

Pinako limited their talk time to two hours and threatened them with separate rooms after the first night when she found them trying to draw circles at three in the morning. Drawing circles with his new arm then became another form of therapy for Ed.

Drawing the circles helped him more than he wanted to admit. It was another way to confirm that he really was back where he belonged.

Ed had been back for just over a week. He lay in his bed early one morning and sighed. He felt tired and irritable. His shoulder hurt and his head ached slightly. He could hear Al snoring from the other side of the room and was tempted to smother him with a pillow. His stomach grumbled but he didn't feel hungry. He rolled his shoulder and felt it twinge and wondered if he was on the verge of a fever. He really didn't feel right today.

Maybe he had been pushing himself too hard. After all he'd only had the new arm for five days and the port for two more. He had been using his arm at every chance he could, he had refused to miss any of his therapy. Braiding and circles had helped his dexterity immensely and the light weight lifting had begun to re-strengthen the muscles around his port. He worked hard despite the pain. His shoulder was starting to respond, he could feel it. There had been one moment yesterday when he had suddenly felt it click inside him and he had been overwhelmed with a sense of familiarity. This was how it was supposed to feel. He set himself a goal. Another three weeks and he was going to be able to do alchemy again. By that time his nerves should be almost totally integrated with the port and the likelihood of a painful backlash greatly reduced.

Slipping from the bed in his t-shirt and sleep pants he grabbed some fresh clothes and headed to the bathroom. He checked in the mirror but he didn't seem to be flushed or red and his skin felt cool to the touch. He was getting used to seeing his face as it actually was now rather than mentally superimposing his old visage over it. He untied his hair from the knot he kept it in for sleeping and shook it free. It was down past his waist now when it hung loose and he bit his lip at the thought of maybe getting it trimmed… just a little bit.

Ed stood under the hot water and let it flow over him. He still didn't feel well but he didn't want to worry anyone, especially Al. Something was bothering Al and Ed had no idea what it was. Last night during their usual alchemy-time Ed had gotten the feeling that Al was hiding something from him. They had been discussing alchemical formulae for the manipulation of silicate bases when Ed had felt Al withdraw slightly. They had always been sensitive to each other but age had brought a measure of tact to Ed so he had said nothing and let Al lead the conversation into a different area. But he couldn't see what could've made Al uneasy; after all they had discussed much more controversial and certainly illegal subjects when they were younger.

He frowned as he watched condensation slide down the shower tiles before turning the taps off and stepping out of the shower. He felt irritable again as he towelled himself dry. He was getting more used to his new body too. He didn't jump every time he saw it in the mirror anymore although he would avoid looking unless he absolutely had to.

His new body was somewhat less of a mystery to him now. A few days ago he had stood in front of the mirror and studied his naked body. He had catalogued each change. From the longer line of his neck to the slimmer arm and legs. Muscle definition had disappeared and been hidden under smoother softer planes of flesh. His skin had become a pale gold all over. The slender lines of his body gave an impression of contained elegance. The breasts still intrigued him. The automail port lay just above the swell of the right one. Winry and Pinako had contoured the port so as to avoid causing a misalignment between his breasts. His belly was flat and flared into his slender hips. The golden tangle of pubic curls was softer than he remembered as well there being the matter of a missing member. His first reaction had been one of horror. Moreso than the breasts that he now had, seeing that he no longer had the ultimate symbol of masculinity totally unnerved him. This was the one aspect of the whole change that seemed the most unnatural to him.

But all things considered, Pinako was right. He had indeed lucked out in this change. He didn't see himself as particularly attractive or beautiful but at least he could go out without being totally embarrassed. He was proportional and he had to admit, he was rather pleased with his legs now. Being able to walk barefoot again, and to hear two proper normal footsteps and not one clanking metallic one was wonderful to him. Al had done brilliantly and Ed was going to make sure Al knew that. When he saw Al next, it would be the first thing he was going to do.

He walked back to their bedroom and found Al had obviously woken up and gone downstairs for breakfast. He'd made his bed but had left Ed's as it was. He could've made mine, Ed thought irritably, forgetting that he was supposed to make his own bed as part of his therapy, as he left the room and headed to the kitchen.

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