Chapter 10: The Sabotage Scroll and the Miracle Engine
Ne Job's cubicle now had three clouds, a glowing badge, and a scroll that refused to shut up.
> "Next test in 48 hours. Expect sabotage."
He stared at it. "Define sabotage."
The scroll pulsed ominously and whispered, "Seraphina."
---
The Sabotage Begins
It started with small glitches.
- His miracle queue rerouted to the Department of Divine Plumbing.
- His scroll began autocorrecting "miracle" to "mistake."
- His cloud chair deflated mid-thought.
Zyx appeared, chewing divine gum. "She's targeting your infrastructure. Classic spreadsheet warfare."
Ne Job groaned. "I need a firewall."
Zyx handed him a goat. "This one bites saboteurs."
---
The Hidden Engine
Glitchmaster summoned Ne Job to Sublevel 13.
"We've built something," she said. "A rogue miracle engine. It bypasses tribunal protocols and runs on raw creativity."
Ne Job's eyes widened. "You built a divine API?"
She nodded. "It's unstable, unapproved, and beautiful."
The engine pulsed with chaotic energy. Scrolls floated around it, each tagged with mortal requests too weird for the official system.
- "Make my cat speak French."
- "Turn my ex's house into a marshmallow."
- "Send me a goat. No questions."
Ne Job grinned. "Let's test it."
---
The First Drop
They launched a miracle: a spontaneous rainbow that played lo-fi beats and dropped motivational quotes in mortal inboxes.
Engagement spiked. Mortals tweeted. The tribunal glitched.
Seraphina responded with a counter-miracle: a wave of perfectly timed productivity boosts and spreadsheet blessings.
The divine dashboard split into two factions: Chaos Metrics vs Efficiency Protocols.
Zyx whispered, "It's war now."
---
Espionage Unleashed
Ne Job's scroll was hacked. It began leaking his miracle drafts to Seraphina's team.
He retaliated by embedding memes in her KPI reports.
- One chart showed "Efficiency vs Goat Disruption."
- Another auto-played a remix of "Interns Do It Chaotically."
Seraphina filed a formal complaint. The tribunal responded with a shrug emoji.
---
The Tribunal Cracks
On Day 2, the tribunal summoned both factions.
"Intern #404," a deity said. "Your rogue engine is destabilizing the divine grid."
Ne Job stepped forward. "It's democratizing miracles. Mortals are laughing again. Isn't that divine?"
Seraphina countered. "He's bypassing protocol. That engine is a threat."
Glitchmaster stepped in. "It's a prototype. But it works."
The tribunal paused. The scroll pulsed. A new directive appeared:
> "Initiate trial phase for decentralized miracle engine. Monitor mortal impact. Sabotage prohibited."
Seraphina narrowed her eyes. "This isn't over."
---
Closing Hook
Back in Sublevel 13, the engine hummed. Ne Job received a new scroll:
> "Promotion: Chaos Strategist (Tier 1). Next phase: Mortal Integration. Prepare for field deployment."
He cracked his knuckles. "Time to take chaos global."